My Own Glory

The locker room was silent. It was last intermission. The team was down by one and with only twenty minutes left in the game, Maddi was starting to get worried. In past years, the team always had a comfortable lead. But the other team was destined to knock down the reigning champs.

“We need to get our heads in the game. We had them in the first period. We need to play like that again. If a team is going to beat us, we’re not going down without a fight. Seniors, lead this team. Make it four in a row. The school, your families, your teammates are counting on you. Don’t let this be the end. Now let’s go out there and show them who the state champs are!”

The team erupted in “hell yeahs!” Everyone stood and gathered in the middle, fists in the air and with one last cheer, they marched back onto the ice ready to bring this game to an end with a victory.

Maddi was tired. She had never felt so defeated before in her life. She was playing hard, doing everything she could to score but the other team shut her down. She had no breathing room and was left with only one assist. This wasn’t like her. She could push pass any barrier any team put up but today was different.

She had woken up with a bad feeling. She didn’t know why or what made her unsettled but it was the worse time to have it. She couldn’t shake off this feeling or explain it to Jeremy when he asked. And it haunted her as the minutes ticked down in the game. Were they going to lose? Was she going to get hurt? Was Jeremy going to get hurt? She didn’t know and she was losing time.

“Maddi, you’re up! Go!” Coach called out, shaking Maddi from her daze. She hopped over the wall and onto the ice and down with her teammates toward their opponents goal. Jeremy and Mark passed her the puck, jumping ahead to get closer. Maddi worked the puck with ease. Nothing felt out of place. So what was her problem?

“Maddi look out!” She lifted her head and saw a defenseman coming her way and slamming her against the wall. She hastily passed the puck getting it as far away from the defenseman as she could.

Maddi landed on the ice with a hard hit. She slowly got up, watching Jeremy pick up the puck and heading for the goal. The goalie had no chance at stopping Jeremy’s slap shot. It was hard and fast, hitting the netting with a ‘swish’. The lamp lit up and the team jumped on Jeremy in celebration. They’re tied. One more goal and they win.

“Are you alright?” Jeremy asked Maddi once they got back to the bench. He’d seen her get hit and, unlike her usual self, she didn’t jump up and get back into the game.

“Yeah I’m fine. Nice shot.” She replied, pumping fists with him.

Jeremy smirked, “Nice pass.”

“There he is! There’s the MVP!!” The room shouted and cheered as Jeremy walked into Mark’s place. The party was in full swing by the time he and Maddi got there. The team had ended up winning the game by one, Jeremy scoring the winning goal and racking up a hat trick.

“What took ya so long to get here?” Mark asked, patting his captain on the back and handing him a red solo cup.

“Had to stop for gas.” He lied.

”Jeremy I really don’t wanna go.”

“Why not? We just won! You have to go.” He argued.

Maddi crossed her arms, “I don’t have to go anywhere.”

“Babe, you gotta go. You’re their captain. What are they gonna think if you don’t show up?”

“ ‘Good, cuz she almost cost us the game’?”

“Madison,” Jeremy wrapped his arms around his girlfriend, one hand brushing a fly-away behind her ear, “You didn’t cost us the game. We won. You made assists. You played great.”

“I’ve played better.”

“You’re allowed to play bad every once in a while. You’re not Sidney Crosby.”

Maddi didn’t look at her boyfriend the entire ride to Mark’s. She couldn’t believe he had said that, especially after knowing who Sidney was to her. He wasn’t just her uncle, he was a father figure, and he was a coach, a trainer. She looked up to him especially when it came to hockey. She did want to be like Sidney on the ice.

Once they walked into the house, Maddi and Jeremy separated. Maddi found comfort with her three girlfriends and the beer they handed her. It didn’t take long for the three amigos to feel that negative vibe coming from Maddi. She had explained what happened between Jeremy and her. Of course the girls were on Maddi’s side and just poured a little bit more alcohol in her cup. That had been the same for the next several hours at the party. Music played, alcohol poured, pictures were taken, and Maddi was able to forget about the game and Jeremy for enough time to realize she had over reacted, “I’m gonna go find Jeremy.” She told her friends. They waved her off, their attentions on their hockey crushes.

Madison scanned every room in the house but there was no sign of Jeremy or his friends on the team. Had he left? He can’t leave, he’s my ride home.

