Babe, I'm Gonna Leave You

I had been sitting on Niall’s couch, mindlessly watching television for at least forty five minutes until I heard him coming down the stairs. I fought back the urge to look over my shoulder at him, in fear that it might seem to weird for whatever reason. Instead, I pretended like I hadn’t heard him at all until he spoke up.

“I didn’t expect ya to still be here,” he said in a surprisingly groggy voice that made him seem older than he was for a brief moment.

A sheepish smile found its way to my lips, but I still managed to raise an eyebrow in question at him. Was I not supposed to be here? Maybe I really should have left when I woke up. “Wow, I’m really sorry. I can--”

“No, no... No,” he chuckled as he motioned for me to follow him into the kitchen as he walked while he talked. “You should know that’s not what I meant.” He paused for a moment. “What I mean is, I meant exactly what I said, with no double meaning. I really didn’t think you’d be here, because now that I don’t have so much alcohol in my blood, I’m realizing that it may be a little weird or off-putting that I asked you to stay the night...” He trailed off and was now sitting on the counter top while he sipped on a bottle of water he had gotten from the refrigerator.

Even though this at first seemed like a comforting speech to ease my nerves, it had really failed toward the end. He must have noticed when I looked down at my hands that I placed on the table in front of me.

“It’s just a bit forward of me. It wasn’t weird for me because I know ya, Josie.” He offered a crooked smile and continued. “Just worried it might be a bit odd for you--” He stopped and seemed completely unsatisfied with what he was saying. I kept looking at him with furrowed eyebrows because I wasn’t exactly sure where he was going with all the words he managed to string together.

He groaned quietly and then laughed at himself. “Why don’t we know each other better, Josie? That’s what I’m trying to get at, really.” I smiled helplessly and instantly at the blonde, blue eyed boy sitting across the room from me. He seemed so genuine as he cocked his head to the left and looked at me. It was a good question and I wanted the answer too.

“We should fix it,” I stated simply. I thought about getting up from my seat at the table to stand closer to him, but I quickly brushed off the thought because I couldn’t muck up the courage to do it.

“Please, let’s.” He breathed, offered a long smile, and when I blushed, he sipped his water again.

~

Two evenings after I spent the night at Niall’s, I was standing in the line at the grocery store. While waiting for my turn to be checked out, I looked to my bottom left and saw a teen magazine. I laughed inwardly at the nostalgic memories of when I was twelve, begging my mom to buy me the exact same magazine. I was about to turn my head until I noticed all the members of One Direction in the center. They were all smiling their dazzling smiles and I couldn’t help but smile myself. And although I was smiling, I still felt a little pang of sadness in my heart for I felt that for some strange reason, I wouldn’t be seeing them for a long while. Maybe another year and a half like before. It felt different than before. I hadn’t realized how much I missed them all until I saw them again.

I shook my head subtly, trying to get myself out of my own thoughts. And besides, the cashier was chewing her lip impatiently waiting for me to put my groceries on the belt.

I was walking home with the bags cradled in my arms. The wind was cold and encompassing, and the only thing I could think of was getting home to my cozy apartment and wrapping up on the couch. The walk seemed infinitely long and my brain was getting restless. When I finally reached the stairs to my apartment, I was more than thrilled. And in that excitement, I stumbled on the first step, hitting my shin harshly and dropping the paper bags around me. I cursed briefly under my breath, but quickly regained my composure as I realized it was only groceries and it could be worse. When I finally stood up, however, I cursed again because my shin was throbbing.

“This is just a weird night.” I mumbled to myself. I had left the groceries sloppily on my small kitchen table and quickly grabbed some ice to put on my leg. In hopes that some fresh air might ease my pain, or somehow vanish the funny empty feeling I felt when I saw the magazine cover at the grocery store, I sat on my fire escape outside of my apartment.

I closed my eyes softly and rested my head against the brick. The wind was calming me down and I felt a tightness from my chest loosen.

“Uh,” I heard someone’s voice. I looked up quickly and saw Niall--the absolute last person I expected to see. But the first one I wanted to see. “Your door was unlocked... I know that’s creepy, but I figured I wasn’t a serial killer an’ it’d be alright, because we’re friends and--” He said in one breath and didn’t even look at me all the while until he stopped. And when he did, he smiled--a full smile showing off his braces.

“What brings you over here? And, also, how did you know where I lived?” I asked, laughing at the realization.

He slouched down beside me and looked ahead at the streetlights along with me. “I asked Harry.” Simple enough. “An’ the real reason I’m over here,” he trailed off for a moment. I stared closely at him, interested to know. “My life’s right lame when we’re not doing band stuff. An’ I said we should get to know each other better, so I had some free time...”

“That makes me feel like a lovely last resort,” I laughed and he bumped into my shoulder playfully.

“Hush!” He rolled his head on the wall to look at me. “D’ya wanna go out to get some food or somethin’?”

“It’s always about food with you, Niall...”

He opened his mouth to protest, but realized it was the truth and instead shut his mouth quickly, holding in a laugh.

“But I’ve banged up my leg,” I said and lifted the bag of ice to show him the wound. “I don’t think I could walk much anywhere, even if I wanted.”

His face looked quite shocked upon seeing my leg and I just watched his reaction, completely forgetting about my leg in that moment. His eyebrows raised at first and then slowly furrowed together as his always present smile fell into a frown. “Josie...” His voice snapped me out of my thoughts, and I looked at him.

He stared at me longer than he should have and I could feel my heart beating against my chest.

“Is it alright if I put a bandage on it for you?” He asked gently and with the way he was looking at me, I nodded my head in a Niall-induced trance.

He helped me hobble into my bathroom as he supported my body with his side and arm. Almost as if he were afraid to touch me, he graced my hips with his hands and placed me on top of the counter with the sink and then quickly pulled his hands away. My stomach was doing flips and I had completely forgotten about my leg.

Watching him put the bandage on my cut--the way he looked down so concentrated, the way he licked his lips in focus--made my head swim. I was getting frustrated with myself. The tension between us was making me go crazy and I just wanted to get to know him better.

“That should do it, yeah.” He stated instead of asked and placed his hands on his hips, looking down proudly at his work. I let out a laugh and shook my head at his silliness.

“Well, due to your clumsy incident, miss Josie,” he said while leaning his head against the wall lightly, smiling crookedly. “This proposes a perfect opportunity--much better than I had in mind.” His eyes were beaming.

“What do you mean?”

“You can’t go anywhere even if you wanted, so that presents me with the perfect chance to talk to you until your ears fall off.” He chuckled at himself and added, “and there’s not much you can do about it.”

“Niall, you’re more than right,” I said, stretching out my good leg to tap my foot around the back of his kneecap playfully, all while keeping eye contact with his beautiful blue eyes. I smiled and finished, “But I could call the cops.”