Complete

Have you ever felt as though you were currently in the presence of something amazing, more spectacular than anything you have ever seen or witnessed before, something that made you feel good, something you had no knowledge of but wanted to know more about, but all in all- something amazing.

Well, that's how I felt right at this moment, except I wasn't referring to a something. More like someone, and she was the most beautiful soul I had ever laid eyes on.

I could see her across the room, spreading around her joy with the bright smile that never once left her face, not even for a second. She was becoming so contagious that for a moment, I found myself crack a slight smile. It felt weird, glancing back at her every once in a while, each time making me feel more curious to turn around again. She was gorgeous, with her long, dark brown hair that rested on her shoulders with ease; her adorably toothy grin; the way she'd sip her drink like a true lady, but she'd joke around with the vocabulary of a sailor; and the fact that she was beaming with the mark of freedom and it shown brighter than the sun.

She was everything that a guy could ever want and the fact that this was the only time I'd ever see her again hurt, because I really did feel like there was something different about her. I wanted to do it, go up and talk to her, but I was to shy too even step another foot closer to her, so I let my true colors show, as well as the coward I knew I was.

The bartender appeared in front of me, asking if I'd like another drink, and all I do is nod. He grabs my glass and vanishes to the other side of the wrap around bar. He comes back a minute later, holding a tall glass of beer, ready for me to gulp down. If this was any other night, I'm sure I'd already been talking to the pretty little thing over there, but tonight was different. I guess you really don't know pain until you go through one or more of three things: death, breakups, or losing the ones you love. I unfortunately went through two of these recently... too recently.

I remember it all so clearly, the way my girlfriend walked up to me nervously, twiddling her thumbs as if she had something hard to say, which she did, and she left me with me a broken and aching heart.

"Stop." I hear Olivia say from behind. I paused, letting the cuff I was buttoning fall limp around my wrist. Tonight we were going out to dinner, something I had been planning for quite a long time. I was going to propose to her, the woman I've been completely head over heels for since high school. She was everything I'd never dreamed of being lucky enough to have, which was a love with a girl like Olivia.

After turning myself around to face her, I notice that she was dressed down in casual clothes far from something she would ever wear for a nice date out. She steps closer to me, but doesn't do anything more than pick at her nails. All she does is just stand at the door of our bedroom in our tiny apartment, looking nervous and a bit shaky. "Babe, what's wrong?" I ask, walking up to her so that I could wipe the tears that were now forming at the rims of her eyes. I cupped her face in my hands and rubbed away the signs of sadness falling from her eyes.

"Kenny..." She whispers, grabbing my hands and pulling them away from her face. "I can't."

"Can't what?" What did she mean by that? It was obvious that something was up and that this perfect dinner I've been thinking about for months just might not happen anymore. Did she mean she couldn't...

She just responds with a shake of her head, sending tears dripping down her face messily, and she seems to just let it out. Every time I would try to touch her, she would just push me away and cover her face. I had no idea what was going on right now and the only thing I could clarify was that my girlfriend was distressing about something, which I didn't like, and I couldn't even do anything to help. "What's going on, Liv?"

"This, whatever this is anymore, it isn't working." She cries, moving her hand in between both of us. We weren't working out anymore? To me, things were more than perfect, and I hadn't even seen Olivia show any signs of unhappiness. Actually, she seemed better than ever, to be honest.

"Where is this coming from? You've never even told me that things weren't working out between us. We went out for breakfast yesterday morning and you told me you were the happiest you've ever been. Were you just lying to me or did you mean it? Did something happen?" I ask, keeping my distance from her and feeling completely fine with it.

"No, I meant it, just... not about us." She didn't even have to tell me any more than that. I knew instantly that there was another man. The fact that she didn't even have the decency to break up with me early on when these feelings started for this other guy disgusted me. She's been leading me on for who knows how long and the only thought I could think was, She's not the same girl I met in high school.

I close my eyes for a moment and take a deep breath before opening them to see her still standing there, avoiding my gaze and awkwardly playing with her hands. "What's his name?"

"What?" She stutters, as if she'd thought I wouldn't have even guessed.

"What's his name?" I say back, a little harsher this time. This time, she looks me straight in the eyes and I hope she can see how hurt I am. I'm actually disappointed in her, because I honestly thought she was better than this. Lying and cheating. Had I not given her what she needed? Had I not provided enough love for her? Was it that we had lost our spark, even though for me, it was burning brighter every single day.

"I wanted to tell you sooner, but I couldn't! I just didn't know how to tell you..."

I wanted to know every single reason why she wasn't in love with me anymore, but at the same time, I didn't care at all. "How long?"

"4 months..." I bring my hands to my temples and start to rub them out of frustration. Four months? This isn't just some fling that just started. No, she's been hiding this from me for four goddamn months. I couldn't even begin to explain how infuriating this was to hear. She notices my anger and tries to talk again. "Kenny, I-"

"Don't call me that, please." I spit, immediately digging around in the pockets of my slacks and pull out a black velvet box, round around the edges and holding the most perfect of treasures. I crack open the top and watch her eyes as she processes what it was. I hold it out for her to see and say, "At least you had the decency to tell me before I humiliated myself." I didn't even care that I was being so mean, because I was hurt, no, broken hearted, and I felt cheated. I felt like this was all a game, even if the first four and a half years were real, I felt like she had been pulling at my heart strings this whole time. Either way, I was mad, mad at her for doing this to me when she knew that this love was the best to ever happen to me.

