Symphonies of the Damned

[Time Lapse; Few Weeks Later]

“You’re such a fucking faggot.”
“What’s the point of forming a band if you know you’re going to fail?”
“Ballsack!”
Their shouts were sounding over the screams of the fans; I couldn’t hear anything else. I couldn’t see anything but their middle fingers.
Stop, fucking stop!
I wanted to live out my dream, not be torn down by a crowd of rude, loathing haters!
“Enough!” I screamed out.
Behind me, Jake and Jinxx strummed out their final chord before stopping their playing altogether.
I could feel their looks of confusion as I watched over the crowd.
“I don’t fucking understand,” I started. “I did everything I could to start a band that meant something to me! That meant something to other people who were like me! With different thoughts and different feelings! It’s people like that fucking asshole that ruin these sort of things for me, for us! Honestly, he’s probably just jealous. They’re probably the fuckers who are in love with me.” I smirked.
“I’m not say, I’m sorry you little fucker, but I’m not gay! Call me, and I’ll hook you up with someone else.” I winked.
The cheering helped me gain back a little more confidence.
“This next song is called The Legacy.” I announced, signaling Jake from behind me.

“You guys were fucking awesome!” I screamed, grinning. “We’ve been Black Veil Brides, and thanks for having us! We’re going to change it up a bit; let’s fucking hear it for I See Stars!”
We filed offstage, allowing room for the roadies to disband our set.
“You doing okay Andy?” Jake asked, handing off his guitar to his tech and pulling the in-ear piece out.
“Yeah.” I smiled, pulling mine out as well.
“I’ll always be jealous of the insane confidence you have Andy.” Ashley complimented with a sad smile.
“There’s nothing to it.” I lied, putting a hand on his shoulder. You just had to fake it until you felt it.
He nodded, staring past me in an almost empty manner.
Ugh.
He’d been distant ever since he basically told me off a couple weeks ago. We were ending our European dates tomorrow, and then we’d go back home.
After two weeks off, we’d start the American leg of the Symphonies of the Damned Tour.
“Ashley…” I tried, giving his shoulder a squeeze.
I wasn’t oblivious about the sudden current of emotion that flooded through me when our eyes locked gazes.
After a couple weeks of being ignored, I was beginning to see exactly what I had been missing.
What I had been abusing and taking advantage of.
There was something more to Ashley Purdy than just a great body and good sex. There was a personality and depth to him.
Lately, I’ve wanted to explore the euphoria, and find out what it meant.
He smiled lightly.
“There’s just something about you.” I whispered, unable to form the right words. Everyone else had headed back to the dressing room, intent on showering away the night’s sweat and war paint.
At least it wasn’t as bad as tours before this one.
We had stopped wearing as much black paint; settling on the bare minimum.
“What do you mean?” Ashley queried, trying to compress that hopeful glint in his eyes.
“You keep catching my attention, Purdy.” I breathed. “I want you, and it’s not only in that sexual way anymore. I want something more…”
Giving him another half-smile, I walked off towards the others in the dressing room.
There was a faint smile on his lips.
There was a light in his eyes, a glint that provided a view inside of his mind.
I had given him hope.
This wasn’t another attempt to get in his pants.
I needed him, needed him to keep me high, safe, wanted, needed, and most importantly…loved.
There was just something about him.
There was one more show left tomorrow, and then there were two weeks before the next round of shows.
I’ll be damned if something doesn’t happen between us by then.