About a Girl

"That was fucking amazing," Alex exclaimed as he picked me up and twirled me around.

"Whoa, slow down. Still sick from earlier," I laughed.

"Sorry," he chuckled as he put me down back on my feet. I stumbled a bit. "You ok there," he laughed. "How much did you have?"

"Mmm, counting the beers from earlier," I tired counting with my fingers, "I can't remember," I slurred while giggling.

"You're gonna have a fucking hangover in the morning," he laughed at me.

I blew a raspberry at him. "Don't ruin my fun," I pouted. "Now lets put the equipment back."

The guys didn't let me help them, instead they told me to go help Astrid and Flip pack up the merch. They both congratulated me and said that about five guys asked if I was single.

"Eww, why would they ask that," I said as I folded up some shirts.

"In their words, you were 'hot' ", Astrid laughed as she watched me make faces about guys perving on me.

"Think about it this way," Flip said as she looked at me, "Each of them bought an E.P."

"I guess that's good," I mumbled.

After everything was packed up all the bands were hanging out together in the bar area of the venue. It was loud and seemed as though everyone had a drink in their hand. People were mingling, laughing, and just having a good time. I felt a little lost. The incident earlier at the restaurant was still bugging me.

They're laughing at you.

"What're you doing standing around like a weirdo," Erik said as he and Emil wrapped their arms around me. They were both drunk. I could smell the alcohol on their breaths.

"I feel dizzy." That wasn't a total lie, just the not the real reason why I was acting awkward all of the sudden.

"C'mon," Emil slurred to my left.

"Let's party," Erik finished for him.

*********************************************
I could spend my lifetime getting high
Never wanna live in a suit and tie
Most of us are just livin a lie
That’s why we get fucked up every night

"Uhh," I groaned as my hand immediately went to my head. I felt like a sledgehammer was slamming against my head and the damn music wasn't helping at all. "Must you have it so loud," I groaned.

"It's barely loud enough for me to hear," I heard Bo laugh from the driver seat. I remember something about Alex saying Bo was the designated driver, so he was gonna get wasted. "Here," he said as he handed me a bottle of water followed by a bottle of ibuprofen.

"Thanks," I muttered. My mouth was so dry and my breath was fowl. I felt sick to my stomach and I just wanted to be in my bed. That was when I realized I was on the floor of the van again and I had been resting my head on the center console. Guess I really did like this spot. I turned my attention back to Bo, "What happened last night?" My voice shook. I was sort of dreading the answer.

"Don't worry, nothing bad happened," he laughed.

I was shocked. "But ho-,"

"Your voice gave it away."

"Ok, well if nothing bad happened, then what did happen?"

"You drank more with Erik and Emil, talked with the other members of the other bands, and...you just had fun."

I smiled slightly as he said the last part. I was happy last night. I don't care if it was alcohol induced, I was happy and having fun. I just wish I could remember it.

"Oh, and you and Erik almost kissed."

I almost spit out the water that I was drinking. Instead, I just started choking. Then I felt someone patting me on my back. It was Emil. Everyone was still asleep.

"Shit. Are you okay. Breathe Chels breathe."

Once I finally calmed down I looked at Bo with wide eyes. "We almost what," I managed to choke out.

"Shhh, other people are still hungover," Emil exclaimed as he rested back in his seat and closed his eyes.

"Please tell me your fucking with me," I begged Bo.

He just laughed at me. He fucking laughed at me. "Relax Chels, it's nothing serious. You both were pretty wasted and if you didn't remember then I doubt Erik will remember."

"But what about the others?" What if everyone saw me as just some groupie. Not everyone knows that I was just invited along for the Texas dates.

"Everyone was too wasted to even realize what was happening around them,'' he tried to reason with me. "Don't fret over it. There's people on this tour that have done worse."

I could only nod my head and sighed as I rested my head against the center console. I slowly drifted back to sleep.

"Wakey, wakey," said an annoying voice.

"Umm, leave me alone," I groaned as I lashed out at whoever was bothering me.

"Fine then, you don't eat," the person said in a hmph.

I opened up one eye to see Erik and Emil smiling down at me. 'What are ya'll eating."

"McDonald's," they said at the same time. It was kind of creepy.

I made a face at what they said.

"It's better than nothing," Emil explained.

I nodded my head as I got out of the van. The first thing I noticed was how extremely bright it was. I quickly shielded my eyes from the bright rays.

"Here," Erik handed me some sunglasses while Emil handed me a bottle of mouth wash.

I raised my eyebrow at the mouth wash.

"Your breath taste disgusting, right," Emil said.

I nodded my head and smiled at them gratefully.

"We'll meet you inside," they both said. Again, creepy.

I did my business and just stood outside for a moment. It's only been a day that I've been with these guys and so much has happened. I've freaked out, probably embarrassed myself in front of everyone, and told a total stranger my life story. And I've come to terms that I loved every minute of it. It made me sad that today was gonna be the last day I could hang out with them. I was gonna miss them.

I finally walked into the McDonald's to see that the whole group was already sitting at two conjoined tables. I smiled as I made my way towards them. They were all in a heated discussion that I will never know about, because as soon as they saw me they stopped talking. Great way to make me fucking paranoid.

"Hey Chelsea," Erik said in a funny voice. "Sit," he motioned towards the seat next to him.

They're talking about you behind your back

Just like the kids in school.

They're gonna laugh at you.

I tried to ignore the voice in the back of my head and sat down. It took all my willpower to not just get up and run away. All of the sudden some beer sounded really good right now.

"Hey, are you even listening to us?"

I looked up to see everyone staring at me expectantly. Why won't they stop staring. "I-I'm s-sorry. What?"

"That's what I thought," Alex said with a smirk. "We were asking if you'd play with us tonight again?"

"Uh, yeah, sure. Sounds fun."

"Good," he smiled as they all went back to eating.

I felt like an idiot. Why does everything get to me so easily. I looked down at the burger Erik had placed in front of me. I wasn't hungry anymore.