I'm Nothing Without You

I stared at Brendon’s shocked expression and knew that mine wasn’t far off. So I did hear Matt right, Brendon was Kara and Matt’s brother!

“What are you doing here?” He asked, glancing at the house behind me curiously. I couldn’t blame him, seeing me next door to his house was probably really odd when he still thought I was back in North Carolina. Maybe I should have mentioned it to him before I left, it would have lessened the awkwardness we both felt in this moment.

“I was just about to ask you the same thing.” I said crossing my arms over my chest. Seeing Brendon wasn’t awkward, it was just painful. After what happened with Ryan, I couldn’t bring myself to look Brendon in the eye. I knew his feelings for me, and I made him believe that I didn’t have any for him…but I do.

Brendon looked back at his house and sighed. “My dad’s birthday is tomorrow, do you know Rae and Kale?”

I nodded, realizing that Brendon had known Uncle Kale and Aunt Rae since he was little. “They are my aunt and uncle. I wanted to visit while Spencer was away.”

He smiled and stepped up onto the porch. His hair was flat against his head and it looked as if he had just woken up. He had on a white Hollister hoodie and faded pastel blue Dickie’s shorts. Even with a tired expression, Brendon looked good.

He sat down next to me on the swing and we just rocked back and forth for a few moments, enjoying each other’s company. As the saying goes, all good things must come to an end.

“So,” He stared, crossing his muscular arms across his chest. “What exactly happened the day you asked me to come over?”

I groaned inwardly, wishing he hadn’t asked, and glanced over at him. My first thought was that Ryan told him about what happened between us, but I knew that he probably was just as proud of it as I was. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, why did you start acting all weird around me after I tried to kiss you?”

Relieved, I turned my body to face him and stifled a small smile. “You were going to kiss me?”

He smiled his crooked smile and nodded. “Of course I was.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what got into me…” My voice trailed off as Brendon looked deep into my eyes. Now I knew why I thought Kara and Matt looked so familiar. Their eyes are identical to Brendon’s. He pushed his bangs away from his face with the tips of his fingers and licked his lips casually. I knew that the action wasn’t intentional, but watching him made me want to grab him right here and kiss him.

“It’s okay, I just wanna know that the next time I try to kiss you…you won’t blow me off again.” There was a hint of playfulness in his voice and I couldn’t help but blush.

I averted my eyes from him and stared down at the wooden floor. “The next time?”

I could feeling him laughing beside me and I glanced up at him. He smiled at me and placed his hand on my knee. “Pretty girl.”

I could feel the heat from his hand under my jeans and I desperately wanted him to keep it there. Brendon was one of the only people that knew how to get to me. He knew what made me tick without me even telling him. He watched me, closely, and I liked that about him. He cared about me, and I knew I couldn’t ruin things between us this time. Brendon’s face started to inch closer and closer to mine and I could feel my heart start to beat faster and faster. My breath quickened and I watched as those beautiful eyes glanced down at my waiting lips.

Brendon’s lips hovered over mine for a few seconds, his breath on my face, and then he whispered with a smirk, “Looks like you’ll have to wait.”

He stood up from the swing and shoved his hands in his jacket pockets. He winked at me before walking down the stairs and onto his lawn. He turned around to glance at me and when he caught my eye, he smiled his gorgeous smile and pushed open the sliding glass door leading into his kitchen. He waved and disappeared into the house.

I just sat there, dumbfounded. I couldn’t lie to myself anymore, I was falling for Brendon Urie, hard. I stood up from the swing and a shiver ran up my spine. It took all I had in me not to run over to his house and force him to come back to me. I walked around the porch and into the front door.

The house was silent but I could hear the faint murmur from the TV in Aunt Rae and Uncle Kale’s bedroom above the foyer.

I kicked off my shoes and ran up the stairs into my room. I slipped off my jeans and t-shirt and pulled on an oversized hoodie that I stole from Spencer when he was trying to lose weight a few years ago. I smiled at the hazy memory and crawled into the huge bed. I smirked, knowing that I probably looked so small in comparison. I pulled the covers up to my chin and glanced out the window at Brendon’s house.

On the second floor, a light flickered on and I could see Brendon strip off his sweatshirt and disappear beyond the window. I turned on my side and closed my eyes, trying desperately to keep the image of Brendon in my mind while I drifted off to sleep.

~-~-~-

“Cam, are you ready?” Aunt Rae yelled from the bottom of the stairs. I stared at my reflection in the mirror and sighed deeply. I was so average looking, I didn’t see what Brendon saw in me. His words echoed in my head and I smiled at the thought of him saying, “Pretty girl.” In that moment, I believed him.

