You Are Exactly My Brand of Heroin

The desire to see her grew more intense by each passing moment. It seemed as though I was more nervous than Matt. Fortunately, she wasn't here to see my anxiety, though I'd just tried my best to cure hers. As I stared at the very familiar small box in my hand, I was reminded of just how important this day was for not only my best friend but for myself, as well. I was about take the same step he had with what I hoped to be the same result. The sound of soft footsteps brought me out of my thoughts, and I turned to find Matt standing behind me. He sighed as he glanced down at the treasure in my hand.

Placing his hands in his pockets, he smiled and said, "I hope you plan to use that well."

I nodded, saying, "Believe me, I do."

"I'm glad you're doing this, Brian. I know it seems like I don't approve of you being with my sister, but I really do. If I had to see her with anyone, I'd want it to be you, because I know you'll care for her. She's at her best when she's with you, and I know she'll be even better after today."

I glanced down at the box once more before placing it in my pocket. "Thanks, Matt, and I wish you and Val nothing more than complete happiness."

He chuckled and added, "Save it for the reception, man."

"I will."

Moments later, several knocks came to the front door. Matt and I exchanged quizzical glances before he reached for the handle. Behind the oak door were his parents. They smiled brightly at him as they enveloped him in a tight hug. Watching them congratulate him made my heart shatter, and I sighed. I'd forgotten all about his parents. I knew their presence would make Abby feel even more apprehensive, but I hoped that I could distract her just long enough to fulfill my duty. As I glanced up from the floor I'd been staring at, I was met with an outstretched hand that belonged to Matt's father.

He smiled at me, saying, "It's nice to see you, Brian." Anger coursed through my veins like a raging fire. Obviously, Matt's parents knew nothing about mine and Abby's relationship, and even though Abby had always been my best friend, they'd still thought very highly of me. They thought very highly of all of us. We were their pride and joy's best friends, after all, but as I took Mr. Sanders' hand in my own, I resisted the urge to murder him in his son's kitchen. I hadn't made contact with this man in nearly ten years, and seeing him now only intensified the resentment I had for him. Because of my love for Abby, I always opted to avoid confrontations with Matt's parents, but I knew there was nowhere to hide now.

"It's nice to see you, too, Mr. Sanders." He'd never been the generous father who insisted you call him by his first name, because he always demanded respect, as did his wife. They always kept introductions prim and proper, ensuring that you knew they were Mr. and Mrs. Sanders. As a matter-of-fact, I don't even know their first names, and I'm not so sure that their son does either.

Mr. Sanders adjusted his jacket as his wife attached herself to his arm once again as though she were an ornament. I simply nodded in a greeting, seeing as her husband would become infuriated if his conversation was interrupted, and she smiled back in response. She'd always been a trophy wife, if you will. She desired a life filled with riches and the perfect family. She'd always wanted a husband that treated her like royalty. She'd always wanted to be the only princess under her roof. Mr. Sanders assured his wife that he'd give her the moon if he could, so they set Abby aside to avoid ruining their lives and to keep one woman in their household. I clenched my fists and flexed my jaw as Mr. Sanders added, "I see you're doing quite well for yourself, working alongside my son."

Plastering the fakest smile I was able to muster in the moment, I nodded and replied, "Yes, I am, sir." Matt, nervously, glanced at me with a reassuring smile. He sensed my hostility, but he knew I could control it.

"Have you found yourself a fine, young woman to marry yet, son?" Mrs. Sanders asked.

With slightly gritted teeth, I answered, "I have."

"Who's the lucky lady?"

I chuckled, replying, "I assure you that you'll meet her at the ceremony."

"I look forward to making her acquaintance," Mrs. Sanders added. Trust me. You already have. All I could do was smile and nod again as they walked toward the dining room where the others were.

Matt exhaled sharply from where he stood next to me and said, "I am so sorry about that, Brian. I can't believe I didn't warn you about them. It must've slipped my mind."

I shook my head and replied, "It's fine, bro. They're your parents. They have just as much of a right to be here as I do."

"I just really hope they don't ruin your plans."

I scoffed, saying, "Stop being so selfless, Matt. Today is supposed to be the best day of your life. Focus on yourself and the woman that's meeting you at the altar."

"It's nice to hear someone say that."

I shrugged and said with a smile, "That's what best friends are for." As Matt opened his mouth to speak, my cell phone began playing Theory of a Deadman's Bad Girlfriend. I reached inside my jacket to find that I had a text message from Abby.

I'm outside. I need you.