I hear her call my name in between cries as I just start ripping my clothes from the hangers and stuffing them into a large bag I'd found lying on the floor in my closet. Once most of my clothes were packed, I just stomped angrily towards the door. I feel her grab for my arm before I can fully exit the house, but all I do is shake her hand off and leave.

I felt like an asshole for days after that, regretting every single hurtful word and thing I did to her that day. Regardless of the fact that she broke my heart, I still loved her and because of that, I felt guilty, so I guess here I am at this bar tonight, trying to potentially drink away the guilt, even though I knew it would never be easy.

I felt my phone vibrate in my back pocket, but I just ignored it, because I really wasn't in any mood to start a conversation with anyone. After a few more buzzes, it finally stops. I check my wristwatch and notice that it's already half past eleven. I wanted to leave and go home, but where would I even go? I've been hopping from one friend's house to another and I sure as hell couldn't kick Olivia out of mine. I just couldn't do that to her, because I wasn't that guy. I know that she needed it much more than I did, but a small part of me wanted to do it just because I wouldn't be the guy living there anymore.

Not even 5 minutes later did my phone start to vibrate again. This time, I pulled it out from the back pocket of my jeans and unlocked it to see a message from my buddy Pat.

How are you holding up?

I sighed heavily, hating to be reminded but loving the fact that my friends cared enough to ask. I stood there, thinking of something to say back, but before I could reply, the bartender came over and pushed a small glass of vodka in front of me. "Sorry, I didn't order another dri-"

"It's from those girls over there." He says, cutting me off by pointing over in the direction of a very familiar face.

There she was, the girl that I couldn't keep my eyes off earlier. She and her friends waved over at me, all of them giggling before looking away, except for her. She was just sitting there, smiling her amazingly white toothed grin. I hadn't even pulled my eyes away and she was already at my side in an instant. "Thanks for the drink."

"Don't take this the wrong way, but you look like you needed one." I glance over at her and see her smile faintly, knowing that she means nothing but sympathy when saying that. Now that she was close, closer than I'd expected, you could really make out her every detail. Her eyes were a light shade of brown, contrasting quite beautifully with her dark hair color. I could see faint lines at the sides of her mouth, a dead giveaway that this girl smiled more than she frowned. I couldn't stop myself from looking around her face, taking in her light complexion and clear face.

It seems as in this moment, for even the slightest of time, I had forgotten if the name Olivia had ever meant a thing to me. Unfortunately, it didn't last long, but I did notice that it wasn't as significant as it was before. This girl was obviously the cause and I didn't mind at all. “I kind of did.” I chuckled, shaking my head at the bar top before taking a sip of my original drink. I looked over at her and smiled slightly, hoping she would notice what I meant by that and she did.

“You did, huh? What changed that?” She jokes, cocking her head to the side adorably, unintentionally scrunching her nose up. All I did was shrug my arms in a humorous kind of fashion and look back down at my glass. My eyes travel from the tabletop to her hands, one finger occupied by a very odd ring, but it fit her. Thankfully, it wasn't the ring I'd been expecting it to be. A beautiful girl like her isn't in a relationship yet? Well, I'll be damned.

After another minute of comfortable silence, I leaned over and stuck my hand out for her to shake. She was in the middle of sipping her drink, so she just giggled, set her drink down, and shook my hand with another award winning smile. “Kennedy.”

“Grace.” She smiles back, never once looking away and I didn't at all feel awkward. I know it sounds weird, but the first thing I thought of when she told me her name was one of our songs, Saving Grace. The song spoke of searching for our saving grace and to me, talked about finding someone to spend a lifetime loving and being with. I never really knew John's original thoughts of this song, but to me, that's what it meant.

Just then, I felt as though this moment was unfortunately coming to an end, because out of the corner of my eye, I could see her friends approaching as a tiny group of three. They came up beside her and one rested their shoulders on the counter before speaking. “Hey, you ready?” The girl asks, watching her as she looks to me slowly before directing her attention back to Grace.

I look over to Grace, watching for any signs of her answer to come. She's unreadable and I couldn't even guess what she was thinking. And then out of nowhere, she smiles over at her friends and says, “I'll call you guys later, okay?” One of her friends huffs, crossing her arms impatiently, while the others just give her provocative looks. One even growled fiercely, smirking as she looked around from Grace to the rest of her friends. All she did was shake her head with a laugh before shooing them off, leaving her alone with me, even though we were surrounded by many club goers. “Dance with me.” She says, more commanding me in a casual manor than asking me. I didn't mind, so I just followed her to the middle of the floor and did exactly that.

Little did I know that quite some time later would this girl be my wife, my love for all eternity, and my saving grace.