Boisterous laughter came from the deck in the back. Checking it out, Maddi could see Jeremy’s back to the door. As she was opening it, she could hear him talking in between laughs, “You should see all the stuff she has. There’s an entire room full of signed jerseys.”

“I wish Sidney Crosby could be my uncle. All the chicks I could pick up with that kind of name dropping, damn.”

“And you’re tapping that? I haven’t seen her with any other dude. Fuck man, you get to pop the cherry.” A guy on the team stated.

“No dude.” Jeremy earned a group groan, “Shut up! I was waiting for the right time.”

“Have you gotten anything?” Jeremy shook his head, “Dude, go find a girl and relax. You gotta let that out and there are plenty of chicks in there that would be happy to be of service.”

Maddi stood shocked. Jeremy never responded.

“Jer, just go and take Maddi upstairs. You can’t deny fucking a Crosby.”

SLAM!!!

In a rush of tears, Madison pushed through the crowd to the front of the house. She ignored the whispers and the people calling her name. She had to get out.

“Sidney? Can you come get me?” She asked into the phone. She knew Sidney would get here as fast as possible. Who else could she call? Sidney wouldn’t make a scene like Kris or Jordan, if he was still around.

Jeremy’s words played through her head over and over. Was that all he wanted? Was it the only reason he stuck around after she confided in him? Why else would a guy be with her? So he could get the luxuries of a Crosby; go to the games, meet other women, and the ability to brag that he fucked a Crosby.

Was this what she was feeling the entire day? That bad feeling wasn’t about the game; it was about her relationship with Jeremy. If she had known that hour before, she would have refused to come to the party. She wouldn’t have heard any of that. But would he listen to his friends and cheat on her?

Sidney’s SUV came to a screeching halt in front of the house Maddi told him. He had never slammed his car door before and with the power behind his action, he thought it was going to come off. But there were more important things to worry about.

“Madison, what happened?” He asked. Maddi crashed into his open arms, her tears staining his Penguins sweatshirt.

“Just take me home.” She cried.

“Maddi!” Jeremy’s voice rang out from the front door with several other guys on the team. They stopped just as Sidney’s car when they saw the Penguins Captain cradling his niece. “Maddi I’m sorry.” He tried to say, but Sidney was pulling her into the car.

Jeremy couldn’t take his eyes off the girl he’d fallen for drive away with tears streaming down her face. He knew what was being said out on the deck and, maybe, the alcohol was keeping him from speaking up. He knew the guys were joking. He would never cheat on Maddi, he cared too much about her. But he didn’t realize that by not saying anything, he was hurting her. He didn’t know she was behind him, listening in. And if he thought he had a chance to make it right, that certainly wasn’t going to happen, especially if Sidney Crosby has anything to say about it.

As soon as she got home, Madison ran up to her room, shutting the door. Sidney was furious. He had never wanted to yell and scream at someone as much as he did to the boy that broke Maddi’s heart.

Against his own rules, Sidney cracked open a beer and stayed in the kitchen, his elbows resting against the countertop. He racked through his brain all the connections he has and the favors he could ask those people.

“Sidney?” That lovely voice relaxed the tense Captain on his chair. Danni walked up beside Sidney, a hand on his back, rubbing the tight muscles, “What happened? You stormed out of here without a word.”

“Maddi called for me to pick her up from that party. When I got there she was in tears. Tears, Danni! I haven’t seen her in tears since she was a little girl. And when Jeremy came out for her, she couldn’t move fast enough to the car. I knew that boy was going to be a problem!”

“Where is she now?”

“Her room. I just let her go. I didn’t know what to do.” He rubbed his face.

Danni kissed his temple, “It’s alright. You’re new to this.”

“If this one turns out to be a girl, I’m making an arranged marriage. I’m picking the guy and she won’t be able to date him till she’s thirty.”

“Oh stop it. If you’re daughter as to go throw, then so will your sons. We’ll talk to Maddi in the morning. Now finish your beer and go to bed.” Sidney kissed Danni’s hands and let her go back upstairs, one hand holding her back and the other rubbing her growing stomach. He couldn’t stop the smile spreading on his lips. He found the love of his life and she had given him everything he ever wanted. If there was a woman that’ll keep him in check, it was Danni. She could remain level-headed, all while working and managing several Tim Hortons, taking care of four, soon five, children, and keeping the family and Sidney’s schedule organized and remembered. She was Superwoman in her own way.

