Draco Malfoy's Dirty Little Secret

Draco’s POV

I wasn’t sure I heard my dad right. Did he say that I was going to marry this girl that was standing right next to me? I hadn’t even said one word to her at that point. I was going to marry a girl that I hadn’t even talked to. That’s just peachy.

“Draco?” the girl’s voice entered my thoughts as I was pretty sure I was about to black out. “Are you okay?” she asked and I looked over at her. Sure, she was attractive with blonde hair and dark brown eyes, but she wasn’t Courtney.

I nodded stiffly. “I’m fine.”

“Are you sure? You’ve gone pale,” she pointed out.

I shrugged. “Doesn’t matter,” I said shortly.

“Pumpkin?” mom was the one to ask me this time. “Are you sure you’re okay? Astoria is right, you have gone pale. You’re not getting sick, are you?”

“I just need some air. Can I be excused?” I asked as everyone sat down to the food that the house elves were carrying in. “I just need to think. I’ll be right back. I promise.”

Mom nodded. I kissed her on the cheek in thanks and headed for the exit. It was damn cold out, but I didn’t care. Why hadn’t my parents told me that they were marrying me off instead of telling me at the same time they tell the whole world? It would’ve been a lot less heart shattering on my part. I mean, why can’t I marry the girl I want? Does the Dark Lord have to have control over that as well? Of course he does. He can’t have us ruining our blood statuses and breeding with the blood traitors and muggles. What a catastrophe that would be! I used to believe the same way, but Courtney would be considered a blood traitor now. How could I not love her? She’s just so perfect. She’s perfect for me and nothing will ever change that, especially some girl who went to Beautbeax. I think she was older than me as well. I just didn’t see a future with her, mainly because I the only think I knew about her was her name. How could I marry someone and not know them?

“Hey.”

I turned and saw Astoria walking towards me. Why did she follow me out there? Couldn’t I have been lucky and got a girl who didn’t want to marry me? I know I’m good looking, but I was just hoping for once in my life for a girl who wasn’t attracted to me at all. So far, it hasn’t happened, and apparently I wasn’t going to get so lucky.

“What are you doing out here?” I asked, not sounding as rude as I wanted to be.

“You’re not the only one that needed to think, Draco,” she smirked. “I don’t think I’m the only one whose parents didn’t enlighten them about the situation at hand, am I right?”

I nodded. “So, you’re in shock as well. Nice to know.”

“I also don’t want to go through with it,” she said, not looking at me, “As good looking as you are, I still don’t want to do it. I’m not in love with you, and I never will be. All I want is my Rolf.”

“Rolf?” I asked, starting to like her just a little.

She nodded. “Rolf is the love of my life. I met him when I traveled around Europe right after I graduated. We met in Paris. Afterward, he came with me on the rest of the trip. We just got back a few weeks ago. Mum and dad didn’t like him and threw him out at once. I threw a hissy fit and haven’t been out of my room in weeks.”

“So, how old are you if you don’t mind me asking?”

She then looked at me. “I’m nineteen, too old for you. Three years is a big age difference when the girl is the older one. You know what I mean?”

I nodded. I didn’t really understand, but I went with it. It was better than causing an argument to say the least. She seemed really nice, and lucky me, she didn’t want me! Man, I’d never thought I’d see the day when I would be cheering that a girl didn’t like me. I, Draco Malfoy, am cheering because a hot girl isn’t attracted to me. It was the best damn news that I had ever gotten.

“From the look on your face when we heard the news, you looked as though your whole world just stopped. You’re in love with someone, aren’t you? I must’ve been wearing the same look because my mum rolled her eyes in disgust. Imagine the people in an arranged marriage not wanting to marry the other. It’s scandalous, don’t you think?” She joked, her brown eyes shining just a little as she laughed.

I smiled half heartedly. “Yes, it’s scandalous alright, especially since my girl doesn’t even know that I’m a deatheater yet. I’ll just break her heart double time now, don’t you think?” I wasn’t joking, instead I wiped the smiles off both our faces in one go.

“Rolf knew that my family was a part of this,” she murmured. “He also knew that I was against all of it, so he wasn’t bothered by it, until he knew what kind of power they held. It was a very sad day indeed. You’ll definitely be breaking her heart twice. It’s not good that you’ve been keeping this secret from her, but in the end we all have our dirty little secrets, don’t we?”

I looked from her and down the hill at the Flint manor. “My dirty little secret could kill people though.”

“I didn’t say they couldn’t be deadly,” she shrugged. “Honesty is the best policy. I would tell her before its too late. You know that you could lose her either way. Might as well take the manly way out, eh?”

