Status: On hiatus.
Tiger Eyes
Fire
"She doesn't understand you," Mike told him the next night as they sat together in their usual table at that strategic spot of the Mahogany which allowed them to watch the entirety of the bar room with ease. Billie took advantage of this position now, staring away into the din of the club with sad, expressive eyes. It was so unlike his home. It was so warm, so beautiful, like something from a dream. Could he ever really leave it? Could he make himself wake up?
"I know, man! She just... she doesn't get it, y'know?"
"I know."
Billie looked back to his companion now. "And she still thinks I'm supposed to just pay attention to her, forget about the rest. Maybe the music is a phase though... like, I will after I get used to working here. Will pay attention more, I mean."
"A phase that has lasted all nineteen years of your life," Mike pointed out. Nineteen. Only four years younger than him and engaged to someone he wasn't happy with. What a waste of life. No time to experience happiness while he was young, only one unfulfilling person forever. How could Billie stand that? Obviously, he couldn't, but maybe that was why Mike liked him. He knew that Billie wasn't meant for unconditional love. Billie had a mind of his own. He was different.
"But I love her. At least, I think..."
"No, you don't."
Billie was taken aback. How could this man tell him he didn't love his fiancé? How dare he say that when he'd only known Billie for a few weeks? But Mike seemed so sure, so matter-of-fact, Billie couldn't help but doubt his own affections from the very moment that blunt statement escaped the man's mouth. "Wh... what?"
Mike's answer was simple. It involved no bombastic words or long-winded explanations. It almost seemed an explanation in itself, this little action, though Billie was unable to grasp the meaning of it as it happened. He hardly felt within his own body, hardly felt like himself anymore. And suddenly, he was not Billie Joe Armstrong, fiancé of Adrienne Nesser. In that moment, he was only a man, kissing another amazing man who he would in the previous instant have named as Michael Pritchard. This was no spark, Billie realized without the words to think it. This was a flame stronger than the one that had burned with Adrienne for a long time. It was bright fireworks and heat and danger, and it was perfect.
"You don't love her," Mike repeated when they'd pulled apart. Billie still felt outside himself as he stared, speechless, at the extraordinary man in front of him. What had just happened?
The ends of Mike's thin lips twitched ever so slightly in a shadow of a smile. Billie had just kissed those lips. How long, he didn't know, but it was long enough to leave him breathless and aching for another taste. Just one more kiss, just one more touch, just a word from those lips would be enough.
But Mike didn't kiss him again or touch his hand or speak even a single word. He only stood from his seat at their booth and began walking away, towards the hallway leading to the extra rooms at the back of the bar. The hall was guarded by a stoic bouncer who only looked to the man left in the booth and nodded when Mike's quiet words came to his ear. Mike chose a room and looked back to Billie before sending him a wink and closing the door behind him.
Billie was paralyzed. His mind seemed to have stopped working as he attempted in his panic to comprehend what had occurred. Mike had kissed him. He'd felt Mike's lips on his, Mike's breath in his mouth, Mike's hand resting on his cheek. For some reason, that was wrong. He shouldn't have let it happen. He shouldn't go with him now. But then, something in Mike's eyes wouldn't let him refuse. They said, "Do it now. You may never get another chance."
As if in a trance, Billie stood from the booth. His feet ignored the fast pace of his beating heart and slowly glid over the floor to the door behind which Mike waited, his brain not registering the bouncer's attentive glance as Billie walked by. This was it. He and Mike would... he couldn't even think the words past that. Me and Mike. Billie and Mike. Mike and Billie. Us.
After a moment of hesitation, he allowed his hand to turn the cold doorknob. He glanced once more to the world beyond the end of the hall, the savage world of the Mahogany. Where was he going now? Just another part of it, he supposed, a more secret part of the jungle where most couldn't reach. The tiger's den.
Billie slipped in and immediately found his back against the wooden door behind him and his gasp muffled by another mouth on his. Mike's full body was against him, holding him firmly to the door as Billie accepted his firey kisses. The smaller man could only melt into the taller one's arms as this took place, allowing himself to be taken over by hot kisses and the warm, living body against him. It was something so different from any other contact with Mike that he couldn't refuse it.
But what about Adrienne?
"Mike, stop," he managed to say as their lips parted for just a moment. As if by switch, the man halted a hair's width from Billie's lips. Oh, it was too far, Billie wanted him now. But no. No, he couldn't. "I... I have a girlfriend."
Finally, Billie dared to look up into his companion's eyes and was shocked to find that they had become softer. It was as if the pale gemstones which shaped his eyes had melted into two shining pools of liquid blue crystal in front of him, like the slightest word from Billie could send out ripples through his eyes, through his secret soul.
"You have a fiancé," he reminded, not bothering to step away from the smaller man. Billie could feel Mike's lips moving close to his, Mike's hot breath in his mouth. He wanted to know him, not just the cold statue of a man the rest of the world knew. He wanted to know the warmth, the humanity, the real person that was Mike Pritchard. The one behind the veil of ice.
He looked down again, down to his left hand which rested on the taller man's now slightly bared chest, the little band gleaming in the light of the room. Mike didn't care about that ring, he realized as he watched the hand's steady rise and fall. Mike didn't care that he was engaged or that Adrienne was probably waiting for him at home or that he thought he was in love.
And Billie had a choice.
