Reckless

Louisa.

"Good afternoon, and welcome to London!"

My eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the light now jutting through the window.

"We hope you had a great flight. You can pick up your bags at the A terminal, and if you have a connecting flight, we've made it directly on schedule. Have a good day."

I never was huge on plane rides, but this one was smooth. I had slept for most of it, to be honest. As we landed I brushed myself off and took a long look out the window. This world didn't seem so different from the one I knew back home.

There was an undeniable knot in my chest. I told myself again and again, this wouldn't happen, but it did. I couldn't help but think of him.

You're not doing this for him. I told myself sharply. This is for you.

I took those words and used them to block out every thought. It'd been almost a year now since I'd seen him, and the memories were fading. I least, I thought they were.

So much had changed, and now, more would. I was finally doing something huge with my life. Well, the entire year had been big, but this was bigger. I had a feeling in my gut that something huge was on the horizon, and being here was just bringing me a step closer to it.

As I stepped off the plane I checked my phone for messages. One from Darlene, my assistant, and one from my client here.

I quickly clicked the voice mail from the client.

"Hello, Ms. St. Vincent, it's Rob. Just making sure your flight went okay and reminding you that we sent for a cab to pick you up at the bottom of the terminal. I've texted you our company address. Can't wait to talk in person and review your designs. See you soon."

I smiled as it clicked off.

I was nervously excited. This was good.

Josh.

"Wake up sleepy head."

"Urgh." I mumbled, a smile gracing me lips as I felt hands touch my chest. Before I'd even opened my eyes a kiss was placed gently on my lips. I was growing used to mornings like this. "Good morning."

My eyes opened to see her beautiful brown eyes; that red-lipped smile that seduced me with every look. Just looking at her woke me up.

"Try afternoon." She laughed, pointing to the clock.

I turned quickly. FUCKING CHRIST, it was nearly noon.

"Fuck," I muttered, jumping out of bed and grabbing for the jeans laying on the ground, "I have a meeting in a bit for the new line-"

As I went into panic mode, I felt her hands grace my back and pull me back onto the bed.

"Shh, just wait." She said quietly, kissing my cheek. "I haven't gotten to see you all day."

I turned, looking into her eyes and her beautiful, pure smile. "Dinner tonight?" I whispered.

She smiled back. "Sounds good to me."

"Good." I kissed her nose. "I love you Abby."

"I love you too, Joshie." I could have stayed in that moment all day, but reality was pulling me back. I peeled myself away from her touch slowly and put on my clothes with her still sitting on the bed.

Rob had texted me a few times, because of course I was late. He should just be used to this by now, waking up to Abigail was like waking up to a fresh cup of tea. I had to take her in for a moment, let her sink into my skin. She was something to be appreciated.

"I'll see you tonight then, love." I said, kissing her cheek before walking out the door.

I loved Abby. She was beautiful, and she loved me too. Everything felt right with her. But there was always something wrong, like throughout those perfect moments there was something in the back of my spine biting at me. And no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't shake it off.

I knew what it was, and I knew why it was there. But I wouldn't dare admit it to anyone, not even myself.

Without a thought I forced myself to let go of this bug, as I did everytime. Because I could miss that girl everyday for a year (which I nearly had), but she would never come back. It was a tough reality to face, but I could never have my LA girl again.

We'd lost each other, for good.