I shook my head. “It’s better that she doesn’t know. At least until I figure out a way to protect her, until then I’ll just keep my distance. It’s better than just completely leaving her, I guess.”

She sighed. “And what are you going to do to protect her? The only thing you could possibly do is fall out of love with her, but we both know that it’s just not possible. You can’t control who you fall in love with. If so, this world would be a hell of a lot easier.”

“I have found a way, or at least my mentor has found a way.”

She looked at me oddly. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about Occlumacy,” I said with a smirk.

She smiled. “Well, more power to you. It sure sounds easier than my plan, didn’t it? But I’m not branded, so I don’t have to worry about either of those. He can’t see into my mind, so I don’t have to fall out of love with Rolf. I guess I’m just the luckier one out of both of us.”

“You sure are,” I said, my eyes wondering back down to Flint Manor. “I’ll see you in a bit. Okay? I’m going to have a chat with the neighbor real fast. If anyone asks, I had to use the loo.”

“Just be back in five or else,” she sneered and walked back into the house.

I took a deep breath before knocking on the door, only to have Marcus be the one to open it. I hadn’t seen him in a while. He was looking good for not being around much, and I was about to tell him too before he punched me. Right in the mouth as well.

“What the bloody hell was that for?” I asked, my hand rushing to my face. “I haven’t done a damn thing you prick!” Well, it was the truth.

“Whatever you did to my sister wasn’t nothing, you asshole. Just stay away from her so you don’t hurt her anymore, you got it?” And with that said, he slammed the door shut.

What the bloody hell was his problem? I hadn’t done anything to his sister. Well, except for telling her that we couldn’t have a relationship and then jumping her bones. I was sending her mixed signals. I must’ve confused her quite a bit, but I still don’t understand why that would cause for me to get punched. It definitely wasn’t called for.

“Where have you been?” my mother asked me when I returned to the party.

I shrugged. “Around. Do you mind if I go to bed for the night? I’m awfully tired from all the excitement,” I knew it was a lame excuse, but I couldn’t come up with anything else off the top of my head.

She nodded. “Sleep well my angel,” she kissed me on the forehead before letting me retreat to my room, where I definitely needed to think things out.

The next day, I still wasn’t able to get Marcus punching me. What had Courtney said to him that got him all upset like that? I mean, I really hadn’t done anything that I would consider throwing punches over. Yes, I agree that I was being dick-ish towards her, but I just couldn’t find the words to tell her about… well, as Astoria put it, my dirty little secret. I had gone for a walk around the neighborhood that morning. Walking past places Courtney and I used to go all the time when we were little, such as the pond. It was great for swimming in the summer and even better for ice skating in the winter. When I arrived there, I was surprised to see that I wasn’t the only one there. Courtney was there, standing on the ice. My heart jumped in my chest, and I decided that it was my chance to find out what was going on.

“Courtney!” I yelled, scaring her, which caused her to fall flat on her back.

I rushed down to help her, and when I took one step on the ice, I fell as well. She started laughing, which caused me to laugh as well. It was nice to hear her laugh. It was nice to actually laugh after everything that had been going on. We eventually made it to the shore, where we sat down beside each other. I sighed and looked at her.

“What’s going on?” I asked her, which caused her to look at me oddly.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?” she countered and stood. “Look, Draco, I can’t do this right now. We’ll talk later when I’m in a better mood, okay?”

“You seem in a pretty good mood, considering you were just laughing,” I pointed out and stood as well. “We have a good time together, no matter what the situation is. That’s what people in love do, and if you can’t tell me what’s going on then how am I supposed to tell you?” I know I should’ve have pulled that on her, but I wanted to know what had been said. “Why did your brother punch me yesterday when I came to see you?”

“You were at my house last night?”

I rolled my eyes. “I’m sure he didn’t tell you. He just slammed the door right in my face after having practically broken my jaw,” I said, pointing to it. I was laying it on a bit thick for dramatic effect, and she knew it too.

She smirked and walked closer. Her hand touched my jaw before becoming flat against it. “Yes, he really did break it didn’t he?” Her blue eyes shined like they had that day in Hogsmeade. “What were you doing at my house anyway?”

I shrugged. “I just wanted to see you. Is that a crime?”

“Well, if I was your girlfriend, no, but as you made pretty clear the day before last that we can’t be together until you’re ready, it can be considered a crime for now,” her hand then fell from my cheek. “I’ll see you later, Draco,” she started to turn, but I caught her by the arm.

We looked into each other’s eyes for a moment or two before I just let her go. I had the urge right then and there to tell her everything that was going on with my life, but I had decided not to. We would talk later when it was safer. It was a mistake to even talk to her that day. It was a mistake to fall in love with her at such a bad time in my life.