Under a Paper Moon

“How you enjoying your first day here?” I giggled as I plonked myself down on the grass beside where Fraser and the guys were sitting. Obviously I’d been the last one out of class before lunch because Mr Haner was a right cunt and kept me behind in music to talk about how awful I am at it and how I’m failing and blah blah blah. Fucking American cunt, ugh.

I loved him really, if I’m honest he was my favourite teacher. He was funny and sarcastic and had amazing guitar skills (not to mention he was fucking gorgeous). I know I shouldn’t say that what with Fraser and all but fuck it, I will find other men attractive if I damn well please!

“I’m liking it!” Fraser mimicked my giggle as he bit into an apple. Damn he was so cute. But was that really all he had for lunch? I looked down at my giant bag of Doritos, my can of diet coke and my Toffee Crisp – that makes me feel quite obese, oops.

“That’s good!” I smiled and lay back on the grass; seems like Fraser’s the only person I talk to now – Ben, John and Si were all too preoccupied with their own conversation to really care about what Fraser and I were doing. Sigh. I bet I could fuck him right now and they wouldn’t even notice… pushing that thought aside though, I wonder if I have any classes with him?
I sat up again and leant across Fraser, winking at him as I grabbed his schoolbag. His timetable should be in here, right? He looked at me questionably as I rummaged through the bag, pushing his new books and things out of the way until I found a single piece of crumpled paper. Aha! There it is.

“Wonder if we have any classes together…” I mumbled as I flattened out the page, reading its contents – nope…nope…nope….Yes! Biology! Oh that should be a right laugh. “Looks like we have Biology together,” I grinned at him. I fucking loved Biology, it was my favourite class (even if Mr Haner was my favourite teacher and he was my music teacher…)

“Is that a good thing?” he rose an eyebrow.

“Yup!” My grin grew wider. We have Biology next period actually! Oh I cannot wait. The teacher was a right bitch, I swear she’s fucked up in the head or something – but my table, oh god. We were in the back corner, see the tables hold four people but there aren’t enough people in the class to fill all the seats so at our table it’s me, Ian Watkins and Oliver Sykes. They were both a right laugh, if I’m honest. “Biology is so fun, you have no idea. Teacher’s a mental case though.”

“Uh…okay?” I swear if his eyebrow rose any more it’d fall off his head…

“See that kid over there?” I pointed over to where there was a large group of kids sitting – there were at least ten of them, all in the year below apart from one. I don’t know why he hands out with a bunch of younger kids, probably because his boyfriend’s one of them…. But that one was the kid I was pointing at. “The one with writing all over his arms?”
Fraser nodded.

“That’s Oliver Sykes, although he prefers Oli because he’s a faggot like that,” I laughed – probably shouldn’t call people faggots, but hey what are you gonna do? “He’s such a sarcastic little shit, absolutely hilarious! Sits at my table.”

I then pointed over to where, ew, Stuart and Jocko were standing with their friends. “And see that one?” I pointed to the one standing in the middle of them, back against a wall, sunglasses on looking again like another faggot. Ha. His hair was messy, but sexy at the same time, and he had a permanent smirk on his face. Fraser nodded again. “That’s Ian Watkins, he hangs around with right dickheads but he’s pretty cool. Even funnier than Oli!”

Fraser nodded again, for a third time. Was he even listening to me? Probably not, no one ever listens to me. Sigh. His eyes drifted back over to Oli and his friends – they were all messing about, laughing their asses off; damn I hate popular kids, they thought they were all that. Some of them, like Oli, were pretty dead on, but others. Ugh I can’t even…

“What about the rest of them?” Fraser asked, “what’s their deal?”

I supposed I should tell him the whole story of the school’s ‘food chain’ as Ben called it. I felt like that scene in Mean Girls, when she’s explaining how the tables in the canteen worked – basically our school worked exactly the same. “Okay, well the kid with the really fluffy hair that Oli has his arms wrapped around? That’s his boyfriend Josh. No one fucks with them,” I lowered my voice to a whisper so my friends didn’t hear me, “I get the shit kicked clean out of me for being gay. Them? Oh no. You even say one word against them and Oli’ll have Jona, Matt and Sam on you and I swear you would not wish that fate on anyone. Those two are cute,”

“And the others?” Fraser nodded towards the two hyperactive kids jumping around them.

“Jack and Alex,” I said, “they spend more time looking in the mirror than anything else – except when they’re fucking eating each other’s faces off…”

“Lovely,”

“I know,” I laughed, “the guy with the bleach blonde hair? Dan Flint, gay as fuck and he clearly has the hots for Josh. Bless him though Josh is too preoccupied with Oli to notice. The other five are quieter. Matt and Max, about as hyper as Alex and Jack – but at least they can fucking control themselves! Ugh. Same with the bald guy and his muscly friend, Rian and Zack. They do my fucking head in”

I really liked the word ‘fucking’ toady. Hmm…

I then proceeded to tell him about the rest of the people he needed to know about; Chris Miller – the kid with long hair that spent all his time texting his girlfriend (I swear he’s the only straight one in this entire school). Then I moved onto Jocko and his friends, Ian, Lee, Mike, Stuart and Jamie – they were a different kind of popular, the kids that only got to their place in the ‘food chain’ because they beat their way into it? Yup. Right pricks the lot of them; although I say that, I like Ian, never talked to anyone apart from him, Stuart and Jocko. But they’re friends with Stuart and Jocko. Then there was the loner blonde kid Sean who Ian kept eyeing up all the time…

Then there was the relationships conversation.

“Right,” Fraser bit his lip, trying to understand it, “so Oli and Josh are going out, Jack and Alex are going out, Dan likes Josh, Matt you have no idea about, you’re pretty sure Max is gay, Chris has a girlfriend, Rian has a girlfriend, Zack likes Jack, Ian likes Sean, Jocko and Stuart are homophobic, Jamie and Lee are clearly hooking up behind their backs… am I missing anything?”

“Yeah,” I smirked, looking round me to make sure no one was looking before I leant down and pressed my lips to Fraser’s, “you missed us,”

He smiled up at me, just as the bell went. Great, now for a whole hour of pure hilarity.

“One more thing though,” he said just as I was about to stand up. I looked down at him, silently telling him to continue. He laughed, “why are there so many gay people at this school?”

I don’t know Fraser. I really don’t know…