Take Me Home

It was a typical Wednesday night for Connor and I. We played at the pub to our biggest audience yet. It seemed the more Connor appeared in the tabloids with Zayn, the bigger the crowd was. As much as I tried to stay out of the spotlight, it didn’t always work. No matter how briefly I came into to contact with any of the One Direction boys it always seemed to end up on the front page of a trashy magazine claiming that I was trapped in a love triangle with Niall and Harry or something just as ridiculous. Of course, it was always worse for Connor since she was actually dating a member of the band.

Once we had finished our set I hoisted my guitar over my shoulder and headed straight to the bar to collect the grocery money that Connor and I were in desperate need of. I leaned against the bar and waited patiently for the owner of the bar to get a second to spare in order to pay me. After a few seconds of people watching he came over and slid me the envelope with a smile. I smiled graciously in return, being as brief as possible in order for him to return to taking orders at the busy bar.

I turned around, tucking the envelop into my pocket and jumped in surprise when Niall appeared in front of me. “Didn’t know you were going to be here.” I said and looked around for the rest of the group that usually tagged along with him.

“Thought I’d surprise you.” He grinned at me.

“Lucky me.” I rolled my eyes and shouldered my way around him and into the crowd that filled the pub.

Niall laughed beside me, obviously not getting the hint that I didn’t want to be bothered by him. I had done a brilliant job of avoiding him after the mishap at his place. I had myself convinced that I had successfully evaded him for yet another day when he appeared at the bar. “There’s a party at mine tonight and I would be delighted if you agreed to join.”

I laughed and shook my head in disbelief at his choice of words “Was that your attempt at being charming?”

“Did it work?” he asked and flashed a dazzling smile in my direction and wiggling his eyebrows.

I shook my head, momentarily dazzled by his smile. “No.” I answered and began to convince myself that his smile had no effect on me. I wasn’t dazzled, I was just hungry and it was making me feel all out of sorts.

“So are you coming over or…”

“Probably.” I said honestly knowing that there would be loads of alcohol there and it had been quite a while since I had last let loose.

“Brilliant. See you there.” Niall said with a smile before he vanished into the crowd.

Not even two minutes later Connor and Zayn appeared by my side and before I knew it we were outside getting blinded by cameras and going deaf from all of the screaming. It felt like getting into Zayn’s car was mission impossible. I hated the way doing simple tasks turned into huge chores when I was in the company of the famous One Direction. I was silent while Connor and Zayn chatted on the drive to Niall’s. All I could think about is how frustrating it had to be for every member of the band to live their day to day lives. They created pandemonium wherever they went and it had to be exhausting.

When we got to Niall’s I was surprised when it was over flowing with people. In fact, there was barely anyone there compared to every other One Direction house party I had attended. I raised a brow but took my coat off and threw it into the pile of coats that had started by the door. “Where is everyone?” Connor voiced the very same thought I had.

Zayn shrugged “Guess it’s a small party.”

Small parties weren’t exactly my favorite kind of parties. There was more of a chance that people would take notice of me and less of a chance for me to blend in and avoid human contact. I stayed close behind Connor and Zayn as they made their way into Niall’s kitchen. I stayed silent next to Connor for about an hour while she and Zayn chatted with people, the only thing I did while they were talking was down a few drinks while occasionally introducing myself and dodging conversation.

In what felt like no time everyone around seemed to be too intoxicated to be bothered with anything. I stumbled away from Connor and Zayn with a new drink in hand. I finally ended up sitting in front of a huge window in what I remembered to be Niall’s bedroom. I hadn’t seen any sign of him all night and I was way too drunk even care if it was rude. All I wanted to do was be alone and look out over London and not be bothered by the drinking games or strangers talking away about shit that I couldn’t care less about.

I took a long drink from my cup, entranced by the twinkling Christmas lights that were scattered around. “There you are.” I turned at the sound of Niall’s voice and offered him a weak smile before I turned my attention back to the view out of his bedroom window. “What’re you doing in here? All the fun is out there.” Niall slurred as he took a seat beside me on the floor.

“Dunno.” I shrugged.

There was a few minutes of silence between us before Niall spoke again. “Are we just going to pretend that the other night didn’t happen?” he asked referring to the kiss that I was trying to delete from my memory.

“That was my plan.” I confessed, taking another long drink.

“We should go out.” Niall said, I raised an eyebrow at him and watched his cheeks flush a light shade of pink. “Like on a date.” He finished, quickly adverting his eyes out the window.

“I thought we decided to be friends.” I took a deep breath, trying to remain calm when all I wanted to do was walk away to avoid that topic. “Besides, I don’t do dates.”

“I like you.”

“Yeah.” I rolled my eyes because it was nothing he hadn’t told me before. “Why is that anyway?” I asked not interested in all at whatever his answer would be. “I’ve been nothing but nasty to you and yet you still claim to like me. I don’t get it.” I laughed bitterly and shook my head, not taking my eyes off the glittering lights.

“You’re interesting, ya’know…different and you’re really beautiful.” He mumbled, looking at the hardwood floor beneath us.

“You should date my friend Ruby.” I said ignoring his attempt his attempt at flattery. “I can see you dating Ruby.” I said honestly.

“I don’t want to date your friend.” Niall sighed, his calloused fingers tracing a pattern over my hand. “I wanna date you.”

“I already told you, I don’t date.” I growled and pulled my hand out of his reach.

“And why is that?” he asked, it was becoming clear by the tone of his voice he was getting irritated by my refusal to acknowledge his interest in me.

“Dating often leads to relationships.” I stated. “And a relationship is exactly what I don’t want.”

“So you plan on being alone forever.” Niall deadpanned. “That’s what you’re telling me?”

“Nailed it.” I said, smiling to myself and raising my glass in celebration before taking another long drink.

“Why?”

“Why?” I repeated. “Because love is façade, it’s not real. No matter how much someone says they love you, they’ll always love themselves more and in the end someone ends up getting hurt. It’s not worth it.” I stated. “It’s a waste of time and energy.”

“You want to know what I think?” Niall asked.

“Not really.” I laughed “but I’m sure you’re going to tell me anyway.”

“I think that one day you’re going to get tired of pretending to be a cold, heartless bitch. I think it’s all an act because you’re afraid that if you let someone in that you’re going to end getting hurt.” Niall told me honestly. “I can see right through your act. Not everyone wants to hurt you.” He said taking me by surprise before he stood up and made his way out of the room. Leaving me to try to wrap my head around the idea of Niall knowing what was going on inside my head.

“Fuck off.” I growled at him even though he was long gone. “You don’t know me.”