So Hard to Face the Truth

"So, what's been up with you and June lately?"

My head snaps towards Nicole, one of my closest best friends. Besides June, of course.

"What?" I ask as if I didn't fully hear her question.

“I said,” She begins with emphasis, “What has gone on with and June?”

Batting my long black lashes, I shrug and play innocent. “Nothing’s up with us. We’re fine.”

"It's not nothing." She says, her green eyes searching my expression. "Ya'll have been, I don't know. Just not normal. It's weird."

"Well, it's nothing. Really."

She narrows her emerald orbs, and taps her fingers against the food court table separating us. "Don't pretend with me. Plus, I'm not the only one who notices."

"Who?" My eyes get a little wider, my heartbeat speeds up nervously. I start to feel trapped all of sudden, like I'm getting pushed into a corner.

"Ashleigh and Clarissa. And some of June's friends too. We can all tell something's different."

What?!

"I don't know what you're talking about. We haven't been acting no different than usual." I say, leaning back coolly and taking a casual sip of my caramel frappuccino.

Nicole sighs, crossing her arms over her small chest. "Kirk, we've been friends since sixth grade. I can tell when you're lying."

"I'm not lying, Nicole." My straw makes a slurping sound as I take my last sip, then get up to throw away my cup. "I swear." I add, sitting back down.

"You're so damn stupid sometimes." Shaking her head, my best friend gets up to throw her trash away. Instead of sitting down across from me, she pulls out the chair right beside me and sits.

“You know you can tell me anything, right? I’m your best friend and I’m not going to go around telling your secrets. Or judge you. I love you to death.”

Her words, so heartfelt, make me tear up a little. I tear my brown eyes away from hers and stare into my lap. Suddenly, I feel so guilty- for keeping something so important, so major in my life away from her and the rest of my best friends.

But the hell if I’m going to tell her about it. I didn’t admit anything to June so I’m sure as hell not going to assai anything to Nicole or any of my other besties. Some things just don’t need to be said.

“Aw, thanks Nicole, I love you too.” I grab her around the shoulders and give her a big hug. When I let go I repeat, “I swear, nothing’s wrong. And if there was I’d talk to you about it.”

We leave the mall, and head back home. She drops me off at my house and immediately after arguing with my brother Cameron I go to my room and fall onto the bed. My head hurts, and I just want to fall into sweet, blissful sleep.