You Got Me Poppin Champagne

ERIN'S POV

"It was okay, right? It sounded good? You like it?" I rolled my eyes as Alex asked again and again if the new single was worth the wait. Were the fans reactions not enough? Seriously, did that not tell a guy that his band's music was good enough?

"Yes, Alex, it was wonderful and perfect and amazing and sounded like So Wrong It's Right, Nothing Personal and Dirty Work had a threesome."

The answering look I received from him made me chuckle. "Did you really just say that?"

"Yes, I did, and eyes on the road!" Alex was currently driving us to our mystery location for our date. I knew better than to ask where we were going, because there was no way he was gonna tell me anyway. But I really didn't care what we did because in all honesty, being with him was enough. "Besides, it wasn't even me who came up with that. It was a fan on twitter. I just thought it pretty much summed it all up. But you're happier with this record, right?"

Alex nodded, and his lips turned up at the corners. "Yeah, it feels more like us. More like All Time Low. We're not producing an album to get on the radio, you know? We're doing it for us. Well, the fans as well, but you know what I mean."

I smiled and kissed his cheek as he drove. "Yeah, I know what you mean. and you seem happier for it."

His smile grew, and the warmth that came with that filled my heart and the cold air surrounding us. "That's not the only thing that made me happy. You did too. You and Jasey. And the twins." As he said that last part he looked over at me, smiling, and placed a hand on my bump.

There was barely any time to register the guilt I felt before I heard the screech of tires and felt the harsh motion of two cars impacting, the penetrating noises seeming distant before I drifted into a place of tranquility.

ALEX'S POV

"I'm fine, okay, I'm just dandy, now let me go see my fucking wife."

There were about a group of five surrounding me, all asking me to go take a seat, telling me I needed to be checked over, ordering me to calm down, just a frenzy of voices. My eyes were focused on the tall doctor with greying hair and a face filled with collected experience.

"Sir, please, your wife needn't be put under any more strain than is already on her. I promise you, the minute she wakes, you will be notified. She seems to be lucky in that we can see nothing alarming at this point. It sounds as if you both had a very lucky escape. Must be a safe car." Some part of me managed a condescending laugh in reply to the doctor.

"We have a daughter. It has to be safe."

The doctor nodded. "True. Now please, sit down, let the nurses see to you. We're doing our very best to make sure Mrs, Gaskarth is the most comfortable she can be. The most important thing is her health right now, don't you agree?" I nodded in defeat. "Well then. You let us do our job, we'll look after her. I promise."

Just as the doctor walked away from me, I called out to him. "And the babies?"

The doctor turned, seemingly confused. "Sorry?"

"The babies. She's pregnant with twins. You'll look after them too, right?" I knew they would, you know, like the rational part of my brain registered that. But the rest of me? The rest of me was too hyped up with nerves and anxiety and plain damn right fear. And that huge part of me needed assurance. Because I couldn't lose any of my family. We almost lost Jasey, I refused to lose anything else.

He had a funny look on his face but smiled small and replied with "Of course," and that was that. He walked off to see to Erin and the nurses sorted me out, just giving me a couple of stitches and an ice pack, settling me down while every part of me felt alive and jumpy and the slightest movement set me off.

Eventually I was allowed to move to one of those hard plastic seats in a waiting area that really did nothing to help people as anxious as I was.

"Daddy!" My head snapped up and turned to the right. I knew that voice. And sure enough, there she was. Jasey with her little legs, not quite sturdy yet, waddling as fast as she could towards me. I fell to my knees, off the seat, and embraced her as soon as she reached me, allowing the tears I had been trying to hide, fall into her soft hair. Her hair that was almost as light as Erin's but not quite. I felt her put her arms around my neck and grip my own hair, because that was all she could do. She didn't understand what was happening, she didn't understand why her daddy was crying, she didn't understand why I seemed so broken. I'd already lost Erin once, not again. I couldn't lose her again.

"Alex," another familiar voice said gently. I looked up to see Jack, smiling sympathetically. "Allie's at home with Shane, we couldn't both come and I figured it wouldn't be best to have a baby around here, and Allie said you would need me more than you needed her, so I came."

I nodded at my best friend and sat back down on one of those awfully cold hospital chairs. Jack sat beside me and I held Jasey close to me on my lap. I wasn't letting her go for the world. "Thanks for bringing her. I don't think I could have just sat here without someone. And if the worst happens...well Jasey should be here to say goodbye-"

"Alex, stop it," Jack told me sternly. I turned to look him in the eye. "You don't know what's gonna happen. Did the doctor say it was bad?"

I shook my head. "No, he said we were both real lucky and that there didn't seem to be anything extremely worrying or whatever."

"Exactly. It's gonna be okay, I think they'd have told you if they were really worried."

I sighed at his logic. "I know, I know, I'm just being stupid, but she's pregnant Jack! You remember what almost happened last time! I can't go through that again!"

"Alex, listen to me. Everything is going to be all right. Erin is going to be all right. The twins are going to be all right. You'll be all right." I looked at Jack once more, to see him smiling a small sad smile at me, and placed a hand on my shoulder. "You're not gonna lose anyone else."

