The Great Hendowski

By the time two am hit Massachusetts, Tino and Phil were, as you could probably guess, trashed and acting like imbeciles. I remained in the same spot since Shay returned with drinks, and Austin had been reluctant to move, or so it seemed. He too, didn’t get up much, and appeared to have moved closer to me throughout the evening. His arm brushed up against mine when we weren’t that close before…
Shayley sucked down bottle after bottle, still bitter over his and Austin’s tiff earlier and I kept quiet as I sat in between the two. They reminded me of brothers who sometimes spent too much time with one another. I suddenly didn’t envy them as much as I thought I would. It just seemed like they never had time off from each other, always working, always together. I took a moment to appreciate my own apartment. Although I had nosy neighbors, there wasn’t much they could do when the door was closed.
“I want to dance! I feel like dancing,” Alan grinned down at his glass, using his pointer finger to glide around the edge.
“I have a feeling you’re going to ask your drink to dance.” I tried my best to look serious. He glanced up, bloodshot eyes meeting my sober ones.
“I just might, you know. No one here would dance with me,” he replied, looking bashful. Alan had this slyness about him, this mystery. The way his face looked at you would guide you into another world. I couldn’t see myself developing feelings for him, as I was all too familiar with his game. He was definitely a heart breaker, a sass, who, with the right woman, would be just the sweetest thing. And that woman was definitely not me.
“I might dance with you.”
“Really?!”
“Once.” I felt stiff as a board as I nudged Shay to get out of the booth. I stretched as I watched him sit back down slowly, annoyed to be sitting next to one of his best friends. Past Shay’s face, I watched Austin slide his eyes down my frame, stopping at my hips. I blushed as I pulled down the part of the sweater that had risen above my waist.
Alan had made it out a moment later, locking his arm with my own. “Why’s your face all red?”
I took a deep breath, cursing the effects of alcohol on those around me, and shrugged. “I just can’t believe I get to dance with you, finally.”
“Oh, stop it.” Alan slurred, rocking a bit as I held him up as best as I could. “I’m really nothing special.”
“You are special. You’re the best rhythm guitarist in the whole entire universe!”
“My ego is bursting. I won’t remember any of this, will I?”
“Depends. I hope you’ll remember us dancing.”
“Me too.”
We headed over to the crowd, where there was hardly any room to move at all. An electronic beat filled the air, and I wondered if the place was more club than bar. Colors drifted over our bodies as we started off slow. I was already sweating from the stuffiness of the atmosphere, and I was nervous as hell to dance in public. God, it had been so long. But the way everyone around us was moving, I doubted that anyone would care what we were doing.
“Up and down, we gotta go up and down!” Alan shouted as the noise around us got louder, along with other people singing to the song. I laughed my ass off as Alan and I jumped around like high school kids at a dance. His ginger hair flying all over the place, me having to grab his arms so he wouldn’t fall into anyone.
“Watch out, watch yourself,” I giggled as I pulled him up when he attempted a split. His jeans were too tight though, and I thought they’d rip at any moment. A few people watched him, their eyes curious and confused. I loved it, and here I thought that my best moments were going to be with Austin. But my new friend had changed this night for the better. The next song fell into a slow rhythm, good for only a little bump and grind. I put distance between us and made a move to go back to the booth.
“Wait, wait,” he gripped onto my bicep and pulled me close. “This one.”
“Alan, I told you I would dance with you once.”
“One more,” he urged, giving me the puppy eyes. I glanced over at our seats, but only Phil and Tino were there now, immersed in some drunken conversation. But where were the other two? That instantly worried me.
“We should find Shay and Austin.”
“No,” he whined, not loosening his grip around my skin. I rolled my eyes and headed back into the crowd, pulling him along until we were in the depths between everybody else. I didn’t know how to dance like these other women around me. Their hips moving in time with not only the beat, but their partner’s hips. I was out of my element, Alan was drunk, and there was not much I could do at the moment. So I turned on Alan, and backed up.
I felt the slide of his hands over my waist, and then my temperature skyrocketed. Maybe it was the feel of a man’s hands that had me going, or the fact that I wasn’t doing something stressful for once, either way, I started to move, and it felt right. Alan caught on and pushed against me, us grinding against each other to the tempo.
We had moved from the center to the back of the floor, without realizing it. I didn’t let up and neither did Alan, but little did I know that I had an audience. His hands started slipping underneath the ugly Christmas sweater, and I stopped grinding to bring Alan back. I felt he was taking this a little too seriously, and when I looked up in front of me, Austin was leaning against the wall, arms crossed and scrutinizing. I mean, he was really dissecting us as we slowed down.
I turned toward Alan and said, “that was fun. Thanks for the dances, bro.”
He nodded, grabbing a chunk of sweaty hair and swiping it over his forehead. “You’re not half bad.”
“Same goes for you. Tell me you’re terrible sober.”
“Obviously.” He winked, and then walked toward the direction of our booth, oblivious to his band mate hanging low across the way. I tucked a piece of my own sweaty hair behind my ear and headed to Austin.
“Why are you messing with him?” He asked, bitterness hitched to his tone.
“What do you mean? We were just having fun, as friends.” I matched Austin’s pose against the wall.
“Yeah, you think that but what you’re really doing is messing with his head.” He wouldn’t look at me, and maybe, for a second, I regretted dancing with Alan. He knew we were friends, and he knew that the dance meant nothing. But it wasn’t like he would remember much in the morning.
“I doubt it. He’s had quite a bit to drink.”
“I just don’t want to see one of my guys get hurt by a fling.”
“There’s nothing going on with Alan.” My stomach burned, feeling nervous and slightly confused as I tried defending myself. I didn’t know why I had to defend myself. We were adults, capable of making our own decisions. It felt silly to justify my actions to a person I wasn’t even close with.
"I know you and Shay are having some weird thing going on, but can you not take it out on me?"
"It's not about that,” he said so softly, I almost couldn’t hear him with everything else going on. He turned to me finally, and I was once again reminded of his figure. I felt small as his eyes were intense, his height daring and bold. He bit his lip for a second, looking away, contemplating what he would say next.
I sighed, and said, “you guys brought me here to live a little, right? Well, that’s what I was doing. For once, I feel twenty five. Energetic, full of life, I don’t know… just spirited. So let me thank you for bringing me out of my cave.”
“Don’t thank me… thank Alan.”
“Why? Sure, he helped, but you invited me. I could’ve said no, but I didn’t, right?”
He shrugged, putting up his wall again just as I was about to tear it down. I was frustrated, wondering what I could’ve done wrong to make him feel like a lump of shit.
“Well, thank you anyway. I’m going to get a Coke and sit back down with the others.”
Austin nodded, staring off into the distance at something. Maybe nothing. I moved along, heading back to the safe zone, and then I heard him say, “I was supposed to be the one dancing with you.”