Inexperienced

A light shown through my eyelids. I fluttered my eyes open. Everything was slightly blurred. But I could tell I wasn’t in my room. I flew up fast and instantly regretted it. My head was spinning and it brought with it pain.

“Oh,” I groaned. I pressed my hand to my temple.

“Here,” came a voice. I snapped my head to the side, another mistake, and saw Jared walking over to me. In his hand, he had a glass of water and several aspirin. He placed them in my hand. “These should help.”

I just stared down at the pills. What was Jared doing here? What am I doing around Jared? I blinked a few times. I recognized his room. It was the one at his Mom’s.

“What am I doing here?” I asked.

“You don’t remember last night?”

I thought for a moment. Memories flooded back and the first thought was Cayde’s emerald green eyes. But then it drifted into another thought of Cayde in a room with me, alone. We were about to….

My eyes widened. “Oh, God.” I hung my head, my face red from embarrassment. “I can’t believe I was about to do that.”

“You didn’t want to,” he pointed out.

I glared up at him. “How would you know?”

“I heard you scream.”

“But how would you know I was screaming? I mean we were all the way in the back.” I eyed him suspiciously.

He just looked at me, no sign of an answer on his lips.

“Any answer?” I demanded.

“Can’t you just be happy I got him off of you?” He groaned.

“Yeah, I am. But he stopped when I yelled.” I explained.

“Well, how was I supposed to know?”

“That’s my point. You shouldn’t have even known where I was. How’d you know I was at that party?”

He glared at me and groaned. “I was there. And when I saw you show up, I sort of hid.”

My jaw dropped. The pathetic excuse for a man was hiding from me? It stung.

“I couldn’t stand to see you dressed like that.”

“Why should you care?”

“You’re not like that, Austin. You showed up with clothes I just know you were uncomfortable in.”

“So what if I was?”

He just shook his head. “And you don’t drink. And you don’t go to parties. I knew something was up.”

“Did you ever think that maybe I wanted a fun Friday night?”

“That is not your definition of fun.” It bugged me how he seemed to know everything about me. “And when you were all over that scumbag-”

“-his name was Cayde,” I interrupted.

“When you were all over Cayde,” he corrected, a sneer in his voice. “I knew something was wrong.”

“So you followed me to the back and waited until you got some sort of cue to come kick his ass?”

“I did it to help you.” He looked innocent.

I scoffed. “I don’t need you or your help.”

He stood up and made a growling noise. “God, Austin.”

I felt the heat rise to my cheeks. I wanted to go over there and slap him. “What, Jared!? What!? What the hell do you want from me?” I was screaming. Tears were starting to pour over my eyes. “You broke my heart, god dammit! I gave you everything I had and you threw it away. And now you expect me to sit at home without a life? That’s bullshit! You’re crazy.”

He turned sharply and got directly in my face. He was gritting his teeth. He growled.

I didn’t even flinch. No, I just sat there staring at him directly in his eyes.

He huffed. “I’m done.”

“You said that before, remember? When you told me we were done?”

His anger flared. He raised his hand; it was flattened. It looked like he was about to smack me.

My eyes grew wide. I closed them quickly waiting for the force of his strong hand to come smacking across my face.

But it never came.

Instead he was standing there, his eyes softening. His arm was shaking. He turned away.

“Jared, I’m sorry.”

“For what?” he mumbled.

“I know you were just looking out for me. And I didn’t appreciate it.”

He walked over to me. It seemed he was about to touch my face but pulled his hand back. “I’m sorry.”

“For?”

“Everything. I hurt you, Austin. Badly. I know I did.” He looked guilty.

I placed my arm on his shoulder. It sent an electric shock through my body. “It’s okay. I just want to move on.” Lies.

“And I stopped you from that.”

“No, you were just looking out for me. That’s something friends do for each other.” I winced at the word ‘friends’.

He looked at me. “Friends?”

“Well, yeah.” I shrugged. “I mean, that’s what friends do. Look out for each other.”

He seemed to contemplate for a moment. “Yeah, friends.”

An awkward minute passed between us. “Look, I’ll take these pills and get home. Thanks again.” I gave him a small smile and swallowed the pills before walking away.

I couldn’t let him see me break down. The term ‘friends’ hurt, but it did feel better than absolutely hating each other. I knew it wouldn’t last long, however. He was going off to college. And I’d be starting my Senior Year.

I guess it was an end to our relationship, but the start of our friendship.