The next morning no one knocked on Maddi’s door. She had remained in bed with a box of tissues nearby. Any picture of her and Jeremy were taken down and hidden. Her phone had been off since she left the party. She could only imagine the messages and number of calls that awaited her once she turned that device back on.

“Knock, knock.” The soft voice of her aunt said as she walked with the amazing smell of waffles and bacon; Maddi’s favorite.

Liam and Aiden helped open the door for their mother while Owen held onto a glass of orange juice with both hands, “Hi Maddi.” Owen said.

Maddi sat up, her nose red and her eyes puffy, “Oh guys!”

“The boys heard you weren’t feeling well and they wanted to make you breakfast.” Danni explained setting the tray down on Maddi’s lap.

“It’s chocolate chip! Mommy said you needed chocolate.”

“Yes, I do need chocolate. Thank you guys.” Maddi kissed her cousins before they left. Danni stayed behind, sitting down beside her niece with that motherly look on her face. Maddi let out a sigh, “Boys are assholes.” The tears that stopped started back up again as Danni hugged Maddi.

“Aw sweetie, what happened?”

“I overheard Jeremy telling his friends that I was Sidney’s niece and they were asking him if we slept together and when he said no they told him to find another girl to sleep with or try and do it with me because then he could go around saying he slept with a Crosby.” Maddi explained, sniffing and catching her breath.

“Well it’s a good thing Sidney didn’t come in here. It’s alright baby. Have you heard from Jeremy?”

“No, I turned my phone off.”

“I’m sorry baby.”

“I shouldn’t have told him! I knew something like this was going to happen! I was afraid this was going to happen and it did and he promised me he wouldn’t do it but he did and I don’t think I could ever, ever forgive him.”

“I know Maddi. I understand. It’s okay.”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“He made a mistake and I’m sure he knows it. I’m just going to assume he probably was drinking. He might not have known what was really going on, I don’t know. You might have to hear him out.”

Maddi laughed, “That’s if Sidney lets him within a 100 radius of me. You should have seen Sid’s face last night. I don’t think he’s ever looked at Ovi like that.”

“I know. I heard him mumbled something about a restraining order and ‘not even CSI could find him’. You’ll figure it out babygirl. You do what’s right to you.” Danni kissed the top of Maddi’s head and left her alone.

Her phone on the side table was tormenting her. She wanted to know what Jeremy had to say for himself but she was scared to hear it. What if he meant it? But maybe he didn’t. There was only one way to find out…

Maddi I’m so so so sososososo sorry. I didn’t mean anything I said. Those guys are assholes. I’m sorry baby, please call me back. I need to talk to you.”

“Maddi, hey what’s going on? You just ran out of the party without saying anything. Sarah said she saw you crying. What happened? Give me a call. We’re worried about you.” Tina left the second voicemail.

“Come on Maddi, answer the phone. Please stop ignoring me. We need to talk about this. It was a misunderstanding. Please, I have to talk to you.” Jeremy left several more messages like that. On top of Maddi’s other friends leaving voicemails and text messages for her.

A lot of people had contacted her trying to figure out what happened and making sure she was okay. Even some of the guys on the team who had been talking about her with Jeremy messaged her. She could punch every one of them if she could. She didn’t want to see them again. It didn’t help that the most important game of their high school careers was in a week. She had to see them. She wanted that championship just as much as the next guy.

Suddenly she wasn’t hungry. The waffles got cold and she tossed them in her garbage, not wanting to insult the boy’s effort to make her feel better. She didn’t want them worrying about her and her boy problems; they were too young for that. Maddi changed into a not-as-smelly outfit and emerged from the stench infested bedroom. Descending down the stairs she could hear numerous voices coming from the living room.

“Maddi, is that you?” She heard Sidney call out.

“Umm…yeah. What’s…going on?” She asked turning into the living room and seeing a crowd of people.

“Can you take a seat? We want to talk to you.” Hestiantly, Maddi walked through the crowd of Penguin players in her living room and sat on the couch.

“Mon amour!”

“Max? Jordan? Eric? Ovi? What is going on?”