Looking at myself now, I wasn’t so sure. My long dark hair was curling slightly due to the humidity.

The little wisps of hair by my temples were sticking straight out and sadly, no amount of hairspray would slick them down. There was a new blemish appearing on my right cheek that not enough make up in the world could cover up and the freckles on the bridge of my nose had darkened due to the sun and scattered onto my cheeks.

I averted my eyes from the mirror and walked back into my room. The sun shone through the window and onto my bed and I wished that I could just crawl back into it and stay there all day.

There was a small knock on my door and Aunt Rae smiled at me softly. “I called for you, didn’t you hear?”

I shook my head and pulled on a sweater over my navy blue tank top. “No, I was kind of preoccupied.”

She stepped into my room and placed her hand on my arm. “You look beautiful today.”

I smiled at her, knowing that she was being sincere and I slipped on my Old Navy flip flops. Before stepping out of my room, she turned to me and said, “We’re leaving in five minutes.”

I nodded and watched her disappear down the stairs. I glanced out the window at Brendon’s house and saw him resting his forearms on the porch. His eyes were distant as he stared out into the city. I smiled softly and ran down the stairs.

Uncle Kale nodded at me as I flung open the front door. I ran down the steps and onto the soft, damp grass. It wasn’t till I stepped up onto the wooden deck that Brendon realized my presence.

“Hey, pretty girl.”

He wrapped his arms around me and I got a whiff of his musky aftershave. He kissed my forehead and held me out at arm’s length. He smiled and me and interlocked his fingers with mine.

“How’s the party?” I asked glancing into the window at the middle aged crowed.

He smirked, “They are in there, and I’m out here...you can figure out the rest.”

I leaned my body back against his and for a moment, I felt safe. I peered out into the distance at the quiet city and it baffled me how it can go from a bustling party town at night to a normal city by day.

“What are you thinking about?” He mumbled into my hair. I felt his breath against my ear and a shiver ran up my spine. He must have felt my shiver because he wrapped his arm around my middle and pulled me closer.

“I’m just glad to be here with you.” I said glancing behind me at his gorgeous face.

His deep brown eyes peered down into mine and a small crooked smile played on his lips. “I’m glad to be here with you too, Cam.”

He leaned down close to my face and I prayed that he wouldn’t pull away this time.

He didn’t.

He closed the space between us and his lips brushed against mine. My heart leapt into my throat and I turned around so our bodies were pressed against each other’s. He pushed me back against the banister and placed his hand on the small of my back. Our lips moved in sync and I felt his tongue run across my bottom lip, pleading for entrance. I parted my lips and his tongue brushed against mine. I gripped the nape of his neck and tangled my fingers in his soft brown hair.

There was a small cough from behind Brendon and we pulled away quickly to see Uncle Kale and Aunt Rae awkwardly smiling on the steps.

“Don’t stop on our account.” Aunt Rae smirked and leaned into Uncle Kale. He chuckled and threw in his two cents, “Yeah, don’t stop, I was waiting to see who would come up for a breath first.”

I rolled my eyes and Brendon wrapped his arm around my waist. He stuck his hand out to Uncle Kale and said, “Long time no see, Anderson.”

Uncle Kale smiled and shook his hand firmly. “Same to you, Urie. I didn’t know you guys knew each other so….well.”

Brendon’s arm tightened and smiled down at me. “We’re old friends.”

Aunt Rae smirked and tugged on Uncle Kales arm. “Let’s leave these two alone, Kale.”

After they disappeared into the house, Brendon turned to me and said, “Let’s go somewhere more private.”

There was a look in his eyes that I hadn’t seen before, it was a look of hunger...for me.

I took him by the hand and we ran across the yard to Aunt Rae and Uncle Kale’s. Once the door was closed safely behind us, he grabbed me and his lips crashed against mine.

His hands roamed across my body and his eyes scanned me length wise. “You are so beautiful.” He growled.

He picked me up in his arms and carried me up the stairs, his lips never breaking from mine.

He stepped over the threshold and into my room. He laid me on my bed and crawled on top of me. I stared up into his eyes and he kissed from the hollow part of my neck up to my lips.

“You can say no…” He whispered, barely audible. That sounded so familiar, but in that moment…it didn’t matter.

“Yes.” Was all I could get out before his lips were on mine again and his hands were sliding under my shirt.

Before I knew it, our clothes were scattered on the floor and I was making love to the love of my life, Brendon Urie.