The Inbetween
Fourteen
“Hey baby! I was just coming to see you!” Natalie called from the gate. He felt bile rise to the back of his throat but pushed it away. This was not happening. “Are you gonna stand there or are you gonna come and say hello?” She called. Nathan could feel the breath leaving him and the anger replacing it. How dare she?
Holly could see the hurt and anger in Nathan’s eyes and moved her hand from his arm to rest in his hand. As soon as her fingers laced in his he jumped and looked to his right to look straight into her eyes. She wasn’t surprised this time that he could see her; it had been one of the things she had considered might happen when he figured it out. He didn’t smile at her and she didn’t smile back. Instead she squeezed his hand and he nodded his head slightly at her. They both faced forward and Nathan forced his feet to move. With jerky steps he slowly made his way towards her, his facial expression guarded.
The front door to the house opened and they heard Tom’s familiar accent, “Is Nathan back?” Holly glanced over to him to see relief wash over his features when his eyes landed on Nathan, only for a smile to appear on his face when he saw Holly. As they got closer they could see Natalie begin to frown – Holly hadn’t been there when she first saw Nathan. Tom was grinning now; “Guys! Nath’s back, come here!” He shouted back into the house before making his way down the path. “We were getting worried, mate. I’m sorry about what I said earlier, I was only trying to-”
“Oh my God!” Natalie cried, pointing towards Holly and cutting Tom off. By now, Jay, Max and Siva had made their way out to the front of the house but all jumped in shock when Natalie screamed. Their eyes flicked between Nathan, whose face was now twisted into one of sheer fury, Natalie, who had gone grey and looked like she was going to be sick, and Holly, who they could now see again. It quickly became clear that Natalie could also see Holly, and they held their breath, holding their confusion in. “I- I- I’m sorry, I- Oh my God-” Natalie was beginning to hyperventilate, and couldn’t take her eyes away from Holly’s.
“It was you, wasn’t it?” Nathan said calmly, slowly, quietly. Dangerously. Natalie took a step back. “Don’t you dare try and walk away from me right now,” Nathan said and took a step forward.
“What’s going on?” Jay asked.
“It was her. She knocked Holly down. She killed her.” Nathan said, his fists clenching together. Holly had to use her free hand to pry his fingers open from around her hand. She watched the boys’ jaws drop and they whipped their head around to face Natalie who was sobbing.
“I just- It was an accident! I didn’t mean to, I- I just got so scared, I-”
“How could you have gotten scared? You didn’t even try to slow down!”
“I- I did!” Natalie looked frantically between Holly and Nathan.
“I watched the whole thing, Natalie! Twice! I know you didn’t try to slow down, so stop fucking lying about it!”
“Do you want to come inside?” Max asked quietly as he made his way over to Nathan, who shook his head.
“She’s not coming anywhere near this house ever again.”
“Nathan,” Holly spoke for the first time. He blinked, as if he was surprised to hear her, and looked down at her.
“Don’t tell me you want me to forgive her.”
“I’m not going to tell you anything like that. Forgive her if you want to, I don’t care, that’s not up to me,” Holly said, not taking her eyes from him. She leaned up to whisper in his ear; “I just want you to know that I forgive her…” She leaned away from his ear and glanced at him before they both glanced at Natalie, who was frozen in fear. Holly leaned forward again, ignoring his bewildered look, “But she doesn’t need to know that.” She saw the corner of Nathan’s mouth twitch but he didn’t smile.
“How could you live with that?” Nathan asked. “For all the times I spoke to you about it, for all the times I sat up and explained what happened and how I felt about it, for all the times I got angry about it because someone could so easily murder someone, for all those times I cried about it, for all those times I completely broke down about it, for all those times I had nightmares about it, and you just sat there, comforting me and telling me everything was going to be okay?! How the fuck do you sleep at night?!” Nathan had tears forming in his eyes and some spilled over onto his cheeks. His voice was rising and he took another step forward making Natalie flinch and crouch down slightly. Nathan stopped and frowned at her. “I’m not going to hit you, just stand the fuck up and look at me.”
