Hope Came With Wings

I decided I would finish my junior year in high school. We only have like 2 weeks left.

Even though I was in school now, my head was in a different place entirely. I was thinking of the things I'd bring with me to Seth's. There really wasn't much I needed. Just my ipod, laptop, sketchbook, clothes; nothing too extreme.
For a second, I considered having Seth move into the house with me since it was bigger, but I immediatley decided against it. Too much had happened there. I didn't ever want to go back. I'd probably put the house up for sale instead, but I don't know how that is going to work out. I'm not exactly an expert on real estate! Plus I'd have to hire someone to get rid of everything left in the house. Unless I sell that too. There's always ebay!
Sigh, why is it so difficult?
But after all of this blows over, I'll be with Seth. Maybe he'll be my happy ending.

The bell rang and I jumped up, ready to leave my last class of the day.
"Gracie! Could you wait a second?" Ms. Mills called to me, holding me back.
I looked at her confused, but stayed back anyway.
"Uh, yeah sure. What's up?"

"How are you doing? I know the anniversary of your father's death was like a week ago, I just wanted to know how you're holding up." she asked sympathetically. Not a hint of I'm-just-asking-for-gossip kind of tone in her voice, she actually cared.
But she had no idea what had happened to me. I wanted to lie to her, paint the fake happy picture everyone wants to see. Make her think everything was fine and I was going home to be with my mother as we happily moved on from the death of my father. But I couldn't do it. The fakeness of it all was making me sick, and I just wanted to confess everything to her. It made me cry.

"Oh no, I'm sorry! Here, come sit with me." I sat on top of a desk next to her. " Was it wrong of me to bring it up?"

I sniffed and tried to calm down. "No, i'm sorry it's just, it's really hard for me to control my emotions lately. So much is happened and, I just can't stop crying."

"Gracie, I have a feeling you are talking about more than just your father's anniversary..."

I looked away and slowly nodded my head.
"Actually, the anniversary of my father's death is now also the...the anniversary of my mother's death. They... they both killed themselves on the same day, but a year apart." I whispered, silent tears staining my face. The lie tasted fierce on my tongue. No one except my mother and Seth knew I killed my father. Everyone else thought it was his own hand that pulled the trigger.

"Oh my goodness. I'm so sorry Gracie, I didn't know." She whispered, a frown on her face.

"I know. No one does. She didn't really have any friends, and all of our family is gone, so I didn't really feel a reason to announce it. She's buried next to my father in the cemetery though." I was no longer crying, just staring blankly at the floor.

"So, you are all on your own now? But Gracie, you're only 16. You can't be living on your own. What if something happens? I mean, a lot has already happened but if someone finds out you could be in a foster home and..."

"No! Please Ms. Mills, you can't tell anyone! I'm not alone, I'm actually moving in with my boyfriend today. He doesn't live too far and I'm going back to pack the stuff I need today. Then, I'll probably sell the house or whatever I can. But, please Ms. Mills! If anyone finds out, I will be in a foster home for the next year and a half until I'm 18. I just can't do that, what with what's already happened! Seth is all I have, and I want to stay with him."

She was quiet, watching me and thinking things over. She sighed and let her head droop.
She looked back up at me with a sad smile on her face.
"You're right Gracie. You're almost 17, meaning you'd only be in a foster home for a year. I'm sure this Seth is a good guy if he's letting you move in with him. But, you know I'm suppose to report anything like this I hear." I looked up at her, my eyes begging. I started to argue, but she stopped me.
"But, I've let other things slip before. And I know how hard things have been for you, and I wish you hte best. Let's just pretend this conversation never happened, sound good?" She smiled.

I smiled back and jumped up to give her a hug.
"Thank you Ms. Mills. Something told me I could trust you. I'm glad I can."

"No problem sweetie! I'm always here if you need me."