Keep Digging Holes in The Desert

Vic and I walked in Jaime and I's house holding hands and giggling.
I forgot about whats been happening between Jaime and I.

"What the fuck, Val?" Jaime asked.

Fuck.
I let go if Vic and walked toward Jaime.

"I'm so fucking sorry. I-He apologized for everything and I just can't not forgive him."
"Why not?! Who was there for you to stop you from cutting?! Who was tere to hold you when you broke down?! Who was fucking there when you needed someone to help you?! Not Vic. I was. Jaime fucking Preciado was."
"I know. I'm so sorry. My feelings for Vic were still there! I can't let that go."
"Then you can let me go. How about you get your shit and leave. That would be best."

Then he left up to his room.
I stood there was the tears spilled over.
I just fucked up my friendship with my best friend.

"Hey, it's okay. Fuck him he's being a pussy."

That pissed me off.
I turned and glared at him.

"What? Vic he's not being a pussy. I lead him on. I kissed him back and I shouldn't have but I did. I have feelings for him but I have feelings for you that are stronger. I just don't know what to fucking do anymore!!"

I screamed and pulled at my hair while dropping to my knees.

"I can't do this anymore." I cried. "It's too much to handle.."

He bent down and picked me up.
He carried me up the stairs.
I just cried into his chest.
As he set me on the bed I stopped him.

"No not here. Not with Jaime here. Lets go to your house."
"Okay, you want to bring anything?"

I shakily stood up as I tried to control my breathing.
I grabbed a bag an shoved random clothes into it and my essentials.
Halfway through I stopped and sobbed a little.
Vic came over and helped me finish.
He then grabbed the bag as I grabbed my phone and followed him down the stairs.
I told Vic I'd be out in a minute.
I grabbed a paper and pencil and wrote Jaime a note.

I'm so sorry. I've never been so sorry in my life. I don't expect you to talk to me and you don't have to. Just know I still love you and always will. You'll always be my best friend forever and always. I won't ever be able to forgive myself for what I've done to you...
~Valerie

I put the note on the fridge and left.
I got into Vic's car and he drove off.
Vic grabbed my hand in reassurance.

I'm so confused.
I love Vic but I just lost my best friend.
Jaime never hurt anyone.
He didnt deserve this and I will never forgive myself.
I need to get away.
Take a long vacation from all of this..