The Wind Blows

"Ken."

"Yeah baby?" He mumbled softly, with his lips pressed into her dark hair, and his rough fingertips brushing across her skin beneath the baby blue covers that engulfed them.

She looked up into his hazel eyes, and saw the happiness - a smile that could be only brought by her.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

He pushed his warm lips against her forehead, and pulled her body closer as she struggled to muster up enough courage to ask him a question that was so private, she wasn't sure if it was something she should pursue.

"Does John ever show any interest in other girls?"

He pulled away from her warm body to look her dead in the eyes. But she shook her head, and waved him off, so that he wouldn't respond quiet yet, because she knew she had to explain further by the look on his face.

She sat up, causing his arms to fall from around her waist, and the blankets to gather at her hips. She carelessly ran a hand through her long dark hair, and let out a breath that was weighing her down.

"Anna - she has this crazy idea that John's sleeping around. She doesn't seem happy, and I - I don't know - maybe she's just paranoid," Dani shook her head softly, laughing bitterly, "maybe I'm just being stupid -"

"Dani," he rose to sit up next to her, pushing the wrinkled blankets away to gain some closure that would never really help, as he wrapped his long lanky arms around her shaking body, while she sat in a slump with her hand holding her head from falling any further.

He pressed a warm kiss to the back of her shoulder, and after tasting her soft skin he placed a few more kisses just to calm any unsettled nerves that might have been lingering inside.

"I'm worried about you," his nose pressed further into her pink skin, and all she could feel was the warm pattern of his breathing burning holes into her back with every breath his lungs slowly released.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled through tears, taking in a breath from the suffocating air, as she wipped away the beads of saline that stained her crimson cheeks with her fingers, and peeled his hands from her hips to hold them with her own.

She could feel his cheek pressed against her back, and could hear the subtle breaths pass his lips.

"You're the only one that I can talk to about this," she sniffled solemnly, and blinked several times to clear her scratchy eyes.

"I'm okay with that," he whispered so softly.

Starring at the blank wall, his arms wrapped tightly around her body, pulling so her back was pressed flush against his bare chest.

"I'll listen for as long as you want me to."

Dani stumbled blindly within the darkness, cursing beneath her breath every time she'd stump her toe on a piece of furniture - too sleepy to turn on the lights, and too tired to really care.

The consistent banging on the door was enough to fully wake her from her slumber. And if it weren't for the frantic boy behind the door, who pushed past her as the door opened, with his fingers knotted through his matted hair, and a look of panic washed over his face, she would've ignored it all together.

"John, what are you doing here," she wrapped her arms around her body, as she peered at the boy through half lidded eyes, "Its three in the morning."

His appearance was distraught, like he'd had one too many beers - his clothes were wrinkled, and his hair was disheveled - and all she could do was wait for him to speak.

She watched from a few steps away, as he ran a shaky hand through his tangled hair, and rolled his thin lips together, while mustering up something that was worth saying from his thoughts.

"I - I can't get her out of my head," he mumbled in gibberish, and then turned to the girl who appeared scared as she stood with her arms still tightly embracing her skin, "I can't stop thinking about her - and I can't stop thinking that I could've stopped her."

He grabbed a fist full of his hair with both hands, as frustration and regret struck him hard, "I'll never be able to let this go. It's always going to be like this isn't it," he peered up at Dani with a strain in his voice, "I'm always going to have this guilt - and I know there's nothing that I could've done, but - but I can't stop thinking that maybe there was. I can't let this go - and I can't let her go. And I don't know why, but sometimes I wish she'd taken me with her - sometimes I feel like things would've been better that way, because I'd still have her, and I'd still be with her - and this whole thing is just fucked up - everything about this is so fucked -"

His body was shaking in fits of anger as his scratchy eyes built up with nothing but beads of water.

And even though there was so much that could've been said, and needed to be spoken, she didn't speak - she only let her feet move her body in closer - letting her small arms wrap around his his lanky body, pulling him in closer to her. She knew his frustration, and she felt his pain every day, and every night - and she knew what it felt like when everything around you was falling down in circles.

And as his hands clutched tightly to the fabric of her clothing, and pulled her body as close as it would form against his own, she found herself no longer able to push back the tears that were covering her eyes, and ready to wash over her skin. Her ear was pressed to his chest, and all she could hear was their breathing, and the rapid pace of his heart beating against her eardrum.

"I miss her so much."

His words were mumbled through silent tears, with his thin lips pressed into her dark hair.

"Me too," she said softly against the fabric of his shirt, "She knew you loved her though."

He closed his eyes, tightly squeezing them shut, and hugged her body just a little tighter, "I'm not so sure she did."


"Anna, baby c'mon, just let me in - please."

