The Dilemma.

3 and 1/2 months into tour.

“Rae! Georgie and I are going shopping want to come?” Laura stuck her head in my bunk.
“Nah, I think I’m just gonna be lazy today.”
“You just don’t want to put on pants.” She shook her head at me and left again. I was about to pull the blanket back over my head when I heard the curtain open again, this time it was Dan. He crawled in and lay next to me for a bit.

“You aren’t going shopping with the girls?”

“Nah. Don’t wanna put on pants.” He laughed at me.

“So what are you gonna do?”

“My plan was doing nothing until you guys play tonight, then watch you, come back do nothing.” I laughed.

“Well, Matt and I are going to walk around for a bit. Wanna come?” He raised an eyebrow at me.

“Daniel, I’ll be fine. Go spend time with your Asian.” I rolled my eyes at him as he kissed my cheek.

“Love you.” He whispered.

“Love you too. Now go. I’m going to take a nap.” I pushed him away as I grabbed one of the several pillows I stole from his bunk and curled up to it.

“I’ll see you when we get back.” I fell asleep before he was out of the bunk all the way.
--
“Squirt!” I felt someone poke the side of my head; I rolled over and looked at Chris. He smiled at me before helping me down and handing me a cup of coffee.

“I like it when you wake me up. You’re the only one who brings me coffee.” I took a sip of the coffee. It literally the best stuff ever. Not even joking. I don’t know how Chris makes it so well since he doesn’t even drink coffee.

“Because no one else makes your coffee right, the last time Matt made you coffee you threw it at him.”

“I do not remember this.” I held up my hands as we walked down the stairs and I started getting food out for me.

“It was yesterday.” He shook his head at me before we started making food then decided we needed a brother/sister day. We haven’t had one of those in a while. We went back upstairs and I got a piece of paper out of one of my notebooks. “What are you doing?” I grabbed a marker and some tape before getting into his bunk.

“Making a sign.” I quickly wrote. “We’re having actual conversation don’t come in unless you want me to yell at you.” Signed it and taped it above his bunk.

“That was real nice.” He laughed at me.

“Well, that way we can have an actual conversation without Max and Josh trying every ten minutes to figure out what we’re talking about.” He nodded and we just stared talking about how much I’ve changed in the time I’ve been with them, how my writings improved, how close the two of us had gotten. I told him that right now, it didn’t matter if I ever found my real brother or not anymore I had him. Which brought me to this.

“Chris. I’m gonna show you something.” I said

“What’s that Squirt?”

“A picture.” He nodded and I reached and got my picture albums out of my bunk before getting out the picture of my brother and my dad, holding it in my hands. “So, I haven’t shown this to anyone else. Not even Dan ok?” I handed him the picture, he studied it for a while with wide eyes. Then a strange look crossed his face for a fraction of a second.

“Holy. Fucking. Shit.”

“What?”

“You know him.”

“What? Yeah, we both do.”

“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!” I yelled.

“Can I get Max?” He looked at me with pleading eyes.

“Why?”

“Trust me Rae.” I knew that he had a good reason when he called my Rae. He only does that when he is being extremely serious about whatever it is we’re talking about.

“Okay.” He half-smiled at me and jumped out of his bunk, and returning with Max shortly.

“Show him.” Chris said as they got in the bunk.

“Show me what?”

“A picture.”

“Chris, I don’t-” I was cut off

“Rae. Please.” I really hate it when he does that. I handed Max the picture. “Look at her dad.” He whispered to Max. I saw Max’s eyes go straight to where Dad was, they got huge.

“No way. That’s-”

“I know.”

Max started shaking his head back and forth “But it can’t be. There’s no way that that’s-” He was cut off once again.

“But it is and you know it just as well as I do.” Then realization of some kind crossed over Max’s face

“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!?!?!?!” I screeched.

“Tell her.”

“Well, uhm, I mean, shit.”

“Just tell me Max.” God, if he doesn’t tell me, I’m going to kill him.

“I’myourbrother.” He said extremely fast.

“Wait what?”

“He’s your brother.” Chris said, I sat there for a few minutes letting it process, and then after is where I bust out in tears. “And this is my time to leave you two alone.” Chris hugged me and kissed my head before jumping out of his own bunk. Max just sat there, for a minute or so before I was practically tackled into a hug. I know it’s probably because I know he’s my brother now but it felt different, than hugging him before. It was a bit like hugging mom again. We sat there for what felt like an hour. Then finally Max spoke. “Why are you crying?”

“I don’t know.” I half laughed.