Billie glanced back up into those crystal blue pools again as his hand traveled down to touch the cold doorknob. There was no turning back once he'd done it. Once he'd allowed himself to be swept away by this mysterious man named Michael Pritchard. Once he'd succumbed to Mike's warmth and blunt charm and easy understanding. He loved his fiancé so much... but still, the only sound in the room was the click of a lock.
"I know, man! She just... she doesn't get it, y'know?"
"I know."
Billie looked back to his companion now. "And she still thinks I'm supposed to just pay attention to her, forget about the rest. Maybe the music is a phase though... like, I will after I get used to working here. Will pay attention more, I mean."
"A phase that has lasted all nineteen years of your life," Mike pointed out. Nineteen. Only four years younger than him and engaged to someone he wasn't happy with. What a waste of life. No time to experience happiness while he was young, only one unfulfilling person forever. How could Billie stand that? Obviously, he couldn't, but maybe that was why Mike liked him. He knew that Billie wasn't meant for unconditional love. Billie had a mind of his own. He was different.
"But I love her. At least, I think..."
"No, you don't."
Billie was taken aback. How could this man tell him he didn't love his fiancé? How dare he say that when he'd only known Billie for a few weeks? But Mike seemed so sure, so matter-of-fact, Billie couldn't help but doubt his own affections from the very moment that blunt statement escaped the man's mouth. "Wh... what?"
Mike's answer was simple. It involved no bombastic words or long-winded explanations. It almost seemed an explanation in itself, this little action, though Billie was unable to grasp the meaning of it as it happened. He hardly felt within his own body, hardly felt like himself anymore. And suddenly, he was not Billie Joe Armstrong, fiancé of Adrienne Nesser. In that moment, he was only a man, kissing another amazing man who he would in the previous instant have named as Michael Pritchard. This was no spark, Billie realized without the words to think it. This was a flame stronger than the one that had burned with Adrienne for a long time. It was bright fireworks and heat and danger, and it was perfect.
"You don't love her," Mike repeated when they'd pulled apart. Billie still felt outside himself as he stared, speechless, at the extraordinary man in front of him. What had just happened?
The ends of Mike's thin lips twitched ever so slightly in a shadow of a smile. Billie had just kissed those lips. How long, he didn't know, but it was long enough to leave him breathless and aching for another taste. Just one more kiss, just one more touch, just a word from those lips would be enough.
But Mike didn't kiss him again or touch his hand or speak even a single word. He only stood from his seat at their booth and began walking away, towards the hallway leading to the extra rooms at the back of the bar. The hall was guarded by a stoic bouncer who only looked to the man left in the booth and nodded when Mike's quiet words came to his ear. Mike chose a room and looked back to Billie before sending him a wink and closing the door behind him.
Billie was paralyzed. His mind seemed to have stopped working as he attempted in his panic to comprehend what had occurred. Mike had kissed him. He'd felt Mike's lips on his, Mike's breath in his mouth, Mike's hand resting on his cheek. For some reason, that was wrong. He shouldn't have let it happen. He shouldn't go with him now. But then, something in Mike's eyes wouldn't let him refuse. They said, "Do it now. You may never get another chance."
As if in a trance, Billie stood from the booth. His feet ignored the fast pace of his beating heart and slowly glid over the floor to the door behind which Mike waited, his brain not registering the bouncer's attentive glance as Billie walked by. This was it. He and Mike would... he couldn't even think the words past that. Me and Mike. Billie and Mike. Mike and Billie. Us.
After a moment of hesitation, he allowed his hand to turn the cold doorknob. He glanced once more to the world beyond the end of the hall, the savage world of the Mahogany. Where was he going now? Just another part of it, he supposed, a more secret part of the jungle where most couldn't reach. The tiger's den.
Billie slipped in and immediately found his back against the wooden door behind him and his gasp muffled by another mouth on his. Mike's full body was against him, holding him firmly to the door as Billie accepted his firey kisses. The smaller man could only melt into the taller one's arms as this took place, allowing himself to be taken over by hot kisses and the warm, living body against him. It was something so different from any other contact with Mike that he couldn't refuse it.
But what about Adrienne?
"Mike, stop," he managed to say as their lips parted for just a moment. As if by switch, the man halted a hair's width from Billie's lips. Oh, it was too far, Billie wanted him now. But no. No, he couldn't. "I... I have a girlfriend."
Finally, Billie dared to look up into his companion's eyes and was shocked to find that they had become softer. It was as if the pale gemstones which shaped his eyes had melted into two shining pools of liquid blue crystal in front of him, like the slightest word from Billie could send out ripples through his eyes, through his secret soul.
"You have a fiancé," he reminded, not bothering to step away from the smaller man. Billie could feel Mike's lips moving close to his, Mike's hot breath in his mouth. He wanted to know him, not just the cold statue of a man the rest of the world knew. He wanted to know the warmth, the humanity, the real person that was Mike Pritchard. The one behind the veil of ice.
He looked down again, down to his left hand which rested on the taller man's now slightly bared chest, the little band gleaming in the light of the room. Mike didn't care about that ring, he realized as he watched the hand's steady rise and fall. Mike didn't care that he was engaged or that Adrienne was probably waiting for him at home or that he thought he was in love.
And Billie had a choice.
Billie glanced back up into those crystal blue pools again as his hand traveled down to touch the cold doorknob. There was no turning back once he'd done it. Once he'd allowed himself to be swept away by this mysterious man named Michael Pritchard. Once he'd succumbed to Mike's warmth and blunt charm and easy understanding. He loved his fiancé so much... but still, the only sound in the room was the click of a lock.