When It's Broke It's Perfect

It was weird being outside of the hospital, the simplest of things could make Ian appreciate the position he was currently in. Every tree that blurred by the window would send a shiver of excitement down his spine. He was going away from that place. Far, far away. Although he was over the moon that he had been granted permission to escape that hell hole, even if it was only for the weekend, Ian was slightly terrified for his personal safety. Sean may have been deemed legally sane, however that hadn’t stopped his reckless behaviour, especially his driving.

Sean spotted the worry in his friend’s eyes and slowed down dramatically, making the boys lurch forward. If it wasn’t for his seatbelt, Ian would have been smeared across the dashboard. Sean beamed over, then turned his attention back to the road. “Sorry, E.” He chuckled, driving more sensibly now.

Ian rolled his striking green eyes, regaining his composure. “Yeah, whatever, Seanie.” He muttered, smirking as he went back to gazing out of the window. “If you keep that up, I’ll tell Pearl you’re still a loon.”

Sean let out a snort, turning off from the main road and headed down to some quaint, family styled houses. “Any more of that lip, Watkins, and I‘ll march you straight back to the hospital.” He chuckled lightly at the end of his pointless threat and pulled onto a long driveway. “Home sweet home.”

Ian smiled, leaning across the gears to press his lips firmly to Sean’s. “Thank you for this.” He whispered, stroking the blonde’s hair with one hand, while the other kept him balanced. Sean blushed, pulling away, and opened the car door on his side. He moved over to the boot, helping Ian with his cases, before leading him into his house. Ian ran his eyes along the modern looking furniture of the living room. “Nice crib.” He laughed, sitting down on the black leather couch.

Sean fixed his hair in the mirror, then turned back to Ian. “Thanks.” He smiled. As the blonde got closer, the devilish look in his eyes became more apparent to Ian. It looked like Sean hadn’t gotten over his… erm… sexually promiscuous tendencies. Sean bit his lip, then gently pushed Ian back so that he was now laying across the sofa, completely in Sean’s control. The blonde leant forward so that his lips were hovering millimetres away from Ian’s earlobe and began to whisper seductively into his ear. “It’s nice to have you all to myself again, Mr Watkins.”

Ian ran his hands down Sean’s torso and stopped at his hips, dragging him down so that their crotches were pressed firmly together. Sean widened his eyes a little then fumbled to climb off Ian. “Sean?” Ian asked confusedly, pushing himself up on his elbows. “What’s wrong?” It wasn’t like they hadn’t done things like this before. That was practically all that went on when Sean was in the hospital.

Sean shook his head, straightening his shirt. “It’s not right.” He muttered, taking some deep breaths to calm himself.

“Not right?” Ian spluttered, laughing. “What’s not right is you leaving me here with a massive boner!” Sighing, Ian stood up and walked over to Sean, placing both of his hands lightly on the man’s hips. Sean flinched away, going to stand behind the other couch. “Seriously Sean, what am I meant to have done?”

“You haven’t done anything!” Sean snapped back, tugging at his hair violently. “I knew this would be a bad idea, but I missed you!” Confused wasn’t the word for how Ian was feeling right now. What the hell was going on in the boy’s head? Sean looked sadly down at his feet, playing with the sleeves of his shirt. “I kind of… I have a boyfriend, Ian.”

Ian frowned. A boyfriend? He felt his heart shatter, absolute pain took over him. This couldn’t be true. Sean couldn’t pick someone else over the amazing Ian Watkins? “A boyfriend? You must be fucking joking me?” Sean shook his head, sighing. Ian glared. “Who the fuck would you choose over me. Have you seen me? You’re lucky I even look at you, you stupid blonde bastard!”

Sean gulped, nodding. “Ian, that’s your illness talking.”

Ian scoffed, grabbing Sean by the wrist and dragged him forward. He whined and winced at the man’s touch, making him grin evilly. “Oh, what’s that Seanie? Think you’re better than me now you’re out of that dump?” Their faces were centimetres away from each other’s now, Ian’s glare burning into Sean’s terrified eyes. “Don’t even pretend you’re better than me. You’re still the same, ugly, fat, attention seeking brat you’ve always been, and I hope I never see you again.” He whispered, threateningly. Ian turned, storming towards the door and Sean rubbed his wrist tenderly. “I was too good for you anyway.” He laughed, before leaving.

Ian yawned, lurching his eyes open. It must be illegal to wake up at such an ungodly time in the morning. He trailed his eyes over to the clock on his and Oli’s wall. 6AM, figures.

Knowing he wouldn’t be able to sleep after that joyful little dream, Ian decided to get ready for the day. He slumped over to his chest of draws and opened them, pulling out some black skinny jeans and a white shirt. He dragged on his clothes, then looked over to Oli, he must have been hearing voices because his eyes were scrunched up in pain. Poor guy. It was better to leave him asleep though.

Ian kind of wished he wasn’t getting better, that way he wouldn’t feel sorry for the other patients. That whole ‘Poor Oli’ thing wouldn’t have happened a few months ago, but that’s what Sean Smith does to you.

Ian smiled at the boy’s name. He was glad that his dream was in fact just a dream. The though of hurting Sean like that was unbearable. That cutie.

Shaking his head at his pathetic thoughts, Ian opened his bedroom door and closed it quietly behind him so he wouldn’t wake Oli. See, he was getting soft. Smirking, Ian walked down the corridor until he past the medical bay. The light was on inside, meaning shit had gone down.

Alex was sat on the bed, he arm being bandaged up by one of the new nurses. She was a total flirt, but kind. Ian liked her. He waited outside the bay until Alex finally strolled out, waving goodbye to the nurse. “And what have you been up to.” He sighed, taking Alex by surprised.

The American shrugged and pointed to his wrist. “Same as usual.” He chuckled, doing a slashing motion with his hand.

“That isn’t funny.” Ian scolded, then yawned again. “I hate being awake.”

“I hate being alive.”

Ian stopped and turned to Alex. “You don’t mean that.”

“Don’t I.” He scoffed, his eyes looked sad though and Ian could see tears pooling. “Everyone’s getting better, apart from me. Sean’s gone, you’ll be next, then Josh and Jack and Oli. Then I’ll be alone.” He whispered.

Ian sighed and took the boy’s hand. “Listen, you know that isn’t true. Oli’ll be here forever because he’s that mad, Josh is too fucked up to stand in an unorganised room and Jack loves the attention of being in a mental hospital. None of them are leaving. Plus, I’ll visit.” Ian inwardly kicked myself, realising how dickish that sounded. “I mean, it won’t be that bad.”

“You’re an ass, you know that, right.” Alex frowned, pulling his hand away. Ian nodded smiling, and followed him to the television room.