I returned the pathetic excuse for a smile. "Fuck, Jack, when did you get so mature?"

"When I finally got rid of my Herpes."

That got a little chuckle out of me. "You sure do know how to ruin a moment"

He rolled his eyes at me. "Well duh, we're dudes, not chicks. Dudes aren't supposed to have moments."

I smiled a little more at him. "Yeah, sure, but for what it's worth, if dudes did have moments, I'd probably tell you how much of a great friend you've been, and how thankful I am to have a friend like you, even if you are a jerk who makes too many dick jokes."

"Ah, don't worry about it. I'd probably tell you not to worry about it, and I only waste my time on people I know are worth it. Even if you are a pampered little baby princess."

"Thanks dude, I appreciate it, really, now where did you put my hairspray you little bitch?"

Jack grinned at me. "See! That's the spirit! But you really need to watch your language in front of Jasey. You know Erin'll get mad."

I sighed and looked down at my daughter who was half asleep as she sat on my lap with my arms around her. "I know. God, Jack, this was all my fault."

"Well yeah, you didn't wear a condom. But as a mistake goes, I think Jasey is a pretty good one-"

I shook my head. "No, that;s not what I mean. This, the hospital, Erin being in there, the crash, it was all my fault. I was the one driving, I was the one who took my eyes off the road, it was supposed to be a date for us before tour, but I ruined it. I looked away for like a second and now this happened...I'm putting Jasey through too much. Putting Erin through too much, it was all my fault. I'm supposed to keep them safe, I'm supposed to protect them, but I can't even do that right! I hurt them. I hurt them too much. It's my fault. It's all my fault. Everything is my fault. I took my eyes off the road. I did it, Jack. it's my fault."

"Alex, Alex stop, just stop. Calm down."

"She's in there because of me Jack, I hurt her. I took my eyes off the road. I did it Jack, it was all my fault."

"Alex, seriously, stop, it's not your fault." I heard what he was saying, but it didn't go through properly. Nothing was really registering.

"Stop it."

"I did it though, it's all my fault. I put her in this damn hospital! It's all my fucking fault!" And with that more tears fell, and when Jack realised I was crying, he put his arm around me and I cried on his shoulder. I really didn't care about what people thought. I just needed a friend right now, and Jack was here. While my heart was being torn out and stamped on, Jack was here, willing to help me pick it back up and piece it together. But first I just needed to get it all out.

After a while of me just crying, silence washed over me and there were no more tears left to fall from my tired sore eyes.

Finally, Jack spoke. "Sometimes bad things happen to good people. You made a mistake. That's human. It doesn't make you a bad person."

I really couldn't think of how to reply, so I just stared at the ground. "Thanks," I eventually replied.

Jack slapped my back. "No problem. And I called Rian and Zack and we all agree that if you need to, we can push the tour back. I'm pretty sure the fans would understand. I called Matt and he said if we need to, different arrangements can be made."

I smiled at the gesture, but knew I had to turn it down. "No, Erin wouldn't want that. She'd kill me."

"Are you sure? Because if things go bad then-"

"You said everything is gonna be fine, so it'll be fine right? And I can go on tour with no problem, right?" I looked into Jack's eyes, pleading and desperate for someone to tell me I wasn't going to lose everything.

He smiled at me sadly and put a hand on my shoulder. "Right."

ERIN'S POV

"I'm so sorry, but-"

"I know," I replied to the doctor who didn't quite know how to break the news. "I know. Five months, right?"

He nodded in sympathy. "I'm sorry. I know how hard this must be for you."

I smiled small and played with my hands. "I just wanted to pretend for a little while longer. Just...don't tell my husband."

The doctor cocked his head at me. "Excuse me? Why don't you want your husband to know?"

I looked up at the doctor with sad eyes. "Because I can't have his heart breaking."

The doctor nodded, a little in understanding, a little in sympathy. "Do you want me to call him in now? You've been very lucky."

"Doesn't feel that way, but yeah, I wanna see him."

The doctor nodded again and left the room to find Alex. While I was laying in the hospital bed, surrounded by nothing but the sharp beeping of various machines, I had a little time to think about everything. Alex was going on tour tomorrow. So I wouldn't have to pretend much more. I had to see this through. They told me there was no other way, so even if I told him, there wouldn't be much we could do about it. I just had to carry on as I had. I felt moisture on my cheek and realised I was crying. I sighed shakily. Damn hormones. Then again, I doubt this was just hormones.

I placed a hand on my bulging stomach and smiled a little when I felt a familiar kick beneath my hand. "Mommy's here, it's all gonna be okay. I promise, I'll make it okay."

Just then, Alex burst through the door in a frenzy, Jack not far behind him, holding Jasey so that Alex could hug me tightly to him. "Oh god, Erin, I'm so sorry, I'm so so sorry, this was all my fault, I promise I won't let anything happen to you like this again, I mean it this time. Fuck, Erin, I'm so sorry. I love you so much."

I cried a little as I clung to Alex and he stroked my hair. "I know, and I love you too." I bit my lip while Alex couldn't see my face, and as I held onto him, I silently apologised with all my heart for the pain that I was soon to cause him.