Lined up in front of the couch was Sidney in the middle, flanking him on both sides was Kris, Marc-Andre, James, Tyler, and Max. On the coffee table were three laptops; Ovi, Jordan with Eric, and Jonathan Toews with Patrick Kane.

“Max…you’re in your pajamas…?”

“As soon as I heard I drove over.”

“Sid, what’s going on?”

“Madison, we want to talk to you about boys.” In the corner of the room were the various wives of each one of the men present, and gathered together with coffee mugs in their hands.

“Aunt Danni?”

Danni held up her hands, “I didn’t say a word. Hockey players gossip worse than old women.”

“Maddi, we all love and care about you. And we’re sorry about what happened last night between you and Jeremy.”

“How you not tell me?” Alex Ovchkin asked, a hand over his hurt heart.

“I didn’t realize I needed to update the NHL about my relationship status.”

“Mon amour, we care about you and it hurts us to see you hurt.” Max comforted her, sitting beside her on the couch and rubbing her back.

“I know you guys do.”

“And we’ve come up with a plan to hurt this boy just as much as he hurt you.” Tyler informed.

Jordan spoke up, “When we’re finished with him he won’t ever play in the NHL.”

“No, guys,” Maddi pulled away from Max looking at each man that has taken a fatherly role in her life, “It’s my problem. Don’t go talking to people about this. Jeremy…Jeremy’s a good hockey player. He should be in the NHL. But relationship wise, I’m supposed to get back at him, which I’m not,” The guys groaned and complained, “Guys, please. Thank you for being there but I have to handle this on my own.”

Over the disagreement in the living room, the doorbell rang, “I’ll get it.” Danni told the other wives, handing Jenny her mug.

On the other side of the door was the poor boy walking into hisown death trap, “Jeremy?” Danni stepped forward, closing the door slightly behind her, “What are you doing here?”

“I need to see Maddi. I need to talk to her.”

“Now is not a good time—“

“Is she okay? Please Mrs. C I need to see her.”

Jeremy’s eye averted to the door opening behind Danni. Maddi stood there, mixed emotions playing on her face, “Jeremy?”

“Maddi I’m so so sorry.”

“This isn’t a good time.”

“I only need a minute. Just let me explain, please!”

“Maddi, we’re not done…what’s he doing here?”

“Sid, let’s let them talk.”

“She doesn’t have anything to say to him.”

“Sidney.” Danni said sternly.

“Fine…but five minutes and I’m back out here with the rest of them.”

“The rest of them?”

“You don’t wanna know.” Maddi mumbled.

“Look Maddi, last night…it was a mistake. Those guys were drunk. They didn’t know what they were talking about.”

“And you did. You didn’t say anything to stop them or object or nothing!”

“They were just joking.”

“It sure didn’t sound like it. Did you actually think about sleeping with some other girl?”

“No! Never! Maddi,” He took hold of her hands, “I would never ever do that. I would never hurt you.”

“Yeah, well you did.” She ripped her hands from his and grabbed for the doorknob, “We’re done Jeremy. Go sleep with whoever you want.”

“Maddi, please!”

Sidney waited by the door, his eyes on his watch as the hands ticked down to five minutes. When the door opened, he stepped forward as Jeremy did. No one was going to hurt his girl. He made an emphasis by slamming the door, making sure the lock bolt was heard from down the road.

Danni shook her head, “Was that really necessary?”

Jeremy’s head fell. That couldn’t be it. He didn’t want it to end. This was never supposed to happen. Even after hearing the bolt lock, he had this sudden urge to pound on the door and talk to Madison, but the several angry looks poking from behind the curtain told him otherwise.

I’ll get her back. I will fix this.

Since the break-up, the days felt like years. Maddi had grown tired, barley able to perform at practice, she couldn’t keep her eyes open during class, and any food that was placed in front of her made her sick. There were several times Danni had to sit with Maddi and force her to eat like a five year old. She never slept at night, instead her mind raced with so many thoughts. Most of them were about Jeremy.

She saw him every day. There was no where she could go that she didn’t see him or be reminded of him. He looked just as miserable as her. Good.

The team had won their next set of games, the finals being only a week away. Maddi barely played, not that she blamed the coach for not playing her. She wouldn’t put her in with the way she was playing. Sidney became more worried when she didn’t want to watch film or practice with him. But he couldn’t heal her broken heart. No one could, except one person.

