Jeah, Whatever

[Ryan]

It had been three months since Detroit and spending time with Natalie had become more and more scarce with both our jobs picking up more and more, but as the holidays began approaching, I knew I would be seeing her for two whole weeks.

We would be spending Christmas apart with our respective families but the day after Christmas, the two of us were jetting off and taking a trip to the Greek Islands. Far enough away from everything.

Natalie told me for Christmas she just wanted to go away, no gift necessary but I was going to get her something anyways. I just didn’t know what.

I went to the mall with my mom in search for the perfect gift for Natalie.

“Ryan, what are you really doing with Natalie?” My mom asked, I stopped looking at the necklaces in Tiffany’s when she asked.

“Ma, we’ve talked, I really care for her,” I said.

“Ry, she just doesn’t fit in our family, and every weekend, you’re off visiting her in this city or that one, training earlier mornings so you can catch her on her before work, what’s she even doing for you?” She asked. I started getting mad.

“Look, mom, she visits me too but my schedule allows for more than hers travel wise and like you told me, if I like a girl as much as I care for Natalie, I better be ready to give it all up. I’m not even giving up anything but yet you think I give up too much and she doesn’t fit our family because you girls won’t let her, Devon loves her, Brandon is a child so doesn’t really care,” I snapped, I walked out of the store and away from her.

Me and my mom never fought and when we did it was over little things, this was the first big fight we had since I was a teenager.

“Ryan, can you please just listen to what is happening here?” She said coming out after me.

“No, I can’t because you know, I’m finally happy with a girl who’s worth it and not a backstabbing whore, and you can’t be happy. Yeah we don’t live near each other, that sucks but what sucks more, is I don’t even have my family to support me,” I said, leaving her once more.

It broke my heart to know that my mom and sisters didn’t like Natalie. The girl I actually saw something with. So what do I do? Listen to my family, break up with her? No, then I’d be even more heartbroken. Natalie was a girl that I saw myself falling in love with. Do I tell my family to screw off and live happily with Natalie? That would hurt just as much. This situation is what Natalie would refer to as a catch-22. I was stuck in a place where both scenarios would suck.

I pulled out my phone and saw I had a text from Natalie.

-getting A from the airport! So excited to spend time with Andy before our TRIP! :)- it read. I looked at the message and a photo message followed as I was responding with a picture of her and her sister together, bundled up in the New York weather with a message saying -!!!!- and that was it. I smiled, happy that she was doing well right now, that her heart hadn’t been crushed by her mother.

“Look, Ryan, I’m sorry. Maybe we aren’t being fair to Natalie, you clearly see something in her that me and your sisters don’t, we’re going to try and be better,” my mother said when she finally found me.

“It would mean a lot to me, Ma, I can’t not see her, I’m crazy about her,” I admitted. My mother pulled me into a hug in the middle of the mall.

“You’re falling in love, Ry,” she smiled up at me. I took my mom by the shoulder and led her around the mall to find the perfect gift for Natalie.

I went to Harry Winston. Walking in, people were trying to show me engagement rings but that was not happening, we haven’t even said I love you yet. I began to look around at the other rings and spotted one that I knew I wanted Natalie to wear.

“I want that one,” I said to the woman simply. She looked at me a little shocked.

“Sir, this is a 3 carat ruby ring with 92 half carat diamonds surrounding the band, $35,000 ring,” she expressed.

Woman, my grillz cost more than that.

“Great, sounds like a perfect gift, I’ll take it, I don’t know the girls ring size though,” I said honestly.

The woman stared at me in awe and paused. A man interjected in this sale.

“Sir, if the lady in question has ever shopped at Harry Winston, we will have her sizing on file,” he informed me, the lady just nodded as she was still surprised I’d drop this much on a ring for a guy my age.

“I guarantee this girl has been here,” I smiled at the man and told him Natalie’s name, who had of course been to Harry Winston. Her size was a standard 6 apparently so I was able to walk out with the ring, being warned to be cautious of my surroundings while walking around with it. I nodded, not really worried about being robbed on the up-scale side of Orlando.

