Girl Corrupted

"Maria Bennett!" The nurse called while walking into my room. She handed me my daily medication and watched as I pretended to take it.

"Stupid bitch." I murmured as she walked out. I took out the two pink pills from under my tongue and placed it under my pillow. It was supposed to make me feel relaxed. I hated the feeling though.

I've been in this mental institution for 3 years now, ever since I was 13. A "suicide attempt", as their records say.
My mother said she didn't wanna lose me at such a young age, but we all know damn well that she didn't want me. She thought I was a danger to myself, a physco, so she sent me 100 miles away.
I hate this place and I hate all the staff. Especially my therapist. She tries to get inside my head, she wants to know things.

I've attempted to commit suicide here too, that's why I've been here so long. Every time you try or do something harmful to yourself they extend your visit. WHICH I believe is complete bullshit but hey, my mom doesn't mind.
My dad was suicidal too, that's where I get it from. He blew his brains out when I was 7 years old, right in front of me. Explains why I'm such a mental fuck up.
I resent my mom heavily for sending me here, pulling me out of school to stay at this shit hole.
I get "home-schooled" though. I might as well consider this place home now. But a professor comes here Monday-Thursday to teach me new things. Not like I will use it in the future, if I have a future.

"Yo Mars," Karen called.
"I told you not to fucking call me that, what the fuck," I said angrily, "how many fucking times do I have to fucking tell you?"
"I'm sorry I forgot," said Karen sympathetically, "calm down."

Karen was the first person I met when I came to this shit hole. She had been here 5 months prior til the time I came. She was the one who showed me the ropes and all that.

"Pills?" I said.
Karen nodded her head.
I took the pills from under my pillow and handed them to her. I guess she liked the effects of them, I sure as hell didn't.
"Thanks, oh and I overheard Mrs.Shane talking, she said someone new is coming here." She said
Someone new? Oh fuck
"No problem," i started, "and who do you think this new person is?"
"I don't know, all I know is that they're crazy just like us." She replied.
I shrugged my shoulders and watched as Karen exited my room.

I didn't share a room with anyone, considering the fact that I had personality disorder.
I fucking hated people, but I tried not to let myself drown in my thoughts.

I decided to get up and go see what everyone else was up to.
I walked into the recreational room and my anxiety started acting up like always. I don't know what it was with me, every time I saw a certain amount of people I started to get nervous.

"Oh look who came out of their cave." James taunted.
Calm down Maria. Calm down. It's not worth it.
"Ha ha ha, very funny." I replied sarcastically as I took a seat next to Isabella.
"Just messing with you." He explained.
Fucking asshole.
"So did you hear about the new person that's coming?" Isabella joined.
Damn, shit gets around quick.
"Oh yeah I did actually." I stammered.
"I hope it's a hot girl." James added.
"No I hope it's a hot guy!" Isabella debated.
Oh shut the fuck up all of you.
"I don't care who it is really," i stated as I was getting up from my seat, "as long as their nice."

I left the recreational room not even stopping to hear what Isabella or James had to say.
They were always arguing about stupid shit, I didn't feel like listening.
Although I acted like I didn't care who was coming, I really did.
Believe it or not, I hoped for a boy. A cute one would be nice.
I was tired of all the assholes in the institution I just wanted to really meet someone new.

As I was walking down the hall, I was stopped by my therapist.
"Maria," she announced, "may I have a word with you?"
Oh my god, just what the fuck I need.
"Sure." I uttered.
I reluctantly walked into her office and sat down at the desk.
She walked in after me and shut the door.

"I know you haven't spoke to your mom in a while," she explained, "but she would like to see you."
I was dumbfounded.
Now she wants to see me? After 3 years? Something was up. I could feel it.
"Okay." I said puzzled, "when?"
"Thursday." Mrs. Jackal answered.
It was only Tuesday, but the days go by fast around here.
"Alright." I said while getting up from the chair.

I exited her office and continued to walk down the hallway.
My mom wants to see me? After all this time? Just wait until she get's here, I'm gonna give her an earful.
I went back into my room and laid on my bed,
"It's only 8 o'clock, dammit." I said to myself.

The rest of the night I was just wondering who it was gonna be.
And I needed to know when they were coming to. I know Karen already knew. She's ALWAYS eavesdropping on Mrs. Shane.

I just hoped for a boy.