I wasn't exactly positive what the message truly meant, but I wasn't going to leave her standing outside without me. As I began explaining the situation, Matt held his hand up, gesturing toward the door. I simply smiled as I placed my phone inside my jacket once again and left the house to find Abby standing on the front lawn alone, her arms crossed protectively over her chest. She was leaning against Leana's white Jeep Wrangler Unlimited in the most astounding dress I'd ever seen in my entire life. I stopped short a few feet of her to absorb her appearance, but she didn't seem to notice my moment of awe. As I slowly began moving again, she instantly ran into my arms, burying her flawless face in my chest. I sighed as I ran my fingers through her gorgeous brown curls.

She closed her eyes for a brief moment and said, "Michelle met us here." I knew she'd still be upset, regardless of what I said to her, but I was madly in love with her. I couldn't be angry at her for fearing another woman that I once loved.

"I promise everything's going to be just fine, baby. I won't let her ruin this day for either of us."

She smiled up at me as I gently kissed her lips. "His parents are here, too, aren't they?" I nodded, and she cursed under her breath.

"Remember where you are and what's happening today, Abby."

She smiled again, replying, "We're walking down the aisle together."

I nodded. "Yes, we are, and I couldn't be happier about it." I truly couldn't.

"I couldn't, either, and you look very handsome, by the way," she added as she kissed my lips once again. I couldn't resist the urge to keep our lips connected as I placed my hand on the back of her neck.

"You look just as beautiful, babe, but I'm curious about what's underneath that dress of yours."

She laughed and replied, "You only wish you knew."

"I'm sure I will. I'll catch you alone later, and we'll do whatever you want, however you please."

She smiled deviously. "I wouldn't threaten something so dangerous, Haner. You could possibly wake up in the morning without any feeling below the waist."

Moving my lips to her neck, I huskily replied, "I don't mind as long as it's for a good cause."

She moaned as I gently sucked on her skin, biting every tender spot that I knew made her weak in the knees. "If we weren't going to my brother's wedding, I swear to God I'd rip your clothes off and fuck you right now."

"I'd gladly let you do so, but I'm sure we're needed elsewhere," I said as I placed a few kisses on her lips.

She groaned, playfully slapping my chest as she asked, "Why'd you stop?"

I laughed and replied, "Didn't you hear what I said? We have business to attend to, and if I hadn't stopped, you never would've wanted to leave."

She stared at me for a moment, her arms crossed over her chest in mock anger. "Tonight, your bed, my way. Got it?"

"Got it."

The ceremony had only just begun, and we, being the wedding court, were waiting inside a separate tent for our cue to walk down the aisle. Abby absent-mindedly traced the 'Marlboro' tattoo on my knuckles as I surveyed the room. Taylor was adjusting Zach's tie, Johnny was tying his shoes while Lacey applied more lip gloss to her lips, Leana was spraying an enormous amount of hair spray in Jimmy's hair, Matt was reviewing his vows, and Michelle was sitting by herself, her arms angrily crossed over her chest as she glanced in every direction while her sister was in yet another tent with their father. The others chatted casually as they put the final touches on their ensembles. Though I could still sense Abby's anxiety, she seemed to be much more calm, especially after our previous conversation.

A familiar face appeared behind the white drapes, bringing a smile to my lips. For those of us who knew him, Chris Dibenedetto was an great friend. He was Val and Michelle's older brother, and he'd always been a member of our extended family. When Matt told him that he was proposing to his sister, he was overjoyed. For many years, he said that Val would marry Matt, and since that day has arrived, he's more than willing to be a part of it.

Chris cheerfully greeted Matt, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder as he asked, "How does it feel to be my future brother-in-law?"

Matt smiled and replied, "It feels pretty good."

"I knew it would. Everyone's waiting. Are you ready?"

He shrugged, saying, "I'm as ready as I'll ever be."

"You can do this, Matt. I have faith in you," Abby said. She smiled at him from her position next to me.

He smiled in returned and answered, "Thanks, Abbs."

Chris stared at her for a moment, exchanging glances between myself and Abby. "It's been a while, Abigail," he said brightly as Abby stood, approaching him within feet.

"Yes, it has, Christopher. How have you been?" she asked with a generous smile.

He shrugged and replied, "I've been absolutely wonderful, but it looks like you're doing better than I am." She followed his gaze that had landed on me, blushing lightly. "Call it intuition, but I always knew you'd be the one to win his heart. Michelle was never his favorite, and I can't say I blame him. Between you and I, Val was my favorite sister from the very day she and Michelle were born."

"She's my favorite, too," Abby said with a laugh.

Chris sighed and added, "I love both of them dearly, but Val isn't quite as intrusive as Michelle is."

Abby scoffed and replied, "You've got that right." I shook my head and laughed as she exchanged a few more words with Chris before he ushered her brother out of the tent.

