You're the Only One...Aren't You?

Chapter 3: "Death To Your Heart"
[Part 1]
[Savannah's P.O.V]
(The night Dahvie and her broke up)

Listening to Blood On The Dance Floor had been my life since I was 21 years old, and I met Dahvie for the first time at one of his concerts when I was 21 years old. We started hanging out more, since I had become best friends with a guy named Andrew Ferrara (Garrett had been in the band at the time) and I hooked Andrew up with my friend Teresa, who started going by Sally Stiches. I was 26 now, and I had somehow managed to date Dahvie for about 4 and a half years. I've never cheated; I hate it, I didn't want to, and I thought it was stupid...up until the point where I saw Jayy Von Monroe. That being said, I still thought cheating was wrong, and I didn't even want to...but he was so tempting, especially when he was asleep - he was adorable. I honestly didn't know what made me do it, or why I had the sudden urge...but for the past week I'd tried to get Jayy. I had moved back in with my best friend and blood brother, Garrett McLaughlin (a.k.a Garrett Ecstasy), and I knew he'd comfort me, even though I had been in the wrong. I knew he had issues with Dahvie but he would still tell me I had been the one who caused our breakup, who caused everything to go wrong.

Even though Dahvie and I had our fight, I was listening to "Believe" as I walked home in the rain. "I wonder what he's doing," I thought to myself, sighing, not wanting to think about Dahvie but not being able to help it. He got me to stop being such a bitch...to stop thinking I was better than everyone else. I felt so ashamed when I realized how much of a bitch I had been to Jayy when I first met him...I flashed back to the day I met Jayy, a silent tear rolling down my face.

[The Flash Back]

"Oh my God, I fucking love this place," I squealed as I ran up to the front door of a huge white 2 story house, giggling as my blonde hair bounced behind me. I could hear Dahvie laugh a bit behind me - another tear slid down my cheek as I pictured him smiling and laughing - as I opened the front door, twirling into the first room. "This place is AMAZING," I practically yelled, giggling again as I skipped into the living room, coming to a sudden stop. I saw a skinny guy with a few piercings and a single tattoo on his chest sleeping on the couch in just his boxers. "Eww, who's he," I scrunched my nose up a bit, staring at him as Dahvie walked up behind me, tossing the car keys onto the wooden table to his left. "That's my new band member," he said, still smiling as he shrugged slightly, "He's actually pretty cool once you get to know him, Savannah." I tilted my head to the right a bit, muttering to Dahvie, "He's soooo skinny...he's gross...he's kind of anorexic or something. I don't know, I don't like him..." Dahvie hugged me around my waist from behind, whispering into my right ear softly, "Baby, it's all right, he's okay...he doesn't eat a lot, but he's still fun to hang out with, so try and be nice, okay?" I only nodded and Dahvie kissed me on the lips, squeezing me tightly and sighing as he picked the keys back up. "I have to go for a few hours - it's a friend's birthday today, so if and when he wakes up, try to be nice to him." I rolled my eyes a bit, smiling as I watched him leave.

A few hours passed, and the guy on the couch finally woke up...he stared at me until I took my eyes off of the TV to stare back at him. "What," I asked, an attitude in my tone since I hated being stared at, especially by strangers. "Nothing," he replied, and finally rolled off the couch and stood up. He stretched up his arms, facing away from me, and then folded them behind his head, just watching TV like that for a few minutes. He put his arms down, turning and walking towards me...he put out his right hand, smiling a little at me. "I'm Jayy," he said softly, and I just stared up at him. "Savannah...and I don't shake hands..." At that, he frowned a little and shrugged his shoulders, letting his hand fall back to his side. "Sorry...I just thought I'd try and be polite," he answered quietly, and I glared at him. "Save it for someone who gives a fucking crap," I had my voice lowered, and as I said it, I sounded irritated and annoyed. "Yeah, you're right; I guess trying to be polite to Dahvie's girlfriends never work out. They're always stuck up bitches who have their heads up their asses, too good for anyone else, and the only reason they think that is because they're dating him. As soon as he comes around, though, they're all sweet and innocent again - I've gotten this a lot," he told me and smirked a bit, walking down the hallway and into a room at the end of the hall. My jaw dropped a bit and I just stared down the hallway, too much in shock to do anything.