“Ryan, that’s a very lovely gift,” my mother said as we walked to my car.

“I know, for a very lovely girl,” my mother had nothing negative to say which made me pleased.

I called Natalie that night, listening to how her day had gone, she sounded much more relaxed now that she was on vacation and her sister was back from Stanford. Natalie informed me that Andrea and Nathan were still talking but not yet dating because Andrea was unsure about how he felt that she had slept with Conor, I felt bad for the girl.

“And what did you do today, sweetie?” She asked me, I rolled my eyes as she called me sweetie.

“I went shopping with my mother, baby,” I said, knowing she hated when I called her that.

“Andy and I went today too! I got some great things, you’ll see I’m sure,” she laughed, I imagined she was laying on her bed, messing with a piece of her hair as she talked to me.

“Oh I can only hope, sooner rather than later,” I grinned as she talked to me more about her day and the things that she and Andrea would do tomorrow. After we hung up, Natalie sent me a picture message of herself that could kill a man.

She was in a red-laced bra and matching underwear that I could see her nipples through. She wore her hair up in an intricate braid and smirked into the camera a little bit.

-sweet dreams, ry lo- she wrote in a text underneath the picture.

Yes, being away from my girlfriend for so long was extremely difficult especially with a girl that looked like that.

Soon Christmas came and the whole Lochte family was together at my mothers house. My sisters came with their husbands, bringing my niece with them. My dad spent time with us on Christmas Eve so today it would just be us kids and mom. My sisters were much nicer about Natalie and everything went better than expected. When the night ended, I packed my things to prepare for my trip to Greece with Natalie and packed the little black box with a tiny red ribbon in my bag.

I said goodbye to my family bright and early as I headed out for the JFK where I would meet Natalie once again after a long time apart. When I arrived to the JFK, I searched for her at the terminal where our plane would be meeting us. I saw her, standing with her carry on bag. She wore one of those cute barets and had newly found waves in her hair. She had a peacoat and scarf on and skinny jeans with tall leather boots. I couldn’t help but admire the beauty she was, even bundled up for New York winter.

“Hello my darling,” I said a little creepily. She looked up and saw it was me and threw herself in my arms.

“Gaah, Ry-bear, it’s been so long,” she said pulling me into a deep kiss.

I tried not to think about the fact that lately Natalie was into all these nicknames.

“Jeah, I know, I missed you so much,” I said, as I held her waist and walked towards a private terminal. She rolled her eyes.

“Whatever, every time you say that dumb word, you get a nicknamed,” she smiled, hating the word that I grasped onto. I took her carry on from her and we made our way to meet the private plane.

After the plane took off and we got the okay to unbuckle, I pulled Natalie on my lap and kissed her neck and felt up her shirt.

I had missed her so much. Her touch, her scent, the way she bit her lip and picked at me. As our kissing got heated, I pulled away and reached into the bag next to me.

“Natalie, I kind of got you something,” I said handing her the small box. She looked at me and then the box and got confused.

“No, I didn’t get you THAT something, just open it,” I said not wanting to explain.

Natalie pulled the ribbon off and opened the box and gasped.

“Ryan Lochte, you got me a Harry Winston ruby, oh my gosh!” She screamed. She pulled the ring out and threw the box on the ground. Placing it slowly on her right hand, I thought she was going to lose her mind.

“Merry Christmas, Natalie,” I grinned, knowing I picked out the perfect gift for her. She pulled away from me and went into her carry on and handed me multiple boxes.

“I didn’t spend nearly as much as this ring but I also got you stuff,” she said, I had never seen her smile brighter. I pulled her back onto my lap and opened the gifts she had given me with her.

The first gift was a pair of shimmering gold high top shoes. Shoes that Natalie would absolutely hate seeing me in and hate me wearing but she knew that I would love them. I felt like it was her saying more how much she was okay with me being myself. I looked at the bottom of the shoe and saw that my name was on the bottom, just like my green ones.