He held his head low with his ear pressed closely to the door, listening carefully for any movement that might have been coming from behind it. But there was nothing - nothing but silence to be heard. He banged his fist a few more times against the sturdy surface, calling her name out into the thick air.

"Please baby - let's talk," his forehead fell against the door as his hand dragged down it's raw finish, "let's talk it out."

He stood up straight as he heard the lock turning, and rattling from the other side.

"John I don't think talking's going to make this all go away," she said through sobs of soaking tears.

But he ignored her words, and forced his way inside her room, grabbing her face with his hands to wipe away the tears that were staining her porcelain skin, with his thumbs. Her fingers clutched onto his wrists as her cold blue eyes peered up into his, and all he wanted to do was make it all better.

He barely kissed her full lips, but just enough to taste the saline that had washed over her mouth, but none of that really seemed to push him away. He pressed his lips to the sides of her face, and to the tip of her nose as she closed her soft blue eyes, and tried to stop the shaking of her knees.

"C'mon, please talk to me," he whispered softly with his mouth pushed against her ear, only to rush a wave of chills rush through her bones.

His hands pulled her in closer - till her head was pressed against his chest, and his arms were wrapped around her shoulders, as he pressed another kiss into her soft hair.

"Do you love me?," she mumbled softly against the sleeve of his shirt, hoping he wouldn't hear her - hoping he wouldn't feel her body shake against his as the words left her tongue.

"You know I always have."

She pushed out of his chest, and wiped the wet surface of her cheeks with her hands, before looking up at him with an expression that hurt worse than her words.

"Then why do I feel this way?" She asked without hesitation as her swollen eyes stared endless holes into his.

He just stared back, not letting his emotions get the better of him - and wanting nothing more than to pull the girl into his body, and hold her for as long as he could - that's all he wanted. But he didn't budge - he just looked hurt as he struggled to pretend that her words didn't affect him, when they felt like claws raking over his heart.

And as he moved closer, and brushed a few hairs away from her blue eyes with his fingertips, he could see the unhappiness that had been drained from her existence. His arms pulled her in close - her body getting lost in the depths of his.

"I want to make you happy for as long as I can," he whispered softly, and pressed his thin lips against her forehead, "and I swear I'll prove to you that there's nothing more you'll ever need."

"I dream about her all the time," John whispered into the silence of the dark room, as he lightly combed his fingers through the hair of the girl whose head was resting on his stomach.

"You do?" Her green eyes were focusing on the white ceiling that was hidden above - trying to uncover it from the blackness of the night. But her eyes were too tired to keep themselves from falling any longer.

"Yeah - I dream about the things we never had a chance to do - sometimes it's my only way of getting to her."

"I wish I'd have dreams like that," she said softly, inhaling the clean air, and letting it out along with the pain that was still trapped inside her heart, "I have nightmares, you know"

She paused, and listened to see if he'd respond, but when no reply was obtained, and there was only quietness she continued to tell him about the stories she'd have when she'd fall asleep at night.

"Sometimes in my dreams - when I see her, she - she has blood falling down her face, and she's looking at me, and calling out my name - but I can never reach her. And other times she's telling me she's sorry - sorry for leaving me," Dani shrugged her shoulders lightly at the familiar thoughts, "Sometimes I'm too scared to fall asleep at night."

"You shouldn't have to be scared," he whispered, as he drug his long fingers through her soft dark hair once more, and watched as she raised her head from his stomach, and sat up beside him on the navy colored comforter.

"I feel like she's always beside me - watching me," she whispered quietly as she laid her head down on the pillow next to his, "I'm always afraid I'm letting her down if I do something wrong."

He rolled his body over, across the sheets, letting his green eyes fall over hers. "That's not fair to you, you know," he paused letting his eyes fall from hers before looking back up, "I think Anna would've wanted you to live your life the way you want to."

Dani vaguely nodded her head against the pillow at his words, and watched as he closed his tired eyes for rest.

"John."

"Yeah?" He mumbled through his lips, with his eyes still closed.

"I'm scared to fall asleep."

He opened his eyes, and looked at the girl through the darkness, finding nothing but fear hidden within her glassy green orbs. She looked drained, and exhausted , liked she'd been avoiding sleep for too long now, so she wouldn't have to see the things she didn't want to when her eyes shut - the images of Anna, and the screams in her head.

And even though he'd lied, he knew better than anyone why she tried to avoid any form of rest long after the sun went down.

He reached out, and draped his arm over her hips, feeling her tense at the sudden contact, but that didn't stop him from pulling her closer to him. And as he looked into the depths of her eyes, and pressed his thin lips to her forehead, he let his words try, and give her the peace that she'd been searching for.

"You don't have to be scared tonight."