“Are you happy?” I nodded into the hug

“We have a lot to talk about later.” He pulled me out of the hug and stuck out his tongue at me. I laughed at him. “Was that a laugh, and a smile?” He mocked; I rolled my eyes and stuck my tongue out at him. “There she is, that’s the Rae I know and love to piss off.” He threw his arms up dramatically.

“Shut up Max.”

“I have 21 years of annoying you to catch up on you think that I’m going to listen?” He stuck his tongue out at me. Again. “So can we tell the guys?”

“But I look like crap.”

“No you don’t.” I glared at him. “Pleaaseeee?” he begged.

“Ugh, fine. But how are we going to tell them.” I groaned. We started talking about how would be the best way to tell them. After we had decided that he jumped down, and then of course help me down out of the bunk. We walked downstairs with his arm around my shoulder. When we got to the front longue Chris, Matt and Josh were there. Chris looked up and smiled really big at me. I smiled back at him.

“So, where’s Dan?” I asked.

“Why?” Josh asked.

“Cause Max and I have something to tell everyone, and Dan needs to be here.”

“I think he’s upstairs.” I nodded and walked to the end of the stairs.

“Dannieeelllll, come here please?” I called out.

“You need to stop making the poor boy think he has a chance now Rae.” Matt shook his head at me

“I never said he didn’t.” I winked at Chris.

“I knew it!” Dan said. He started dancing in a circle.

“I never said you did either though.” He pouted.

“What did you want?”

“Sit.” He sat down beside Josh.

“So what’s this all about?” Matt asked.

“Well, it’s about my brother.”

“What about him?” Josh looked at me.

“I’ve found him.” I saw Chris smirk at me, Max looking really smug.

“WHAT WHERE?!?! I WANNA MEET HIM!” Matt and Dan shouted out. Josh just sat there with a shocked expression.

“What would you say if I told you that you already know him?” Max threw in.

“Wait Max knows?” Josh asked. I looked at Max and his eyes were bright, then I realized, Mom.

“There’s a reason Max knows.” I said.

“Why’s that?” Dan looked really confused now.

“Cause I’m her brother.” He said. Then everything went quiet. Chris had a huge smile on his face, Max had me gripped me into a bear hug and my arms were wrapped around his waist. Dan was looking in between Max and I, trying to figure something out, Matt was doing some sort of math in his head apparently because he was counting on his fingers, and Josh. Oh josh. He was just sitting here, staring. This ridiculous look on his face.

“IS ANYONE GONNA SAY ANYTHING!?!?!” I shouted out making Max wince slightly, as Georgie, Laura, Nyx, Austin, Alan and his bird, Anna I think it is, walked in.

“Uh-what?” Georgie looked took in the situation looking at each person. “So Chris, Rae and Max knew something and told the three of you. It was big. What the fuck happened?” She looked between the three of us.

“I would suggest sitting down.” I said.

“Oh, thank god my feet are killing me.” Nyx dropped down on to the couch carefully before Austin sat down beside her, Alan bringing Anna with him when he sat.

“Why?” Laura looked at me with confusion apparent on her features.

“Please?” Max pouted at her making her sit down as Georgie took a seat on Chris’ lap.

“So, what’s this news?” Austin looked around at us.

“So, you all know the general story about my dad and brother right?” I looked at all of them

“I don’t?” Laura raised her hand.

“Well long story short, shit went down between mom and dad, mom moved to NC had me, dad and brother stayed over on this side of the world. Never really looked for him, but guess what? I found him.”

“That’s great!” Georgie looked really excited jumping up and down, Nyx was looking at Max and I’s position studying us, Alan, Anna, Austin and Laura were looking up at us expectantly.

“Are you gonna tell us who it is?” Alan looked at me.

“I can tell you that you know him.” Max got their attention with that, I saw Nyx narrow her eyes at me. Then realization hit her.

“Fucking hell Max is your brother!” She screamed at the top of her lungs, at which point Josh slapped his hand over Dan’s mouth, we had gotten them to be civil enough to stay in the same room with each other without murder just anything could set the other on edge. I nodded with a smile on my face. Max was laughing; everyone else still had general looks of shock on their face.

“How did you find this out?” Josh finally looked up at us. Max looked at me and nodded toward the picture in his hand.

“Should we show them?” I nodded. He handed Josh the picture.

“I’ve seen this photo before?” Josh raised an eyebrow at us. Then handed it over, we all sat in there for about half an hour until Austin and Alan had to warm up taking Nyx and Anna with them, everyone else just disappeared until it was Max and I talking in the living room area ish thing. I had out the other photo album and we were looking at pictures of mom’s before.

