Crazy Mixed Up World

So I’ve been thinking about if I want to take the dance and vocal classes all day now. I am really conflicted because I know that it will really hurt to sing because my parents loved it when I did. They said those were the only times when I was really me, when I was performing. So on the other hand I know that my parents would want me to continue to make me happy. I went down to Jonathan to tell him my decision.
“I’ll take the classes” I said
“Are you sure? You don’t have to?” He said to me making sure it was really what I wanted.
“It is. Mom and dad would not want me to give up on my dreams. They would want me to keep singing and dancing and everything else.”
“Do you want me to sign you up to any clubs or anything?”
“I’m not sure yet. For vocals I’m just going to do it on my own because its working on song writing and I think I’ll be able to do it. Also dancing right now is going to be really hard and emotional so one its not fair to a team right now. Two its in the middle of a season and three right now I think I just want to work on solos and stuff and expressing emotions.”
“That’s great. So I was wondering… Would you be interested in singing the national anthems at a hawks game?”
“I don’t know. Starting to sing is one thing but performing is another.”
“What if I did it with you. I think its important for you to start again.”
“You would really sing in front of thousands of people and your team and another NHL team and however many people are watching for me?” I asked him in awe.
“Of course I would. You are my little sister and right now the most important person in the world, just don’t tell David” He told me laughing.
“Okay, when are we doing it?”
“I was thinking tonight’s game. I already know that you know both anthems so why not just get to it.”
“I literally just said that I would start singing again and you already think I can sing in front of a crowd. What makes you so sure?”
“Oh so many reasons. One you are my little sister. You are Toews. You need to do it for yourself. And even though I know that you think you will be alone mom and dad will be with you the whole time. That’s how I know you can do it because you are you and you can do anything. Don’t forget I will be right beside you.” He said giving me a gently hug.
“Okay. What time are we leaving?”
“I a couple hours.”
“So I need to go shower and do my hair and make up.” I said slightly teary eyed. “Oh and you have to help me pick out my outfit I told him before rushing out. And than I felt it, happiness. So I went and took a shower and started doing my make up when I realised I should probably pick out my clothes first so I called Jonathan in.
“Help me pick out what to wear” I whined to him. I didn’t know what to wear to a game when singing the national anthems. I started going through my clothes when I think I found the perfect outfit. I held it and I saw him smile. I knew I hut the nail on the head. I shooed Jon out of my room and got dressed. I went downstairs and we were on our way to the United Centre. I just prayed I didn’t freeze up.