[The Snap Back from Flash Backs]

I knew I deserved it...I also knew Dahvie would break up with me eventually. I deserved anything that happened to me. I didn't deserve Dahvie, and he finally realized it. I remember apologizing to Jayy when I saw him again after that...and that's when I started to fall for him. He had shrugged it off already when I'd seen him, and he just smiled and asked to start over again. We were friends, and I was okay with that - but then came the lust...the lust that was created whenever I heard him sing, the lust that was created whenever he walked past my room in only his boxers...I couldn't stop myself. Finally I realized I reached the front door of my house, and I opened it, quickly going inside and shutting the door behind me. Garrett looked up at me; he was laying on the couch playing COD: MW3 (Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3) on the Xbox 360 we had, and he was grinning when I walked in.

"Hey sis," he said, then yelling, "Fuck!!" as he died on the game. I waved a bit and walked straight back to my room, going into the room and slamming the door shut. I locked it and took off my hoodie, throwing it onto my bed, then throwing myself onto my bed. As I lay there, looking up at my ceiling, I found myself thinking I had never felt so alone before in my entire life. I closed my eyes and turned up my music, now playing "You Dun Goofed"...I realized I had even stayed with Dahvie through the whole Jessie Slaughter incident, telling people he wouldn't have done that because he's so much sweeter than they knew...and I was lucky to have him. "Why...why did I even do that," I thought, tearing streaming down my cheeks more as I felt my makeup start to run, "I lost the most amazing thing I'd ever had..." Another flashback hit me like a 2 ton pound of bricks...

[Flash Back # 2]

"Savannah," I heard Dahvie say one night when we were out at dinner, "can I ask you something...?" I looked at him and arched my eyebrow slightly, then nodded, taking a sip of my wine. "We've been dating for 3 years this coming December," he started, and once again I nodded and let him continue, "You may not be ready...but I know I am, baby." At this point I was so confused at what he was talking about, but I got butterflies quickly and then it intensified. I focussed on eating, until I looked over at him again and he was down on his knee, holding up a small black velvet box with an engagement ring in it. It was round with a gold band on it - the style of it was solitaire, and the diamond cut was SI (signature ideal). "Savannah...will you marry me," Dahvie asked softly, a light sparkle in his eyes. I couldn't stop staring at it - it was beautiful. My jaw had dropped slightly, and I wasn't breathing. "You may not be ready...but I know I am, baby," echoed through my mind as I looked up at him, tears stinging the corners of my eyes.

I shook my head no...I couldn't marry him...not now. "I...I can't, Dahvie, I just really...really can't right now," I said, covering my mouth a bit as the tears escaped and ran down my face, "I love you, but I can't yet - it seems so soon, and I know we've been dating a while...but I want to keep it like this a little longer, please..." He nodded slowly and closed the box, standing up. He pulled his chair closer to me, sat down, and reached his hand up to my face, wiping the tears from my cheeks. "It's all right," he said, a smile placing itself gently on his lips, "I love you too, and I don't want to see you cry, beautiful. Please don't cry. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but only when you're ready to do so..."

I snapped out of the flash back, not wanting to remember how sweet he'd been to me, not wanting to remember what I'd lost and why I lost it. I lost him just like I'd lost Aaron Nichols, my first best friend and lover - but Aaron left me because I didn't want to marry him...Dahvie stood by my side the whole time. I lost myself in my thoughts for hours, contemplating if I could ever get Dahvie back, and how if yes. I started to fall asleep as "Miss Bipolar" came on, but still thinking of ways to get him back. I could only think of one answer, one solution; but it meant someone was getting hurt one way or another...