“That’s my house. Nothing’s changed at all.” We were about half way through it then and he kept pointing things out in the pictures. We got to one of Mom, Dad and some woman he worked with, though she had been folded out of it when I got it, and I unfolded it. “That’s...” He looked at the picture.

“What Max?” I asked.

“See the woman beside Dad?” I nodded. “Well, that’s, I don’t know what to call her now because of all this. Well she’s the one I thought was my mum.” He looked at the picture. Then I really looked at the picture, how even though dad was ‘with’ mom, you could see who he really wanted. Her.

“Does she make him happy?” I looked at Max.

“Yeah she does.” I just nodded and we went on looking at pictures until time for him to go inside and play. The show was a normal show, did the usual thing, have Dan drag me off somewhere so he can kiss me before he goes on stage, Chris complaining about making up excuses as to where one of us went, though Max was around more. Max and I promised to make tomorrow and us day where we can talk, and figure everything out. The boys ran off stage and tackled me.

“Get off me! You all stink!” I screamed from underneath the mass of sweat and gross.

“But we love you!” Dan shouted over the yelling of the crowd to do an encore.

“Go back out there and please your fans!” I gasped. They all started climbing off of me, Max held out his hand to help me up, for once I took it without any argument. What? I’ll occasionally let him do nice things for me. He is my brother. That will never get old. Max is my brother. Just. He’s my brother.

“Should we?” Chris asked.

“Yeah, I’ve got an idea.” Max looked at Josh with a smile, and whispered something in his ear.

“Yeah, we’re doing this.” He smiled at Max and gathering everyone around whispering to them, then going on to the stage.

“What’s up you guys!” Josh yelled into the mic, “since you lot wanted more songs, we’ll give you three.” The crowd burst out into screams

“So, here’s the deal!” Max said into an extra mic. “How many of you read Kerrang?” More cheers. “See they’ve sent us out with an intern to document this tour. I’m sure you’ve seen pictures of her. Rae get your ass out here!” He looked my direction and I was shaking my head at him. “Don’t you dare tell me no sister! I will come over there and get you!” I was still shaking my head at him. “That’s it, Dan, Chew I need reinforcements.” Max gave his guitar to Jon and Chew his to Dean, Dan sat down his sticks and they all started running towards me. I just braced myself for the eventual impact, which happen then being hoisted onto Chris’ shoulders, brought out on stage, and sat down next to Josh.

“Anyways! This is Rae! And she’s become part of the Sixer family! Show her some love.” Josh told the crowd, who happily obliged. “So, to honor her tonight we’ve gotten insider information about her three favorite songs by us. And lucky for you all, they aren’t on the set list. So enjoy.” Josh pulled me in for a one sided hug, before the rest of the guys tackled me into a hug and let me go side stage. “This first one’s call A Little Bit of Truth.” They launched into the song, making me tear up a bit; they all kept looking at me during a few points during the song. Once it was finished they passed Chew a mic.

“This one, for our dear adopted sister and my favorite Squirt,” he stuck his tongue out at me. “Is called Stay with Me.” They all sent me smiles and stared the song, I sang along to every word, making them laugh as I took turns making fun of each one of them as they played. As they played the closing the cord, several stools got brought out along with Dan’s acoustic drum looking thing. As they set up I realized there was one extra stool in the middle between Josh and Max, Dan on the other side of Josh and Chris on the other side of Max with Matt beside him. Max ran toward me dragging me on to the stage sitting me down on the empty stool. Josh was handed a microphone while everyone else was getting set up with some sound stuff. Josh nodded and started speaking, “So this last song, means a lot to this band, Chris and Dan in particular, but it also means a lot to this girl sitting right beside me, she’s been through a lot, and look how far she’s gotten. She gets to tour with us I mean how much more awesome of a job can that be really?” He laughed when I rolled my eyes. “Anyways, she’s a tough girl, we love her like sister, well some of us.” He coughed and it sounded a lot like Dan when he did. “Anyways, Dan’s infatuation with Rae is not the point. It’s that she has become one of the family in such a short period of time. So this song is for her, this is When We Were Younger.” They started the song, and I brought a foot up under me and sat on it. Max and Chris kept smiling at me; it was about the time when Josh was singing “When I was younger, I never thought. That when I was older, I'd see you give up. Now that I'm older, I carry the torch.” That I started crying and Josh gripped a hold of my hand squeezing it and sending me a soft smile. I smiled back, and looked at Chris his eyes were watering, as were Dan’s. Matt and Max were looking at the three of us with a hint of pride in their eyes. When they finished they song they all tackled me into a hug right there and the six of us were a blubbering mess of tears, laughter, sweat, and smiles. Finally Josh grabbed his mic and said. “We love you all! We are You Me At Six.” And did a little salute before pulling all of us off stage. We stood side stage just hugging, with Georgie, Laura and all the crew joining soon after. We stood there for a while before I got tired of the smell.

