Chance Encounters

I remember that day like the back of my hand. The sky was dull and gray, making the world seem even drearier. The trees swayed back and forth, singing a silent song throughout the courtyard. Tears were pasted onto everyone’s cheeks, making their faces look pink and blotchy. Sobs were heard through the entire service. Women held handkerchiefs tightly in their grasp. They were so tight, in fact, that their hands were turning white and their veins were popping out.

After the service, I walked up to the casket and peered inside. Between the red velvet fabric laid a worn out looking woman. Her eyes were closed, but held lines so deep they were almost like gashes, making her seem even more vulnerable. Her hair tumbled across her small shoulders in waves. It was a little darker than mine. Her lips were thin and shriveled up, like she was pouting or disagreeing with something. People always told me I had her lips. Her hands drifted over her body, calm and comfortable. She was wearing a long satin dress with flowers printed on it. She always told me it was her favorite, and she would wear it every Sunday when we went to church.

I wanted to cry, but I was so desensitized that I couldn’t. She taught me that sometimes you need to be strong, even if everything else around you is falling apart. And that’s what I was doing. She was the one person I had ever loved in my life. She had always told me I was the only reason she was here. She made me happy. She let me be who I was without any judgment.

I played with the rose in my fingers, purposely cutting myself between its pricks. I was the one that should’ve been in that casket. She had never done anything to harm anyone. I was the one driving the car. I was the one that had not seen the driver coming straight for us. Although if she were here, she would’ve told me it was the other person’s fault. I knew it was mine. I would feel guilty for the rest of my life.

Who cared if he was drunk? I should’ve seen the car. I should’ve moved before he hit us. I remember hearing her sharp scream as the car door molded into her chest, squishing her. It was a miracle that she managed to look so beautiful on the day she was buried. But then again, she was always beautiful. She was the most ravishing woman in the world. Her smile could bring crowds. Her sparkling eyes could bring tears. Her long hair could impress anyone. Her tender hands could touch you and instantly make you happy. Genuinely happy.

I sighed and decided I had spent too much time with her. Everyone had already left. I set the rose outside the casket, making sure that she would be able to sense me near her. I took one last glance. I thought that she had fluttered her eyelids, but realized it was just my mind. She was gone. I was here. It was so unfair. Why couldn’t the day be reversed? Why couldn’t I go into some parallel universe and change the inevitable?

I stood on my toes and leaned over the casket. I took in the smell, the overwhelming scent of death. But beyond that, there was something stronger. It made me realize that she was still there. She was just watching over me, like she had when I was little, making sure I never got hurt. I kissed her forehead lightly, feeling her tender skin beneath mine. I winced in the thought. I pushed myself back and rotated myself on my feet.

This was it.