She did as she was told almost immediately, whimpering as she straightened her back. Nathan tugged on Holly’s hand and pulled her closer to Natalie. She grimaced but stayed rooted to the spot, looking at Nathan and stealing small glances at Holly every few seconds; as if she was scared Holly would attack her. Holly couldn’t look at Natalie, so instead looked over to the rest of the boys. Jay kept glancing up and down the street, checking to see if anyone could see them, but was satisfied every time he looked back. Max was standing next to Nathan, looking like he was ready to step in if Nathan found it too much, but Holly was sure Nathan could handle himself. Siva was looking at Natalie, a horrified look in his eyes as he folded his arms across his chest, and Tom wasn’t making his new-found hatred for the girl who had called herself Nathan’s girlfriend for so long subtle, as his disgusted glare wouldn’t leave her frame. She finally looked at Nathan and her heart raced as she finally looked down at their hands. It was as she wiggled her fingers in his that she could feel the warmth radiating from him and she allowed a small smile to grace her lips. She looked back up as Natalie started to speak. “Nathan, I’m so-”
“Don’t tell me you’re sorry,” he bent his face down to her level; “Tell me what you did.” Natalie choked on a sob and looked to the ground. “Natalie,” he said calmly, “Look me in the eyes and tell me what you did.”
Natalie’s body visibly shook with the sobs she was holding back as she looked up slowly and stared into Nathan’s eyes. She took a deep breath; “I knocked your sister down and killed her.” Her voice shook and a strangled sob escaped at the end. Nathan squeezed Holly’s hand and she squeezed it back.
“Now get away from me, my sister, my friends, my house, and don’t ever let me see you again,” Nathan lifted the hand that was laced in Holly’s and wrapped it around her arms, keeping their hands clasped together now over Holly’s stomach. He steered her by Natalie who jumped into action and sprung away from the siblings, fearful of touching Holly. Max took a hold of Holly’s free hand and guided her away from Nathan who had stopped when he closed the gate behind him. She grabbed Tom’s hand and started to pull him towards Jay and Siva as Nathan spoke again. “And in case you didn’t realise, we’re most definitely over.” And suddenly she was inside the front door of the house being hugged by the five people that meant the most to her in this world now.
Holly could see the hurt and anger in Nathan’s eyes and moved her hand from his arm to rest in his hand. As soon as her fingers laced in his he jumped and looked to his right to look straight into her eyes. She wasn’t surprised this time that he could see her; it had been one of the things she had considered might happen when he figured it out. He didn’t smile at her and she didn’t smile back. Instead she squeezed his hand and he nodded his head slightly at her. They both faced forward and Nathan forced his feet to move. With jerky steps he slowly made his way towards her, his facial expression guarded.
The front door to the house opened and they heard Tom’s familiar accent, “Is Nathan back?” Holly glanced over to him to see relief wash over his features when his eyes landed on Nathan, only for a smile to appear on his face when he saw Holly. As they got closer they could see Natalie begin to frown – Holly hadn’t been there when she first saw Nathan. Tom was grinning now; “Guys! Nath’s back, come here!” He shouted back into the house before making his way down the path. “We were getting worried, mate. I’m sorry about what I said earlier, I was only trying to-”
“Oh my God!” Natalie cried, pointing towards Holly and cutting Tom off. By now, Jay, Max and Siva had made their way out to the front of the house but all jumped in shock when Natalie screamed. Their eyes flicked between Nathan, whose face was now twisted into one of sheer fury, Natalie, who had gone grey and looked like she was going to be sick, and Holly, who they could now see again. It quickly became clear that Natalie could also see Holly, and they held their breath, holding their confusion in. “I- I- I’m sorry, I- Oh my God-” Natalie was beginning to hyperventilate, and couldn’t take her eyes away from Holly’s.
“It was you, wasn’t it?” Nathan said calmly, slowly, quietly. Dangerously. Natalie took a step back. “Don’t you dare try and walk away from me right now,” Nathan said and took a step forward.
“What’s going on?” Jay asked.