“Natalie, this is seriously wonderful,” I said as I rubbed her inner thigh.

“It’s for my golden boy,” she smiled. I opened the other box and saw that she had gotten me an extremely great pair of headphones. They were the soundproof, crazy headphones that I had my eyes on for a while but never seemed to get and I knew she knew that.

“And because I know you wanted them and you need them to focus before races,” she told me. I kept rubbing more of her inner thigh as a way of showing gratitude.

The last box was smaller, I opened it and was incredibly surprised at what she had gotten me.

“Natalie, this might be the two things you hate most about me in one,” I said shocked.

“Yes, they are, but it’s you and I don’t hate you,” she said.

Natalie had gotten me a customized grill. The grill itself was gold plated, which is extremely hard to get someone to do. In the grill were diamonds that spelled out my infamous word “jeah” on the front.

“I told you, not as fabulous at this gorgeous Winston but I wanted you to like it,” she explained. I set my gifts down and moved her so she was straddling me in my seat.

I loved private airplanes. More room, no people.

I pulled Natalie’s sweater off from over her head, her hat came off with it. I traced her breasts lightly with my fingers and watched as she tilted her head back. I squeezed tightly and grabbed onto her firmed nipples, causing a noise to erupt from her mouth. I smiled at my effect on her.

She rested her head on the crook of my neck as I bent down to kiss the top of each breast. Natalie, pushed herself more onto me, if that were even possible.

The attendant wouldn’t be checking on us for a few hours, we certainly had time to have a little fun.

Natalie stood to remove her pants and with them came her underwear. I stood and pulled my jeans off as well as she removed my sweater. Natalie pulled me out of my underwear and slowly lowered herself onto me.

We both immediately gasped a little, remember what it felt like to be with one another intimately again. I watched as she bounced up and down on me, taking all of her in, feeling her insides tighten against me. I grabbed on to her bouncing boobs, loving every moment she moved herself in and out of me, allowing me to just enjoy the work she was now doing. I felt as she moved faster and her walls got tighter, I felt that I was ready to let go as well.

Natalie made one last whispering hiss as she collapsed onto me, tired but satisfied. While we were both pleased, I wanted to play around some more. She sat on my lap, resting her head on my chest as I moved my hands to her center, rubbing her gently. Not going for speed, not going to cause her to erupt, just some casual play.

“That’s a first for us,” she smiled, pulling me into a kiss.

“Yes, it is, we have certainly had our fun in other places,” I smirked, as I continued to stroke her.

“Showers, pools, hot tubs, your car, club bathrooms, wow, we have sex in too many places,” she laughed. Natalie got up from her position and got re-dressed, this time in Greek weather ready clothes. I also got re-dressed and the flight attendant came in to check on us.

“Miss Crenshaw, can I get you guys anything?” She asked.

“No, we’re fine, Stephanie, if you could just turn on some overhead music, I’d like to sleep the rest of the way,” Natalie yawned. I pulled her down to the seat beside me as she rested her head on my shoulder so she could sleep.

As Natalie slept I thought about the word love. How intense of a word it is, how heavy of a word that it is. I can easily say things like I love swimming, I love competing because honestly, I do love those things. But when it comes to telling a human I love them, I freeze up. How is it easier to love something that doesn’t have feelings over something that does?

Because these un-human things can’t reject my love, they don’t have feelings, someone like Natalie has feelings, she could say she doesn’t love me or she could be lying about the fact she loves me in return.

And what if I really didn’t love her? What if I was just infatuated by her? Falling for her for all the wrong reasons like I did for every other girl? I didn’t want to get hurt like that again.

But this was Natalie we’re talking about. She wasn’t those girls, she wasn’t a liar. She was more than any of those girls could ever be. A working woman with her own money. A woman who was independent aside from me and these times apart proved that she didn’t need to rely on me for everything, that we could both do what we want and still work as a couple.

The more I thought about it, the more I was sure, I loved Natalie, and this vacation, I wanted to tell her.