Crazy Mixed Up World

So we got to the restaurant and I have no idea where it is or what the name is but the sight that I got when I came in was outstanding. Everyone was intermingling and running a muck. The coaches and staff were all standing together and the players were all acting crazy. I got a few “good jobs” and “congratulations” and of course “I’m sorry for your losses” on the way to find a seat. Jon found us a seat at a table with Kaner and Sidney Crosby, Kris Letang and Marc-Andre Fleury. After I sat down I heard footsteps behind me.
“JONATHAN TOEWS! Why is her leg not elevated? You should know better than that.” That was the voice of both the head coaches, Dan Bylsma and Joel Quenneville. I think I saw Jon cower a little. He was speechless. They got my leg elevated and than with a final glare at Jon they went back to their table. I don’t know what it is but it made me feel good to know that they cared about me. I was going into my own little world for a while because the next thing I knew I was asked if I wanted to sing because there was a karaoke machine. I said maybe that others should go first.
I decided than that no one should ever give Sharpie or Pascal a microphone. I think my ears were bleeding after their rendition of Old Time Rock and Roll by Bob Segar. Next up and I really have no clue how this happened but Kaner and Sidney were up there singing the Hockey Song by Stomppin’ Tom Connors. Than a bunch of other people went. The guys some how even convinced the coaches to get up there and sing. It was hilarious they sang Sexy and I know it by LMFAO. They are obviously spending way too much time with us if they can sing that entire song.
By the end of the night there would definitely be some good black mail material.
Of course after all the guys sang they came up to me and asked me to sing. Do you know how hard it is to say no to two teams of hockey players? I looked at Jon for help. He just shrugged. “I think you should” than he came up to me and gave me a hug and whispered in my ear “I know it will be extremely hard but I think it will be good for you. I think you should sing something in honour of mom and dad.” He gave me a kiss on the head and than I headed nervously to the stage. I was thinking singing the anthem in front of people was entirely different than singing a song that had meaning in front of people.
“Hey guys, My name is Melissa and I am going to be singing a song in honour of my parents. I want them to know that I miss them very much and that I love them. I also want to dedicate this to my brother Jon. I want to say sorry for giving him such a hard time and that I love him so much.” I looked out at Jonathan and I could tell that he was having a hard time keeping tears in. I also saw Kaner video taping me, which I thought was weird. I started singing Someone Watching Over Me the song that Hilary Duff sang in the movie Raise your Voice. I started off very quiet and almost nervous. This was the first time I would be singing in front of a crowd for real.
Found myself today
Oh I found myself and ran away
Something pulled me back
The voice of reason I forgot I had
All I know is you're not here to say
What you always used to say
But it's written in the sky tonight

That is how I felt when I first came to live with Jonathan. He was the one who pulled me back to reality. I know I am not fully over what happened and I may never be but I know that Jon will always be there for me.

So I won't give up
No I won't break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong
Even if it all goes wrong
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe
Someone's watching over me

I felt like my parents were with me when I was singing this song. I now know that someone is always looking over me. Whether it be my parents or brothers. There is always someone there for me.

Seen that ray of light
And it's shining on my destiny
Shining all the time
And I wont be afraid
To follow everywhere it's taking me
All I know is yesterday is gone
And right now I belong
To this moment to my dreams

I know that I have to go after my dreams. I will manage to get good grades and build up my strength. I know that I have to do dance but it will be the hardest not only physically but also emotionally. My mom and I were so invested in dance it was really who I was. I can’t let that stop me though mom would not want me to.

So I won't give up
No I won't break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong
Even if it all goes wrong
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe
Someone's watching over me

It doesn't matter what people say
And it doesn't matter how long it takes
Believe in yourself and you'll fly high
And it only matters how true you are
Be true to yourself and follow your heart

I also know that I have the support of my brothers and the Blackhawks team and now it seems the Penguins. This helps because it I know that there is always someone there to help me pick up the pieces if someone isn’t going right.

So I won't give up
No I won't break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong
Even if it all goes wrong
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe
That I won't give up
No I won't break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong
Even when it all goes wrong
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe
That someone's watching over
Someone's watching over
Someone's watching over me

Someone's watching over me
I am going to learn to be strong and to never give up. My parents would not want me to ever give up they would want me to go after my dreams. I am going to go after my dreams in honour of them but now I am also going to go after them for my self. They are watching over me and that will make me a stronger person.
I didn’t realise it but I had started crying somewhere is the song. When I finished I heard a burst of applause. I was floored I was completely speechless. I kind of just got up and walked back to the table. I got many “you were great”. But, all of a sudden I felt very drained and I just wanted to go home.
“Jon can we go home please” I whispered to him.
“Of course. You were amazing up there Mel. You left me and most of these out spoken guys speechless”
I was amazed I knew I had a voice but not one that would leave people speechless. I sang because I love it and I can express my self in ways dancing couldn’t.
When we got to the car, Jon helped me get in. On our way back home it was silent we were both exhausted but it was a comfortable silence. When we got home I said good night to Jonathan and gave him a hug then I went upstairs and changed into my pajamas. As soon as my head hit the pillow I was out for the count. I did have a pretty eventful day that tired me out.