I Want To Know Your Plans

I walked down the aisle on Mike’s arm. We both wore great, big smiles. His genuine, mine plastic.

“Charlie, easy does it….Just look at me. Not at them, okay? Don’t watch it.” Mike said through his smile. I nodded just enough to let him know that I had heard him.

We arrived at the altar and went our separate ways. When we were in place, Jeremy tried to smile at me but I couldn’t bring myself to return the gesture. Not today. Right before Karee’s bridal march started I mustered up the courage to look at Jeremy and wink. He visibly relaxed and smiled.

Then Karee came into view. And nothing existed to Jeremy but her. I bit the inside of my cheak so I wouldn’t burst into tears. I could feel Mike’s look without even looking at him. I felt too ashamed to look at anyone across for me or anyone at all.

I especially didn’t want to look at Karee after what she said to me at her bachelorette party.

Flashback:

“Charlie, you are so pathetic.” She laughed at me after we had all downed a few drinks. I looked at her, entirely shocked. I thought we had been cool with each other. I never assumed she didn’t like me or anything.

She took me not saying anything as an open invitation to continue. “Jeremy never ever thought of you as anything but a friend. It’s so obvious though. Everyone, and I mean everyone, knows you love him. He must think you’re really hideous and boring if you guys never got together in all that time you have known him. I mean, I’m marrying the guy and I’ve only known him for two years!”

I stood up without another word and ran to My, Mike’s, and until recently, Jeremy’s apartment in tears.

Jeremy was usually the guy I ran to but Mike knew a little bit more than Jeremy. He knew I’d been in love with the guy since as long as I could remember. Mike and I clicked the first day we had met when Jeremy invited me to one of Prada’s practices. He’s been my rock though everything.

“Mike, she’s so cruel!” I sobbed into his chest. “Can I stay in your room tonight? I don’t want to be on my own..” He nodded sleepily and we both were out as soon as our heads hit the pillows.

End Flashback.

She got closer and closer to where Jeremy stood. I locked eyes with Mike. He looked back with a look filled with comfort and protection, making me feel a tiny bit better.
I didn’t watch their kiss or watch them walk away arm in arm. People even started to follow the newlyweds out but I still didn’t move. Mike came over and rested his forehead on mine and tool my hands into his own.

“You made it.” He smiled. I closed my eyes and gave him a “yes” dripping with sarcasm. We stayed like that for a moment before he backed up, “To the reception.” He lead me to his car which we both had arrived in.

The reception went as well as it could’ve for someone in a position like my own. Everyone was happy and drinks were flowing. Mike, being the ever responsible gentleman told me he wouldn’t drink. For that I was thankful. My alcohol consumption was a bit more than usual.
“Miiiike, please dance with me!” I said as I sat down at the empty table he sat at.

“No.”

I sighed and pulled his hands into my lap, “Please, everyone else is already dancing with who they came with. I came with you, I feel like my heart has been ripped from my chest, and I want to dance!” I said rather bluntly. I jumped back up with such momentum that I pulled him up too.

He gave in and we joined everyone else. He stood there awkwardly for a few seconds until he started swaying with the beat. I looped my arms around his neck and laughed. “Aw Mike. You’re such a cute dancer.” I planted a kiss before he could mumble through a response. He blushed nonetheless.

“Charlie, you’re a bit buzzed.”

I nodded, “a tad.”

The song changed to a slow song and Mike brought my body close to his.“I love this song” I mumbled into his ear. I felt his cheeks raise into a smile, “I know you do Charles.” With that, we swayed in silence to ‘Into Your Arms’ by The Maine.

The rest of the night wasn’t so bad until the night was winding down. The DJ decided to be cool and call for a ‘swap dance’. “Dance with someone you didn’t come with tonight! That includes the lovely bride and groom!”

Mike gave my hand a squeeze and murmured in my ear that Jeremy was coming up behind me.

“Excuse me Mike, but may I borrow our dear Charlie for a moment?” Mike nodded and backed up a few steps. Jeremy lead me to the floor. I casually looped my arms around his neck as he did the same to my waist.

“I’m so glad that the two most important girls in my life get along so well. Everything is fitting together so perfectly Charles. I’m so glad you were here today. I couldn’t do it without you with me.” He was speaking in my ear so he didn’t see the tears that were leaking out of my eyes. I was doing such a good job of hiding them until I accidentally let out a small sniffle. Jeremy heard and stepped back to see my face. “Charlie are you…are you crying?”

I shook my head but he gave me his “come on now” look. I sighed, puddy in his hands. “I’m just really happy for you.” I mustered up a small smile.

He grinned at me like a fool and hugged me tight. “I love you Charlie, and I always will. Please don’t forget that.” He released me as the song ended. I excused myself and walked outside where the rain that had been predicted that morning came down in sheets.

I stood in the rain and started laughing. At this point I was done crying or even caring for the day. So what if I ruined that fugly bridesmaid dress? So what if people saw me jumping in puddles, laughing like a loon?

I was so busy enjoying myself with my one woman pity party that I didn’t notice Mike come out. He came over and slid his arms around me in a backwards hug. He knew I would be as far away from the happy couple as possible.

“Mike” I sighed out fondly. I didn’t have anything to say after that. Simply saying his name brought me comfort.

“Charlie,” he said just as fondly and spun me around to face him , “it’ll be just you and me in the house now.” We always referred to the spacious apartment as a house. It mine as well be. Sure it didn’t have a yard or its own driveway but we could never kick the habit.

“You’re right! Karee won’t be hanging around either! I think I’m going to love it being just you and I.”

He smiled, “Yeah, me too.”