“If you’re a girl and you get out of there, no boys. I don’t want to see another one of my girls have a broken heart.” Sidney told Danni belly, “And if you’re a boy…I’ll smack you if you break a girl’s heart.”

Danni smiled, “You tell ‘em, babe.”

“I’m really worried about Maddi.”

“We all are, Sid. Even the boys want to make her happy. But her heart’s been broken. That’s hard to cure.”

“Think if I buy her a new car or some jewelry it’ll help?” Sidney asked.

“I don’t think so. But good try.”

The Crosby’s had walked on egg shells when they were around Madison; afraid that the slightest thing might trigger the wrong emotion. Maddi knew this. But she didn’t say anything. They gave her space and Maddi appreciated it.

Her friends on the other hand had done everything they could to make Maddi happy. They talked back about Jeremy but deep down Maddi knew none of it was true. The fact that Jeremy was truly a good guy made it hard to hate him. She wanted him back, she wanted to be in his arms again but she didn’t know if she could do it. She wanted to go to prom with him.

Prom…if there was something on her mind, prom probably was one of them. She was hard at work getting her tasks done once the girls settled on a theme: Red and Gold. The school’s colors in honor of the seniors on the hockey team. Seeing as the school was a hockey school and the seniors had won many championships all through high school, it seemed appropriate. Win or lose the team would be highlighted at the event.

As of today, Maddi was attending the event alone. She was tempted to not even go, but Sarah, Mary, and Tina would have her head if she didn’t.

The house was quiet with the boys out and about with their mom. Maddi assumed that Sidney was somewhere relaxing before his busy weekend. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to be in the quiet house but where would she go? What would she do? Maddi sat there in the living room just thinking of anything she could do to keep her mind off of subjects she tried to forget.

The finals game was tomorrow. She wanted nothing more than her last victory and she wanted to play well. She knew scouts were going to be watching from schools and even the pros. But they probably won’t want to see her. Not when a player like Jeremy is on the team.

I can’t even think about hockey without Jeremy coming up.

Maddi let out a groan. There had to be something she could do. She glanced around the living room. Looking at everything Danni had put on display. Family pictures surrounded her. Pictures of the boys, of the family, of the team, there was even one of Maddi and her mother so long ago. But the one picture that she loved was the first picture a person would see once they walked into the room.

It was a large portrait of Danni and Sidney in their wedding. Maddi remembers that moment so well. It was just after they were introduced as husband and wife, the music began to play and Sidney took Danni into his arms for their first dance. Maddi can remember the way they looked into each other’s eyes. Even to this day, that same spark happens every time they look at each other. When will I ever get that spark?

Sidney had started to get worried when no noise rang through the house. He hadn’t realized Danni took the boys out. He found Maddi sitting alone in the living room in silence, starring at the portrait on the wall, one of his favorite, “I remember that day like it was yesterday.” He said, startling his niece.
“I do too.” Sidney walked over to the couch sitting beside her.

“I can’t tell you how many times I stare at that picture.”

“It’s beautiful.”

“I couldn’t tell you a happier time than that day. I got to marry the love of my life and adopt such a fantastic little girl.” He told her, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

“When did you know?”

“Know what?”

“That you were in love with Aunt Danni?”

Maddi looked up at Sidney. She was expecting some kind of confusing face but in place was a smile that only few saw. His eyes glistened, playing the time back in his mind as if he thought about it every day, “I realized I fell in love with your aunt, when I couldn’t wait to get out of practice. Before you guys, I could have stayed on the ice for days. All I wanted was to be perfect, and hockey was the only place I could do that. I lived and breathed it. But once I met you two, I found there was more to live for. And I haven’t regretted my decision. I’m blessed with a beautiful wife who has given me three beautiful children, one more on the way, and you.”

Maddi’s eyes turned back to the portrait on the wall. There was more on her mind then she was letting on. Danni usually handled this type of stuff but seeing as she was MIA, “What’s wrong Maddi?”

She sighed, “I think I made a mistake.”

“About what?”

“Jeremy…I think I overreacted; didn’t give him a chance to explain.”

“And you…miss him?”

“I don’t know, maybe? Uncle Sid, I don’t know what to do.”

“Maybe we should call Vero…”

“Uncle Sid!”

