Sad, Beautiful, Tragic

Madison brushed her teeth for the fourth time as she waited for Alex to pick her up. She had been throwing up stomach acid on and off throughout the morning. Truthfully she wasn’t feeling barely even fifty percent, but she wasn’t going to let her bad health stop her from going to the fair with Alex. She had never gotten the chance to go to a fair before but seeing them on movies, tv shows, and in music videos made her ache to have that experience. She spit the minty substance into the basin and washed the residue from the surface just as the doorbell sounded. Admittedly, she was surprised Alex actually knew she had a front door considering he always threw pebbles at her window to get her attention; she was surprised that her window was even intact anymore.

She took a final glance at herself in the mirror, frowning at her purple-ish pale skin and tired eyes. She smoothed out her black scalloped tank top and adjusted her denim shorts as she slid her feet into her worn pair of chuck taylors.

Madison quickly ran down stairs and opened the door to find Alex standing on the other side, a bunch of mismatched tulips hiding his face. Her lips curved up into a shy smile as her delicate fingers wrapped around the stems, taking the flowers from Alex. She quickly sat them in an empty vase, trusting that her mom would put them in water for her.

“You didn’t have to, ya know?”

Alex felt his cheeks grow warm but shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly “I wanted to, for you. Ya ready, then?” he linked his arm with hers and guided her to the passenger side of his mom’s car that he was borrowing for the night. Madison hummed along to Night Drive by Jimmy Eat World as they drove to the fairground, her hand laced with Alex’s and she couldn’t help but wonder what they were doing.

“Lex?” she broke the silence, her voice quite but unwavering.

He looked over towards her “hmm?” a small smile graced his lips at the use of the nickname she had used.

“Is this a date?” Madison hesitantly asked

“I…ummm, if you want it to be” Alex lamely replied. Madison loosened her hand from his, her smile dropping a little as she left his statement hanging in the air. “If you want it to be,” what did that even mean? She thought to herself. Alex sighed dejectedly as Madison pushed herself closer to the door, closing herself off from him; he learned this was a typical response from her when he managed to say the wrong thing.

Truthfully he didn’t even know why he had said it. Perhaps it was the fear that she was going to reject him but even that would have been better than knowing she was being offstandish because of him.

“Mads, I’m sorry” he finally mustered up the courage to utter the words that he thought would fix everything.

“It’s fine. We’re just friends, right?” Madison asked, setting her hand back into his to reassure him that she held no hard feelings.

“yeah…friends” Alex forced a smile. Of course he wanted it to be a date. Of course he wanted to be more than friends but he was also scared out of his mind. This was new to him. Sure he had dated before and he had his fair share of girlfriends but Madison was different. She made him want to be better, try harder. He wanted her to be happy, always. It scared him how much he cared for her when he knew he would lose her in the end.

“Favorite coffee order?” Alex asked out of the blue. Madison stared out him, confused, but answered anyways “white chocolate mocha, hot or cold depending on the weather.”

“I told you, I want to know everything” he said, explaining his motive behind the offhand question.

Madison felt the butterflies in her stomach take flight. No one had ever said that to her and actually meant it. No one had ever wanted to know her or actively tried to get to know her but here was this strange boy that threw pebbles at her window until she gave in asking to know every part of her being.