Love Isn't Always Fair...

~Andy'sPOV~

I wake up before Ashley. Everything last night was a blur. I cannot remember what happened. I lift myself up, but I scream in pain because of my arms. Tears roll down my cheeks. Ashley starts to wake up. Shit, I've woke him up now...

"Baby, baby. What's wrong" Ashley sits up and he wraps his arms around me.

"I.. my arms. They hurt... what happened. Why am I hurting?"

"You don't remember what happened?"

"No. Ashley, what happened? I'm so scared" I sobbed into his shoulder.

"Last night, you cut yourself. Your arms and your thighs and your tummy, hips and sides are covered in cuts" Last night came flooding back. The dream, the cutting.. seeing Ashley's face. I hurt Ashley, I've hurt him. I don't deserve to live.

I must have cried harder, because Ashley pulled me close to his chest. What have I done?! I look at my arms, covered in bandages. I frantically start clawing at them, desperate to get them off. Ashley stops me.

"No baby, don't do that"

"Take them off! Please!!"

"Sshh baby"

"Ashley, I'm so scared"

"Baby, everything is going to be okay"

"No Ashley! It won't!!" I leap up out of his arms!

"Baby..."

"Don't fucking say that everything will be okay because it's not gonna be okay!! Look at me! I'm a mess, I'm broken. My family hates me, EVERYONE hates me! So no Ashley, everything is not gonna be okay!!"

I look at Ashley's face. A look of hurt flashed in his eyes.

"Oh my gosh. I'm sorry Ashley, I didn't mean to yell." I fall to my knees and I cry. Ashley kneels in front of me and he wraps his arms around me. He pulls me into his chest and I cry.

"It's okay baby. You're upset. But I will fix you. I don't care how long it takes, I will fix you. You will get better. I promise you. I'll be right here by your side"

"Promise?" I muffle in his chest.

"I promise baby. I love you and it hurts me to see you like this"

"I'm sorry"

"You have no reason to be sorry baby. You're hurt, you're broken and I want to fix you again" he looks in my eyes. "Your eyes, they are dead. You're dead. There is not spark in you. I want to see that spark in your beautiful blue eyes"

"That's not true"

"It is baby. Someone once told me that you can tell a lot by a person, just by looking in there eyes" I blush and smile as that was what I said to him.

"I love you"

"I love you too"

"Kiss me!" Ashley smiles and crashes his lips against mine. Fireworks were going off in my stomach. Ashley parts my lips and teeth with his tongue and he slides his tongue in my mouth. Our tongues dance about. We both fight for dominance, but none of us won. We broke apart for some air and I cuddle into his chest.

"I love you"

"I love you too. Let's get something to eat"

"What about school?"

"Andy. It's 11 o' clock. We're late, plus with the state that you're in, I don't think it's best if you went in today"

"True" he takes my hand and lifts me up. My belly growls. I haven't eaten for two days straight!

"Someone is hungry" I giggle weakly and I chew on my lip ring.

Ashley takes me to the kitchen and I sit down at the table. I watch as Ashley dashes this way and that as he makes pancakes. I really didn't want to eat.

After a few minutes, Ashley sets a plate of pancakes in front of me. I look down at it and I chew my lip ring. Ashley was enjoying his. I pick at mine with my fork.

"Baby, you should eat something"

"I'm not hungry"

"But.."

"I said, I'm not hungry!"

"Oh... okay then" I push my plate away and I stand up.

"Where are you going?"

"Upstairs.."

"Okay."

I sigh as I make my way to the bathroom. I'm becoming a monster...

I open the bathroom door, dreading the worst. I freeze. It looks like a scene from C.S.I. My blood was just there, chilling on the bathroom floor. I look at some circles. That must have been when Ashley was kneeling to fix me up.

I suddenly felt very sick. I gage and I rush to the toilet, just in time to throw up. There was nothing in my stomach, so I only threw up bile and acid. It burned my throat. I heard Ashley coming up.