“Goodbye mom.”

~~~*~~~
“Luke, get your ass up!” My dad ordered through the door. I sighed and pulled the covers off my lanky body. I hadn’t eaten much in the past two months. It was too depressing to do anything. Whenever I did something, I thought about how mom would do it ten times better. I needed to impress her. I needed to make my life perfect. I needed to be able to live without her. It was so unbearably intricate though. Mom always told me how to do everything. And if I did it wrong, she would laugh and show me again. She never gave up on me. My dad did though. He gave up on me the moment after I was born. But he stayed because of her.

I would rather him leave me. I didn’t want to be with him and his idiotic girlfriend that could’ve easily been my sister. She was seven years older than me. My mother hadn’t even been deceased for two months. I utterly despised my dad. He was the worst person in the world. He didn’t even care that my mom was gone or that I was starving myself to death.

I got out of bed and quickly dressed into dark skinny jeans and a white v-neck. I combed my hair, making it look somewhat decent. Walking out of the door, I tripped over one of my father’s newspapers. I walked out into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of orange juice. I decided I would have to at least drink something.

“Shouldn’t you be leaving?” Torri, my dad’s girlfriend, asked. She glared at me, sizing me up. No one had even noticed I had lost twenty five pounds. I didn’t have much more to lose.

“Shouldn’t you be on the streets, waiting for a man to actually fuck you? Oh wait, never mind, my dad already does that,” I said. She didn’t know I knew she had once been a prostitute. It was so obvious though. All of the clothes she wore were degrading.

Torri scoffed. “Whatever, get out of here,” she exclaimed, throwing me my backpack. I nodded and waved goodbye. Today was the first day of school. And although I wasn’t freaked out, I definitely didn’t want people staring at me.

When I got there, I went into the office and received my schedule. I found my locker in the sophomore hallway, obviously. I opened it and threw my bag in, taking out my binder. Peering down at my schedule, I read that my first class was English. My mom loved English. She loved writing. She loved literature. She would read to me every night up until I was ten. My dad always called me a big baby because she did that, but I didn’t care. I loved how devoted she was to me.

I got into the classroom and was called over by the teacher. She handed me a card. I stared at it with a confused expression until I realized it was like a card game. After a couple of minutes of struggling, I finally found my seat. The bell rang when I had sat down.

I was so tired I didn’t even notice the students yelling across the room. I hadn’t gotten much sleep since my mom passed. Besides, my dad and his girlfriend fucked every chance they got. They thought I didn’t know, but they were right next door to me. It was hard not to notice. They were extremely rambunctious. It made me want to puke.

I lay my head on the cool desk and attempted to get some rest. “That includes you Mr. Jeysen,” the teacher said, slamming a stack of packets on my desk. I had no idea what she said, but I assumed she meant the fact that I was sleeping. I groaned silently and took a packet, sliding the rest of the pile to the girl next to me. Her fingers slipped, however, and all of the paper fell to the ground with a loud and alarming thud. I watched as the teacher turned to me and glared.

Kneeling on my knees, I stuffed the pile back in order and looked up at the girl. As soon as her eyes met mine, her mouth dropped. I didn’t know why. But then my mind clicked. Those lips. I would notice them anywhere. They were pink and perfectly tantalizing. Her eyes were big and chocolate brown. Her hair was a couple shades lighter than mine.

It was Ellie.

“Oh, Oh my God,” she whispered. She narrowed her eyes as she continued to look at me, almost as if she realized I was no longer the Luke she once knew. I shoved the papers in her hands and turned around, focusing on the teacher. The rest of the hour went by monotonously slow. I could feel Ellie’s eyes staring through me. I never once looked at her. It would be too much pain. I wouldn’t be able to talk straight.

The rest of my classes went by pretty quickly. I had art class after English. The teacher was nice, but seemed to be strict if you pushed his buttons too much. After art was history, which made me pass out. I was in luck because the teacher was practically blind and didn’t notice I wasn’t paying attention whatsoever. The bell rang and it was time for lunch. Since I didn’t pack anything, I walked around until I found the cafeteria.

Every table was full except for one in the back. There were a couple of loners, but I didn’t mind. I knew no one would talk to me anyway. I stalked to the back table and felt people turning their heads to peer at me. Some gawked, some scowled, and some had pity. But I didn’t care. It was my life. Why should anyone mind if I lose weight? I wasn’t even close to being anorexic. I was still ten pounds away.

I sat on the uncomfortable bench as I peered through all of the tables. I quickly sorted out the jocks, the cheerleaders, the nerds, and the outcasts. I wasn’t one that usually used labels, but it was like our school was just made for that.

Suddenly, I noticed two hands holding onto the table. I looked up and saw Ellie sitting across from me, smiling. “What are you doing here?” I asked, sounding harsher than I had expected.

“Don’t you remember me?” She asked, her voice sounding lost.

“Yes, but now is not the time,” I replied. Ellie moved around uncomfortably.

“What’s up with you?” She asked.

“People change,” I said. She instantly stopped talking, understanding that we weren’t going to get anywhere.

But I wasn’t being completely honest. I didn’t change.

It was simply the events that occurred.