Music began playing nearby, and we all formed a line in the order we'd been given. I softly kissed the side of Abby's head as she stood by my side, and she smiled. I knew how nervous she was, seeing as Michelle was standing nearly three feet away from us. She glared at both of us as her brother approached her through the opening in the tent. Her attention shifted from us to him as he ordered us to begin our trek down the white carpet. As we slowly reached the crowd, we were met by hundreds of stares. I hadn't realized that Matt and Val had invited so many people. As a matter-of-fact, I had no clue that they even knew this many people, but I avoided all eye contact, remaining focused on the task at hand. Upon reaching the altar, I felt Abby tense, her body becoming rigid as we parted. She calmly took her place beside Michelle, avoiding any physical contact as she smiled at her brother.

A moment passed before I realized exactly what had caused Abby's distraught reaction. Mr. and Mrs. Sanders were standing in the front row, intensely watching the daughter they never claimed, but their stares weren't offensive at all. Mr. Sanders exchanged glances between the sand beneath his feet and Abby while Mrs. Sanders pleadingly watched after her, almost as if she were hoping that she would meet her gaze, but it never moved. She remained focused on the ceremony, channeling her energy toward her brother, who needed it the most. To say the least, I was proud of her. She was controlling her emotions very well, except for the occasional tear, completely unaware of the chaos that consumed her, but she was surrounded by many people who loved her. Grams and Gramps were also in the front row on the opposite side, of course, along with each of our families. We'd spent so many years as one big family, and this day marked another anniversary of our continual growth. It was almost inevitable that all of our families would be here to witness it.

I sighed in relief as I removed my tuxedo. The ceremony had ended, and Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Sanders were preparing for the reception, as were each member of the wedding court. I quickly dressed in a white House of Syn T-shirt and Affliction jeans, adding a matching white bandana and a fedora afterward. As I spritzed myself with cologne, Abby entered the room. I smiled down at her, softly kissing her lips as I absorbed every detail of her wardrobe. She flaunted a tightly-fitted, dark purple, strapless dress with silver heels. Her beautiful, brown curls cascaded down her shoulders, illuminating her bright hazel eyes.

She smiled against my lips as I kissed her again. "You look sexy in white, baby."

"You look sexy in everything," I replied. She blushed as I reached for a stick of black eyeliner, pulling herself onto the counter next to me. "How long until the reception?"

She glanced at her BlackBerry before placing it inside the silver Coach bag she carried with her and replied, "We have fifteen minutes. That's plenty of time for a quickie." I couldn't help but laugh as I replaced the eyeliner. "Why are you laughing? Any woman that so much as glanced at you would want to have sex with you in her brother's bathroom, too," she whined. I sighed heavily as I stared at her, leaning against the wall with my arms crossed over my chest. She was, obviously, growing impatient, but I wanted her to beg. She turned to the keypad on the wall by the mirror, pressing a few buttons as Pleasure P's Feel the Rush bled from the stereo system. She raised a questioning eyebrow at me, and I just couldn't resist.

Our rendezvous ended nearly ten minutes later, and we spent the remaining five adjusting our wardrobes. With intertwined hands, Abby and I left her brother's house, joining the others in another tent for the reception. We took our reserved seats at a table with the other members of the wedding court, including Matt and Val. Jimmy briefly glanced at me before reaching for his cell phone. Minutes later, I received a text message.

You fucked in Matt's house, didn't you?

I chuckled as I replied, Yes, I did. Does that offend you?

No. In a way, it pisses me off, but then again, I'm proud of you.

Why? I had sex with my best friend's sister in his bathroom.

Why shouldn't I be, man? You did it before I could!

Thanks, I guess.

Anytime. Are you nervous?

I'd forgotten all about my plan. I could still feel the small box in my front left pocket, and as the reception began, the box seemed to get heavier. My heart pounded so hard inside my chest that I was sure everyone in the entire tent could hear it, but I knew I was paranoid. I simply replied, Nervous is an understatement.

Relax, Bri. When you're in the act, everything goes a lot smoother.

That's easy for you to say. You were alone when you did it.

I planned it that way, genius. You planned it this way, so grow a pair and just do it.

I sighed, choosing not to reply. Jimmy winked at me from across the table, and I smiled back. He was right. I'd been planning this for weeks. The rest of my life depended on this opportunity, and I wasn't going to let it pass me by. I watched as Matt opened a bottle of champagne, pouring the golden liquid into two glasses for himself and his bride. In that moment, I came to understand Abby's reason for turning to alcohol when she was upset. I'd never wanted to be so intoxicated in my entire life than I had now. It were as if every emotion Abby was feeling earlier today had somehow been transferred to me, but I couldn't let fear and anxiety keep me from asking the most important question I'd ever ask in my entire life.