Sequel: Until the End of Everything ›
Life, Love, and My Chemical Romance
It.
I don’t know why, but whenever I get nervous I eat. I stood in line, waiting to pile my plate with eggrolls. The food was Chinese, my favorite. I would only eat fast food if it were Chinese. McDonalds is number 2 on the list of things I dislike greatly. (Clowns are number 1.) Gerard was ahead of me, having pushed his way through the line. He has taught me that when guys are hungry, they will stop at nothing to get food. I was uneasy about Bob Bryar. If he didn’t show up, and if he didn’t want to be in the band, Gerard would probably ask Matt. He seemed so fond of his drumming, I can’t imagine why though.
I finally got my eggrolls and sat down besides Nicole. Gerard and Justin were deeply engaged in a conversation about some movie, “So what happened with the Drummer guy?” Nicole asked me.
“He wanted to be in the band again.”
“Eww.”
“I know. So we said no and got him to leave.”
“Weren’t you afraid that he’ll go all Cannibalistic and eat you?”
“What?!” I said through laughter. I have always found Cannibalism amusing. I don’t know why.
“He does look kind of… Caveman-ish.” She said. Nicole wasn’t laughing, she was trying to be serious. But then she bust out laughing with me.
“What’s so funny?” asked Gerard.
“We were comparing Matt to a cannibalistic caveman.” I replied, trying to be serious but bursting into laughter. Gerard and Justin joined in.
“Oh, well that’s not weird at all.” Said Justin.
“Oh, totally.” Said Gerard. We were all laughing so hard that I had completely forgotten to eat the eggrolls I had waited so patiently in line for.
I don’t know how Gerard and I got so lucky, but his parents were out for the night at some dinner party and Mikey was at a friends house. That gave us a room to… you know.
As we drove home in Nicole’s car, no one said anything except Nicole, and she was basically talking to herself. She always talked to herself as she drove. The tension in the car between Gerard and I was so thick I could barely move. As Nicole pulled up to Gerard’s house I looked over two houses and then down at my own. I unbuckled my seatbelt and sighed. A small smile formed on my face. My stomach twisted and turned rapidly to the same quick beat my heart skipped. I was scared but at the same time very anxious, worried yet strangely excited.
Gerard helped me out of the car like the gentleman he was and didn’t let go of my hand, even as Nicole drove away, even as he unlocked the door, even as we climbed up the stairs. I didn’t mind. His warm hand against my cold one was soothing.
When we got into his room, I didn’t know what to do. He sat down on his twin bed, and I sat down next to him. I smoothed out the big ballerina like skirt on my dress when Gerard began to talk, “Marilyn, are you sure you’re ready to do this?” he asked. For a nanosecond I wanted to scream ‘No!’ but I didn’t.
“I am.” I said. I really loved Gerard, wasn’t that all that mattered? Didn’t that indicate that I was ready?
“Before we uhh…” he began quietly. His shyness made me smile really big, it was the cute thing again,”I just wanted to say I love you.”
“I love you too Gerard,” I told him, “so much.” After that, we kind of sat there, not knowing what to do next. Finally I got up and was about to go to the bathroom to take off my dress, when I looked back and Gerard’s face had a confused look on it. Instead I stayed and decided to undress in front of him. My heart beat quicker than it ever had as I tried to unzipper the back of my dress, “Can you help me?” I asked awkwardly. He quickly got up and unzipped it. I knew we were doing it all wrong, but I didn’t care. So far I liked it. I took off everything except the black and lime green lacy lingerie I had on underneath. I looked over at Gerard who quickly looked away and began to unbutton his shirt. I smirked quietly and watched. He had stared at me; doesn’t that mean I’m allowed to stare at him?
Soon he wore nothing but dark green boxers. Dark green is my favorite color on Gerard, but personally, I prefer him not wearing it. I sat down next to Gerard and we kissed, passionately. I liked it. A lot. I didn’t even mind when he played with my bra, and he didn’t even say anything when I felt his chest. Which was really nice. But right when he unhooked my bra, he pulled away. He had a weird look on his face.
