Red

All I could do was go through the motions. I felt like such an ass, but Jay assured me that I wasn’t. I had to stop playing the ‘what if’ game in my head. It was driving me crazy. It’d been two months since we left Seattle. Two months since I felt any emotion other than anger toward myself. I put on a front for the guys and for our fans. The media wasn’t nice when they found out Eliza didn’t accompany me back to England. I ignored all the questions about her which made the whole situation a thousand times worse. She was called a one-night stand and I was properly named a playboy.

“Come on Nath, the plane is loading,” Tom smiled and I picked up my bag and followed the fella’s.

We were on our way to film a music video on location. Since the last one we filmed in Ibiza was such a hit we decided to go for it again.

It wasn’t too bad of a flight from London, but long enough for me to drown in my thoughts again. I knew all I needed to do was text her or call her, but Jay’s words rang back in my head. ‘With time Nath’. With time it’ll have to be.

What could I of done differently? Not walked away? I damn myself every day for walking away. I should have stayed and listened to her.

Once we arrived in Ibiza we were thrown right into the video shoot. It took all night, but by sunrise it was a wrap. Quick and easy, just how we liked it.

Since we had a few free days the guys and I decided to have a small holiday on the island to wind down from the whirlwind that was The Wanted. Ever since we debuted ‘I Found You’ our popularity skyrocketed. The song was in the top ten on every continent. That surely wasn’t helping my cause either. Every time we performed that damn song she was all I thought about. The song was written for her after all, and since I said that publically I was always asked about it. On top of all of that I also had to put on shows for Wanted Wednesday. I couldn’t get anything past our fans though. They saw straight through me, even if it was only a five second clip on one of our videos. My twitter was constantly being blown up with ‘well wishes’. While they wished me well they also constantly told me I could do better than Eliza.

Truth was . . . I don’t think I can.

“Come on Nathan, we’re going out. You’re not saying no. Put on clothes.”

I looked up at Siva and did as I was told. I’d give up arguing with the guys. They always won.

The small island off the mainland of Spain was relatively quiet. We were free to roam the streets as we pleased. Bar hoping along the streets close to the port. We heard laughter along one street and Max ran ahead to see if something awesomely amazing was going on. When I turned the corner I stopped dead in my tracks. Half way down the road Eliza came walking down , her arm linked with a man who looked like he could be Siva’s twin brother. She didn’t look like the classic Eliza I had met. Her hair was chin length, her jeans covered in paint, she looked out of sorts. She fell on her butt, clearly drunk and I watched as Max helped her to her feet. They exchanged some words before her eyes locked on me. She turned and ran inside holding the man’s hand. What the hell was she doing in Ibiza and did she really move on so quickly? Sure we were only together for a week, but the tearing in my heart was still present.

I jogged up to where Max was standing. “Was that Eliza?” I shouted just needing confirmation of what I already knew. He didn’t have to answer me, I took a step toward the door she went through but Max stopped me. He put his hands on my shoulders.

“Not now Nath, she’s hammered, we’re drunk. You can find her tomorrow.”

“I’m not gonna wait until tomorrow! Eliza is here in Ibiza! I’ve had enough of this waiting around bullcrap and I don’t care if that’s her new boyfriend. I have to talk to her.”

“What’s going on?” Tom asked as he, Siva and Jay walked up to us.

“Eliza! I just saw her! She’s here!” I stepped away from the guys and held my head in my hands. I wasn’t 100% sure on how I was feeling. Excited? Scared? Enraged?

“Are you going to talk to her?” Tom asked.

“No, he needs to wait until tomorrow. She’s fairly drunk. Plus she’s with some guy,” Max answered.

They all gave me the same look. That look you give when you feel sorry for someone. I couldn’t handle it, I turned to the building she was in and began yelling at the top of my lungs.

“Eliza! I know that’s you! I’ve been miserable Eliza! I can’t not think of you every moment of the damn day!”

I felt Jay’s hand on my shoulder but I shrugged him away. A man walked out of the building and approached me.

“No hagas nada por retener a la mujer que se va ni al pajaro que vuela; deja que el destino se cumpla.”

I looked at him confused, “what does that mean?”

“It means you can’t force someone to love you young man. Especially not by yelling outside at this hour. If she loves you as you do her, she will let it be known. Now I suggest you go home.”

“Mauricio, wait.” I looked past the older man talking to me and saw Eliza approach cautiously.

“Eliza-“

“No Nathan, wait. I don’t know why you’re here and I’m not sober enough to explain why I’m here. Meet me at Plaza del Sol tomorrow at eleven.” With that she turned on her heal and walked into the open, waiting arms of her man.

My heart sank but there was a slight glimmer of hope that she was willing to talk to me after what I had done to her.

“Come on mate, let’s go back to the hotel,” Jay said dragging me away from Eliza’s hideaway.

When we got back to the hotel, Jay followed me into my room. I sat on the edge of the bed and he dragged a chair over to sit directly in front of me.

“How long were you with Megan?” He asked quietly.

“A year.”

“How long did it take you to get over her?”

“I’d say about six months, but she broke my-“

Jay cut me off, “Nath, Eliza was with her ex for eight years. She’d only kicked him out two months before you two met. If it took you six months after just one year imagine what it’d been like to Eliza after eight.”

“She never seemed heartbroken to me though, if anything she was angry when she saw him.”

“I’m not going to tell you her story, she needs to, but just keep that in mind tomorrow when you go to see her.”

“She told you about her past?”

“Everything Nathan. The night you left. You two are good together. I had to use my detective skills to find out what was really going on. Trust me, you can thank me on your stag night,” he laughed. He stood from the chair leaving me alone with my thoughts. I was so anxious for tomorrow how was I ever going to sleep?