A Step to Love

Neither. Did. I.

What the fuck?! Really. Explain to me, how sleeping with an ass is going to help my pain? Why can’t it be Brit? Nothing is wrong with her! And she said it her self: “you guys will never do anything”.

“Why?” I frowned at her.

“I was twenty when it happened."

"What happened?" I asked her.

"My experience is too much of an embarrassment to say it so publicly.” Pat came toward me and lifted my chin. “I don’t feel comfortable with you here sleeping on that couch. I mean—not that I hope it happens, but, what if someone breaks in the house? You’ll be safer inside a room.” She smiled and then added, “But don’t worry, I’ll tell you about my little experience some day.”

“Oh, you mean that time in a camp and you had to sleep with a girl on the same bed,” Jake blurted and then laughed. “Yeah, she asked you to have sex with her?” Pat glared at Jake for a long time and he turned to look at the floor. “Sorry.”

“That’s not so bad, Pat.” I assured her. “I mean, if you didn’t do anything that is.”

Her eyes got wide. “Of course not!”

I flushed in embarrassment. I should just keep my mouth shut for a moment. Well, there was nothing important after that. I respected Pat’s fears, but I had no problem in admitting they were a bit weird. I was conscious enough not to...I'm not even finishing this sentence.

“I can’t believe this shit,” Alex said once we reached his room and I was trying to close the door with all of my things cluttered in my hands. He sat on his bed and then turned to me. “What the hell have I ever done to her to deserve this? Why can’t you go with Jake? He likes you! I. Don’t.”

I raised an eyebrow at him. “I was actually beginning to feel sorry for you.”

“Don’t you dare.” He got up and started pacing.

I couldn’t believe it. Could somebody hate that much? I wasn’t thrilled about it either, but still…

“Maybe you are just so ‘disappointed’ because you’re not going to be able to sneak up your little girlfriend to have sex with,” I muttered. My thought slipped from my mind and I hoped it didn’t cause for me to go back to the sofa. His pacing stopped and he glared at me. When he gritted his teeth together he exploded…even more than he already had.

“That’s none of your motherfucking business,” he snapped.

I was so out of here.

I waited for him to explode some more, but it appeared that he was waiting for me to say something.

After this, I was going to have to learn to hold my tongue—even if it hurt. After all, I was a visitor and this place was part of his property.

Now that I think of it, this was just like that time I was in California and I almost got bit by a shark on the beach. The room was Alex’s sea, he was the shark and of course, I was the intruder.

I mentally groaned; it sucked playing bait.

I turned away from him, but then I realized a small detail. The reason I was staying here on the first place.

“Where am I going to sleep?”

He shrugged his wide shoulders and turned his back to me. “I’m going to take a bath.” With that, he got inside the bathroom and I was left alone.

I stared at the pile of things in front of the door.

“Well, might as well get started to ‘settle in’”, I muttered and started with my suitcase, hoping there was enough space for all of my clothes in Alex’s closet.

While unpacking, my mind wandered into other things like the party this Saturday. I found rather funny that a dance academy was having a dance party, but after all, it was for a good cause and if a lot of people showed up, that meant a lot of manatees would be safe.

I had accepted Brody as my date, but we didn’t even plan when and where were we meeting. Perhaps calling him later wouldn’t be such a bad idea.

Once my clothes were in their place—had to leave some in the suitcase; the room wasn’t enough—I glanced at the clock. It was 8:36pm. Wow, time flew by so freaking quickly and I didn’t even feel hungry.

I reached for my diary and my favorite blue pencil that were still in the little pile of things.

I didn’t even have to look up to know that Alex had burst through the bathroom’s door. Man, he takes so much time with his beauty bath.

I was still in the middle of my speech with the diary when his voice ran in my ear.

“What are you writing?”

I immediately closed the blue diary and looked at him. His blue eyes were so damn close and staring right into my mouth.

He was on his knees on the bed I sat in.

“Nothing,” I whispered.

Something inside of me felt slightly disappointed when he cleared his throat and backed away from me.

“So…” He tried to change the subject. He propped against his elbow, but was still staring at my lips.

My sigh made his gaze change to my eyes.

“Are you going to tell me now where I am sleeping or are you going to wait until pigs fly?” I asked annoyed.

Once again, he raised an eyebrow and shrugged. “If I would have known this sooner, I would’ve prepared the corner with pillows and blankets just the way you like it.”

I scoffed. “Thanks, that makes me feel oh, so better.”

“No problem.”

Though he said the worst things, even I had to admit that his smile made me think that there was actually some good inside of him, but the again, I could be just saying that.

“Uh, here,” he said handing me a part of his quilt, but before I could “snuggle” with my new roomie, I had to do something about my horrible stench.

“Excuse me,” I said and went to the bathroom to take my normal fifteen-minute bath. The bathroom smelled so good. It smelled like mint and freaking strawberries.

He was already asleep when I slid next to him. I felt weirdly comfortable and safe next to him. His presence made me feel protected; made me feel as if nothing would ever go wrong and that scared me…a lot.

I found sleep with a last glance at the clock that told me it was 1:18am.

The dream was about Alex—no surprise there.

He was being his old ass self when we were hanging out with our friends in some gorgeous beach. He held my hand the entire time and once our friends left, he kept telling me that things were going to get better and that he was here to protect me.

When the sun set, his lips were about to touch mine, but then, the alarm went off.