“It was her. She knocked Holly down. She killed her.” Nathan said, his fists clenching together. Holly had to use her free hand to pry his fingers open from around her hand. She watched the boys’ jaws drop and they whipped their head around to face Natalie who was sobbing.
“I just- It was an accident! I didn’t mean to, I- I just got so scared, I-”
“How could you have gotten scared? You didn’t even try to slow down!”
“I- I did!” Natalie looked frantically between Holly and Nathan.
“I watched the whole thing, Natalie! Twice! I know you didn’t try to slow down, so stop fucking lying about it!”
“Do you want to come inside?” Max asked quietly as he made his way over to Nathan, who shook his head.
“She’s not coming anywhere near this house ever again.”
“Nathan,” Holly spoke for the first time. He blinked, as if he was surprised to hear her, and looked down at her.
“Don’t tell me you want me to forgive her.”
“I’m not going to tell you anything like that. Forgive her if you want to, I don’t care, that’s not up to me,” Holly said, not taking her eyes from him. She leaned up to whisper in his ear; “I just want you to know that I forgive her…” She leaned away from his ear and glanced at him before they both glanced at Natalie, who was frozen in fear. Holly leaned forward again, ignoring his bewildered look, “But she doesn’t need to know that.” She saw the corner of Nathan’s mouth twitch but he didn’t smile.
“How could you live with that?” Nathan asked. “For all the times I spoke to you about it, for all the times I sat up and explained what happened and how I felt about it, for all the times I got angry about it because someone could so easily murder someone, for all those times I cried about it, for all those times I completely broke down about it, for all those times I had nightmares about it, and you just sat there, comforting me and telling me everything was going to be okay?! How the fuck do you sleep at night?!” Nathan had tears forming in his eyes and some spilled over onto his cheeks. His voice was rising and he took another step forward making Natalie flinch and crouch down slightly. Nathan stopped and frowned at her. “I’m not going to hit you, just stand the fuck up and look at me.”
She did as she was told almost immediately, whimpering as she straightened her back. Nathan tugged on Holly’s hand and pulled her closer to Natalie. She grimaced but stayed rooted to the spot, looking at Nathan and stealing small glances at Holly every few seconds; as if she was scared Holly would attack her. Holly couldn’t look at Natalie, so instead looked over to the rest of the boys. Jay kept glancing up and down the street, checking to see if anyone could see them, but was satisfied every time he looked back. Max was standing next to Nathan, looking like he was ready to step in if Nathan found it too much, but Holly was sure Nathan could handle himself. Siva was looking at Natalie, a horrified look in his eyes as he folded his arms across his chest, and Tom wasn’t making his new-found hatred for the girl who had called herself Nathan’s girlfriend for so long subtle, as his disgusted glare wouldn’t leave her frame. She finally looked at Nathan and her heart raced as she finally looked down at their hands. It was as she wiggled her fingers in his that she could feel the warmth radiating from him and she allowed a small smile to grace her lips. She looked back up as Natalie started to speak. “Nathan, I’m so-”
“Don’t tell me you’re sorry,” he bent his face down to her level; “Tell me what you did.” Natalie choked on a sob and looked to the ground. “Natalie,” he said calmly, “Look me in the eyes and tell me what you did.”
Natalie’s body visibly shook with the sobs she was holding back as she looked up slowly and stared into Nathan’s eyes. She took a deep breath; “I knocked your sister down and killed her.” Her voice shook and a strangled sob escaped at the end. Nathan squeezed Holly’s hand and she squeezed it back.
“Now get away from me, my sister, my friends, my house, and don’t ever let me see you again,” Nathan lifted the hand that was laced in Holly’s and wrapped it around her arms, keeping their hands clasped together now over Holly’s stomach. He steered her by Natalie who jumped into action and sprung away from the siblings, fearful of touching Holly. Max took a hold of Holly’s free hand and guided her away from Nathan who had stopped when he closed the gate behind him. She grabbed Tom’s hand and started to pull him towards Jay and Siva as Nathan spoke again. “And in case you didn’t realise, we’re most definitely over.” And suddenly she was inside the front door of the house being hugged by the five people that meant the most to her in this world now.
♠ ♠ ♠
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