“Okay, okay…well, I guess you should talk to him, let him explain, and you can figure out from there if you’ve made a mistake.”

“I don’t think he’ll want to talk to me. I haven’t been the greatest towards him.”

“I don’t blame ya. But if you really like this kid…let him explain.” Maddi looked up at her uncle. Sidney wouldn’t be the first person she would go to for dating advice, but she knows that he’ll always be there for her.

The school was covered with its colors in support of the team. Today was the final game. The final game of the season, and the final game for the seniors. No one has been able to knock the champs from the top and this year will be no different.

Maddi couldn’t sit still all day. In class, her mind was everywhere but the blackboard. She was nervous. Not about the game, the same game she’s played for years, but nervous about talking to Jeremy. She couldn’t go on the ice with this on her mind. Maddi had it all planned out. She knew when and where she would talk to him, hopefully she could remember what she planned to say.

At the final bell, every student rushed to their lockers before heading out for pregame. The team was the only one that headed to the locker room for a different kind of pregame. Maddi waited outside the boy’s locker room until she saw Jeremy at the back of the group, “Jeremy?” He paused, seeing Maddi standing there, her hands fidgeting.

“I’ll be right there guys.”

Once the team went inside, Maddi headed towards the girls locker room, Jeremy in tow. He hesitated going into the locker room until Maddi said, “No one’s in here.”

Jeremy watched her. She seemed nervous, scared almost. Maddi wouldn’t look him in the eyes and it hurt. He wanted to speak first but he needed her to start.

“Jeremy…I, I want to…apologize. For everything. I overreacted and was an idiot—“

“Maddi, stop, don’t apologize. You don’t have too. I messed up and I’m sorry. If I could take it all back I would.”

“But I didn’t let you explain. I didn’t give you a chance to tell me I was overacting.”

“And I shouldn’t have said what I did that night. I shouldn’t have let those guys say those things. You have every right to be upset at me and I want nothing more than for you to forgive me. I’d want us to go back to the way it was but…I’d understand if you don’t.”

“I’d rather be friends.” Her answer twisted the knife in Jeremy’s heart just as much as it hurt Maddi to say it. She had thought it over. It wouldn’t be right to be with Jeremy again seeing as in only a few short months, the two of them would be separated and starting new lives in different states.

“As long as we can talk again.” He smiled, causing Maddi to grin. “Come on, we have a game to win.”

And win they did. Maddi felt nothing as sweet as her final victory. It was like slow motion. The way the crowd erupted when the final buzzer went off. Her team had gathered with their goalie, who let no goals in by the other team, and hugged each other. This meant so much too so many and they were able to achieve it as a team, the same team for the past four years.

This must be what Sidney felt like after winning the Cup. Though winning the Cup and a high school state championship is very different, but that feeling of accomplishment, of making everyone proud was amazing.

Maddi looked over at her family’s section. Sidney and Danni stood cheering with their children whose faces were painted school colors. Some of the guys on the Penguins and their wives watched with just as much happiness as her own family.

Tina, Mary, and Sarah cheered with the rest of the team in the student section. Even her teachers yelled with excitement. Everything felt like a dream.

Jeremy rushed over to Maddi, lifting her off her feet and spinning her around. They’ve just accomplished the greatest award in high school sports award. It’s only going to lead to bigger and better things for them.

The team was given the trophy and their banner. Many pictures flashed as the players surrounded the captain and his alternatives as they held the banner with wide smiles. T-shirts were made and rings were promised before the end of the year.

Maddi looked over the arena and let out a sigh. She had accomplish so many trials, made many errors and could walk away with proof that she had overcome it all.

Looking up at the many rafters above the ice, her guardian angel had the best seat in the house. She’d been there the whole time; every game, every laugh and every cry. Maddi brought her hand to her lips, sending a kiss to her mother above.

Danni had watched the loving gesture from her goddaughter and couldn’t help the tear that passed. Danni talked to Addie every day and knew she was present every moment of Maddi’s life.

Sidney placed a hand on his wife’s shoulder. He knew his girl better than anyone and though he never knew Addie, he knew if she was here right now she’d be hugging Danni before celebrating with her little girl. And as he looked at his niece across the ice, seeing the number 9 and Johnson written across the back, he and everyone else, knew Madison was her mother and though Addie wasn’t there physically, she will always be within her daughter.