Love Isn't Always Fair...

~Andy'sPOV~

"Andy. Andy, baby" I slowly peel my eyes open. I looked up to see that Ashley was hovering over me.

"Ugh! What!"

"It's time to get up"

"No, it's not!" I put the covers over my head.

"Andy!" Ashley pulls them back and I curl up in a ball.

"Ashley , fuck off and leave me alone!" I pull the covers over my head again as I say it harsh, a little to harsh.

"Andy what's wrong?" I felt Ashley sitting at the end of the bed.

"Nothing!"

"But Andy-"

"I said, nothing, now fuck off!" I cut him off.

"Oh, okay.." I felt Ashley getting up of the bed and sighing, sadly.

I don't mean to hurt him, honestly. It's just sometimes, he just don't know when to leave me alone and it fucking pisses me off!

My eyelids started to get heavy. I tried to keep them open, but failed.

Sleep took over me.

~

I felt something cold on my back. I look up and I see that I was chained to a table, naked.

No! Fuck! No!

I heard a door opening. I look up and i see Harry and my mom with evil smirks on their faces.

"Hello baby" my mom comes up to me and she grabs my dick harshly and she rubs it. Harry comes up to my face and kisses me roughly. Harry pulls away and they both laugh!

~

I wake up in a sweaty mess. I was panting, shaking, my palms were sweaty. I tried to calm down my breathing, but I couldn't.

I heard Ashley rushing up the stairs. He comes rushing threw the door.

"Andy! Are you okay? I heard you screaming" I screamed?

"I...I had a bad dream" Ashley comes and sits next to me. He goes to wrap his arms around me for a hug, but I move away, scared.

"Don't... touch.. me!'

"What? Why?" A look of confusion flashed in his eyes. Tears started to roll down my cheeks.

"Please, don't touch me" I back away from him, frightened as ever!

"Andy, what has gotten into you." Ashley looked at me worried.

"Please, just stay away from me. Please don't touch me!"

"Andy. Please, tell me what's wrong with you. Please?" He moves closer to me and i dash out of bed to the bathroom.

I lock the door and I sit on the floor with my back to it. I pull my knees up to my chin and I wrap my arms around my legs, so I was in a ball.

I wish I could tell Ashley. It's killing me inside. Having to pretend everything is okay, when it's not. I need help, like now. I want to tell him, so badly. The longer I keep it in, the more upset and broken I feel. I wish I could tell him, I really do, but I can't, because Harry will kill him.

I've never been this scared in my life. Yeah, I was scared when my mom first hit me, but this, this is different. I feel like, no one can help me. Not even Ashley.

I'm that scared, that I won't let Ashley touch me. I'm scared that he'll do something horrible to me. I know that he won't, but I cannot help but feel like he will. I know he loves me and I know that he won't do anything to hurt me, but because of Harry, I feel broken, vulnerable.

I just want to curl up in a ball, I just want the floor to swallow me whole, so I don't have to live on this planet. I cannot cope no more. I want to hug Ashley, I want to kiss him, to hold his hand,

But I can't...

I want Ashley so badly...

I want to tell him so badly...

I want everything to be okay. For everything to be back to normal. I want to feel like myself again. I can't because I still feel like I have Harry on me! I could still feel his hands on me, his lips.

The skin on my thighs started to burn. I suddenly got fidgety. I couldn't bare it!

I quickly get up and I look for the razor. Where. The. Fuck. Is. It!

I suddenly remember that I left it in the shower from yesterday. How the hell did Ashley not see it?

I pick it up and I sit on the shower floor. I pull my pants down to my knees and I place the cold razor on the skin of my thighs.

I cut deeply, blood gushing out of each cut I made. I calve in the words;

Faggot.

Worthless.

Emo.

Fat.

Cunt.

Whore.

I cut until I couldn't feel. After I had done, I place the razor beside me and I watch the blood sliding down the side of my legs.

Tears streaming down my cheeks. I couldn't control the tears. I couldn't control myself. I wish I could, but I cannot.

The urge to die was strong, stronger than ever. I've never wanted something so badly, well, apart from Ashley. I want to die so badly.

I should have died in hospital. CC shouldn't have found me. I should have died on the bathroom floor in hospital. I have nothing left to live for.

I'd be better of dead. Ashley deserves better than me. Me being out of his life, would make it so much easier for him.

I sigh as I clean myself up. I pull my pants back up and I unlock the door.

I walk back to the bedroom and I see that Ashley had his back to me. He was crying...

"Ashley?" Ashley turns around and he wipes his eyes.

"Andy" I turn my head to the side and Ashley looks at my neck. I look at him and I see that his eyes have widen. Anger had taken over his sadness...

"What. Is. That?" Ashley comes up to me and points to my love bites. My heart was pounding, my palms got sweaty.

"I...It's not what it looks like!"

"Oh, is it not!"

"Ashley.. please!"

"Save it Andy! What has gotten into you! You've changed!"

"I..."

"You've become short tempered all of a sudden, you won't let me touch you, you've become distant from me! You've changed and I don't like it! I want the OLD Andy! I HATE this new Andy!"

"Ashley..."

"You're not the Andy I fell in love with.." I look at him, shocked and upset. My eyes were filling up with hot tears. Ashley looks to the floor.

"Ashley, please.."

He holds his hand up, cutting me off.

He then walks past me to go downstairs. He was trying to keep his tears in.

He was trying to be strong for me...

His words, struck my heart like a dagger. This is killing me. I go and sit down on the edge of the bed as tears rolled down my cheeks.

"I wish I could tell you"

"If only you knew..."