This One's For You

Austin's POV:

I can’t get her out of my head.

I don’t understand why either. She was just a fan, some girl that happened to run into Alan and I at our favorite coffee shop. So why can’t I stop thinking about her? Her long, dark blonde hair that framed her face in such a way I can’t even describe? Her big eyes, the most peculiar shade of green I've ever seen? Her delicate, porcelain skin that looked so soft I had to actually hold back from touching it?

What was wrong with me.

I had to get her out of my head. It didn't make sense for me to be thinking this much about one girl.

All these thoughts were racing through my head while I sat in the back lounge of the tour bus. Our tour hadn't started yet but sometimes I liked to sit in here and think. I groan to myself as I put my head in my hands. Right then, Alan walked in.

He takes one look at me and says "Hey man, what's been up with you these past few days"

"I think I'm broken dude" I sigh.

He gives me a look and then comes over and sits on my lap like a child.

"I know you're trying to make me laugh, but it won't work" I say to him in a melancholy tone.

In a cute little kid voice, Alan says "Come onnnn bro, cheer up. Tell me what your deal is"

I sigh again "Alright man, I'll tell you. Remember that girl Ariana we saw while we were getting coffee the other day? Yeah, I can't get her out of my head. I don't know what's wrong with me" I put my head in my hands again.

Alan says sarcastically "Uh dude, it's called being attracted to someone. It happens sometimes you know"

All I can do is groan to myself.

Alan sighs, and moves off my lap to sit next to me. He says in a softer tone "Look, if you really can't stop thinking about her, maybe you should try to look for her at the show she's gonna be at."

"How am I supposed to find her there? There's gonna be so many people..." I complain.

"Why don't you just give the front a description of her and her name so when she gets there they can send her backstage. Then you can see her again, and talk to her. And perk the fuck up because we're not feeling this mood you've been in." Alan says to me.

I say "You know, that's not a bad idea... I think I'll do that. But is it just me, or is it wrong for me to think of her like this? I mean, what if she's like 16? I'm 25, I can't fucking do that."

"No way man, she has a tattoo so she's gotta be at least 18. I don't think it's weird at all, you like who you like" He says with a wink.

"Yeah I suppose you're right. This is all so weird for me though, I don't think I've ever felt this way about a girl I just met. And I mean, I haven't been with anyone since the whole Crissy disaster. I don't know, I'm probably thinking too far into this." I say, mostly to myself.

"Wow, you must really be stuck on this girl, this isn't like you at all." Alan says.

"I know! That's my problem. I don't know what's fucking wrong with me. I just need to be distracted right now." I say.

Alan says, with a sly smile "I know the perfect way to get distracted. I'll be right back" And with that, he promptly leaves the lounge.

Well this should be interesting. God only knows what kind of scheme he's thought up to get me distracted. As I sat there and waited for him to get back, my thoughts again turned to her. I thought again of her delicate, porcelain skin and how I had seen the scars on her wrists when I had gone in to hug her. It absolutely broke my heart, that someone or something could make a beautiful girl like her do that to herself. No one should ever have to feel that way, ever. When I hugged her I almost couldn't let go, in fear she would break apart. She just seems so delicate. When I looked into her eyes, I could tell she had the weight of the world on her shoulders.

And as I was thinking this, I realized then that I intended to free her of that weight, no matter what.

As I came to this conclusion, Alan walks in again with Aaron, Tino, Phil, and Justin Trotta in tow.

Of course they had a shit ton of alcohol with them.

"The party has arrived!" Aaron said loudly.

"Yeah, we're all here to help you perk up buttercup." Tino said.

I couldn't help but smile. "Thanks guys, this is great. Now lets get fucking wasted!"

As we all started to down drinks while listening to kick-ass music, I couldn't help but think about Ariana one last time before I lost my sense.

I wonder what she's doing right now. Is she thinking of me?

She was the last thing on my mind before the alcohol took affect, and I didn't think about anything else except what a great fucking time I was having.