"Baby?" He knocks on the door. I go to say something, but as soon as I opened my mouth, I threw up again. Ashley opens the door and he leans over me, rubbing circles on my back, soothing me.

After I had done, I wiped my mouth. I look at Ashley and I burst into tears. Ashley hugs me close.

"What happened baby?"

"I came.. I came in here and I saw the blood. I.... i ... the memories from last night came flooding back"

"Shhhh baby. It's going to be okay. Now, why don't you get some clothes on whilst I clean this up. I don't want my mom and dad coming back home and look at this. They might think that I had killed someone" I giggle

"I like your giggle. It's adorable." I blush and he kisses my cheek. I make my way to the bedroom and I unzip my bag. I pull out my fav BOTDF top and my black skinnies. I change into them and I do my eyeliner. I cannot be bothered doing the rest of my make up.

I straighten and tease my hair. I look at myself in the mirror. Staring back at me was a fat boy. A fat, broken boy who deserves everything that people throw at him. No wonder my family hates me, no wonder no one loves me. I'm broken, fat and worthless. I look at my bandages. I hate myself. I hate myself so much. I wish Ashley didn't find me.

I wish I was dead...

I take a shaky breath in and I make my way to the bathroom. Ashley was on his hands and knees, surrounded by a bloody towel. He was busy wiping up my blood. I swallow. I don't deserve him. Ever since I've got here,
I've just been causing him trouble. I should leave. It's for the best.

I go to the bedroom and I pack my things. I put on my high tops and I put my bag over my shoulder. I go downstairs as I listen to Ashley singing to himself.

I reach the door and I spot a little notepad and pen. I should write him a note.

"To Ashley. I should have never come to you rhouse. I should have never been involved in your life. I'm just gonna cause you more trouble, trouble that you don't need. I'm sorry. I'm a wreak and I don't deserve you. I love you Ashley, forever, but you don't need me. I'll just ruin your life. I love you and I'm sorry. Andy. xx"

I put the pen down and I open the door. I walk out and I close the door behind me. I have no idea where I am going to go...

My legs take me to the middle of no where. I couldn't get Ashley out of my head. I can imagine the devastation on face. The look of hurt as he reads the note. I wipe away tears as I bump into someone.

"Oh shit, sor..." I look up to find that I had bumped into Harry.

Oopps.

"You! I'm glad I bumped into you. You're so gonna pay for what you've done to me and mom"

"What are you talking about? What about me?"

"It's always about you Andy!"

"No Harry. It's always about mom and it's always about you. Has anyone thought about me for a change?!"

"Not really! But what you have done to mom, she is heartbroken. She cannot believe that you have paid her like this after everything she has done for you"

"She has done nothing for me Harry!"

"Yes she has. She feed you, clothed you"

"She didn't love me Harry. All I wanted and all I asked for was love!"

"No one will ever love you Andy. Who would love a faggot. Who would love a fucking fat emo faggot"

"Thanks for that dick" Harry pushes me against the wall.

"You'll regret you ever said that" he punches me in the stomach.

"You'll also gonna repay for breaking my jaw and you're also gonna repay mom for hurting her you faggot!" He throws me to the ground as my bag falls of my shoulders. He kicks me over and over again in the stomach. I wince in pain as his foots collides in my stomach.

He then punches my face over and over again. He then kicks my ribs and i heard an agonizing crack. I cringe at the sound. Yep, there goes my ribs.

He continues to kick and punch me until I couldn't feel anything. All I could think about was Ashley...

I continue to think about Ashley and Harry stands over me.

"I hate you Andy. No one will love you, you might as well go sit in a corner and slit your wrist. I hope you die!"

He spits by my feet as he walks off. I struggle to get my phone out of my pocket as I was in so much pain, not only from my ribs and being beaten, but from my arms. My eyelids started to feel heavy.

No Andy, stay awake! I scroll threw my contacts and I find Ashley's number.

My eyelids were refusing to stay open. As I went to press the call button;

Darkness took over me...