“I love you guys and all, but you stink get off me.” I started to wiggle out of peoples grasp and out into fresh air. “Fresh air! OH my god I can breathe!” Then what happened Max tackled me. “Fucking hell you idjit. Get off me!” I tried pushing him off to no avail.

“Dog Pile on Rae!!!” Dan shouted jumping on to the pile, the others soon following. After the mass of jumping on to our human pile, what did Georgie, Laura and Nyx, who walked up during the mass of jumping, do? Sat on us.

“Can you lot get off me!!!” I screamed.

“NO!” Was the response I got, from everyone.

“What is going on?” Tino asked as he and Phil walked up.

“Well, apparently, it’s dog pile on me day.” I coughed out.

“Awesome, I’m gonna take a picture.” Phil laughed, pulled out his phone. I flipped off the camera. I’m sure everyone else was smiling.

“Ok! Get off, the majority of you stink and need showers!” I shouted, and tried to stand up. With Tino and Phil’s help I finally got up leaving everyone else in a pile on the floor. We all stood around and talked for a little bit before heading out to the bus, not before stopping and letting the guys sign stuff for fans. Hell a few people asked Nyx for one, someone even asked for a picture with Georgie and I. That was a bit odd, but nice. We made it to the bus eventually.
--
Max and I have locked everyone else out of the back lounge and only have our phones pillows and computers.

“Max, we need to tell Tina.” I leaned up from my position of hanging upside down off the couch.

“I’ll get your computer; we’ll Skype her upside down.” I laughed out as he got up and got my computer setting it in front of us before lying beside me. It took about five minutes to pull Skype up and call Tina.

“What are you two doing?” She laughed as she saw us on the camera.

“Well, hanging upside down, keeping everyone else out of the back lounge and attempting to tell you important news.” Max stuck his tongue out at her.

“News? What news? Did Josh break up with what’s-her-tit’s yet?”

“Shut up Tina! That is not what this is about! This is about me!” I shushed her.

“Tell me!!!!” She whined, Max laughed at her.

“So, I found my brother.” I shrugged.

“YOU WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!” She screamed.

“I found him, Chris helped.” I said.

“Who the fuck is he!!!”

“Me.” Max laughed.

“WHAT?!?!?!?!?! YOU’VE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME!!”

“Chill out Tina. I’ll fill you in more later ok, just had to let you know.”

“But.”

“Tina.” I shot her a look.

“Fine. But soon.” She glared at me, I smiled at her. “I love you talk to you later.”

“Love you!” I yelled.

“Bye Tina!’ The screen went blank with her shaking her head at us.

“What to do now?” Max looked over at me.

“Probably sit up right so all the blood doesn’t flow to our heads.”

“Might be a good idea.” He laughed and I sat myself up with an oof. “That did not sound fun.” I pushed him off the couch; he pulled it off really well. “Ha! I pulled that off.”

“I commend you for that sir.” I tipped an imaginary hat at him. We sat up for the next few hours and talked.

“Rae. I’m borrreeedddddd.” Max whined at me from the other couch.

“Then go get some foooddd.” I looked at him

“How exactly is that going to help?”

“I dunno," I shrugged. "I always eat when I’m bored.” I flipped myself upside down and looked at him, still not over the fact that he’s my brother.

“You are weird. BUT I JUST HAD THE BEST IDEA EVER!!” He flipped off the couch and jumped up all very dramatically, now I understand where he gets all the drama from, Mom.

“What is this best idea ever you claim to have?” I flipped over and stood up copying his actions.

“Two words.” He grinned.

“Continue dear brother.” I waved my hands at him.

“Dance. Party.” Then came his, I don’t want to say this but I can’t really describe it any other way, evil laugh. Seriously. It sounded evil. But I don’t really think it was intentional.

“Best. Idea. Ever.” I nodded. He pulled up his music and started playing this really loud, really annoying, but the best dancing music ever on. We were being idiots. Complete and utter idiots. Dancing in probably the worst way possible, almost as bad as Josh. Remember almost. Apparently sometime during the two hour dance party we made so much noise that Josh was hounding on the door telling us to shut up. After this was about the time we fell asleep.