Then my cell phone went off. I looked over at it on his night stand.
“Friday December 9th: 8 Weeks are up”
And then disaster struck.
Gerard passed out.
“On my heart I'll bear the shame
No prayer can ease the pain
No one will love you
No one will love you the way I do
No one will love you
Love you like I do”
I finally got my eggrolls and sat down besides Nicole. Gerard and Justin were deeply engaged in a conversation about some movie, “So what happened with the Drummer guy?” Nicole asked me.
“He wanted to be in the band again.”
“Eww.”
“I know. So we said no and got him to leave.”
“Weren’t you afraid that he’ll go all Cannibalistic and eat you?”
“What?!” I said through laughter. I have always found Cannibalism amusing. I don’t know why.
“He does look kind of… Caveman-ish.” She said. Nicole wasn’t laughing, she was trying to be serious. But then she bust out laughing with me.
“What’s so funny?” asked Gerard.
“We were comparing Matt to a cannibalistic caveman.” I replied, trying to be serious but bursting into laughter. Gerard and Justin joined in.
“Oh, well that’s not weird at all.” Said Justin.
“Oh, totally.” Said Gerard. We were all laughing so hard that I had completely forgotten to eat the eggrolls I had waited so patiently in line for.
I don’t know how Gerard and I got so lucky, but his parents were out for the night at some dinner party and Mikey was at a friends house. That gave us a room to… you know.
As we drove home in Nicole’s car, no one said anything except Nicole, and she was basically talking to herself. She always talked to herself as she drove. The tension in the car between Gerard and I was so thick I could barely move. As Nicole pulled up to Gerard’s house I looked over two houses and then down at my own. I unbuckled my seatbelt and sighed. A small smile formed on my face. My stomach twisted and turned rapidly to the same quick beat my heart skipped. I was scared but at the same time very anxious, worried yet strangely excited.
Gerard helped me out of the car like the gentleman he was and didn’t let go of my hand, even as Nicole drove away, even as he unlocked the door, even as we climbed up the stairs. I didn’t mind. His warm hand against my cold one was soothing.
When we got into his room, I didn’t know what to do. He sat down on his twin bed, and I sat down next to him. I smoothed out the big ballerina like skirt on my dress when Gerard began to talk, “Marilyn, are you sure you’re ready to do this?” he asked. For a nanosecond I wanted to scream ‘No!’ but I didn’t.
“I am.” I said. I really loved Gerard, wasn’t that all that mattered? Didn’t that indicate that I was ready?
“Before we uhh…” he began quietly. His shyness made me smile really big, it was the cute thing again,”I just wanted to say I love you.”
“I love you too Gerard,” I told him, “so much.” After that, we kind of sat there, not knowing what to do next. Finally I got up and was about to go to the bathroom to take off my dress, when I looked back and Gerard’s face had a confused look on it. Instead I stayed and decided to undress in front of him. My heart beat quicker than it ever had as I tried to unzipper the back of my dress, “Can you help me?” I asked awkwardly. He quickly got up and unzipped it. I knew we were doing it all wrong, but I didn’t care. So far I liked it. I took off everything except the black and lime green lacy lingerie I had on underneath. I looked over at Gerard who quickly looked away and began to unbutton his shirt. I smirked quietly and watched. He had stared at me; doesn’t that mean I’m allowed to stare at him?
Soon he wore nothing but dark green boxers. Dark green is my favorite color on Gerard, but personally, I prefer him not wearing it. I sat down next to Gerard and we kissed, passionately. I liked it. A lot. I didn’t even mind when he played with my bra, and he didn’t even say anything when I felt his chest. Which was really nice. But right when he unhooked my bra, he pulled away. He had a weird look on his face.
Then my cell phone went off. I looked over at it on his night stand.
“Friday December 9th: 8 Weeks are up”
And then disaster struck.
Gerard passed out.
“On my heart I'll bear the shame
No prayer can ease the pain
No one will love you
No one will love you the way I do
No one will love you
Love you like I do”