Know Your Enemy

“Louis, no,” I demanded, sticking out my hand and curling my fingers into my palm. “Let me drive. You’re way too loaded to be in the driver’s seat right now.”

“I’m fine,” he insisted, his tone nowhere near as slurred as earlier. “The fight sobered me up. And it’s not proper for a girl to drive. I’ll be okay.”

I didn’t want to believe him, but I wasn’t remotely in the mood for another argument, so I just climbed into the passenger’s seat. Once I was settled, I rested my aching, hot forehead against the cool window, closing my eyes for a second as the pain started to subside. “I can’t believe I did that,” I muttered, flicking out my tongue and tasting coppery blood on my lips.

My parents would kill me if they saw me all beaten, and I was more thankful than ever that they weren’t the types to stay up and worry, and when they saw me the next morning, I’d be perfectly covered and disguised with makeup.

“Neither can I,” Louis agreed, pulling to a slow stop at a red light. “But, like, you were totally badass. You definitely lost, but you actually held your own against Lana. And how many fights have you been in during your life?”

I coughed and replied, “None.”

“Exactly. But underneath all that cheerleading uniform and cute little rich-girl dresses, there’s a total badass in you.”

I felt my face burn with embarrassment, not sure whether I should take Louis’ declaration as a compliment or not. On one hand, I thought that being tough among the people he usually hung around with was a positive thing, but I wasn’t sure if tough was something I really wanted to be.

“I meant it in a good way,” he clarified, probably seeing the confusion all over my face. “It really surprised me. I like finding out more things about you.”

I knew it was probably the remnants of the alcohol talking, but still found my cheeks reddening even more. And then, to top it all off and make my head want to explode, Louis reached over and took my hand in his.

My heart started to race as I realized that he very possibly might have been trying to make a move on me. And while I liked him and thought he was cute and sweet and hysterical, I couldn’t date him. The two of us would never be able to go steady. People on my side of the tracks would whisper behind our backs when we walked through the hallways, asking what I was doing, slumming like that. And Louis’ group would think that Louis was after me just for my money and status, or maybe spread rumors that he was doing inappropriate things with me to justify sinking so low as to date me, someone they saw as a vapid bitch.

I knew Louis didn’t think that way, but it wasn’t just about us. It was about what everyone else would think of it. I had a status to uphold, and if just thinking about what Hailey would say was making me cringe, I didn’t even want to think about the reactions of the other girls on the squad.

But I couldn’t figure out a way to retract my hand without seeming rude or hurting his feelings. So I just kind of left it there, gnawing on my lip and willing him to take it away and apologize for being too forward.

“This is your place, right?” Louis asked.

I glanced out the window, my eyebrows raised when I saw that we were actually sitting in front of my house. “How did you know where I lived?”

His face turned bright crimson as he coughed and said, “It’s written on the wall in the boys’ room with your number right under it.”

My heart stopped for a second before I brushed it off. There was no reason to get hurt by it. I was a prominent, well-known face and name throughout the senior class, so it was only natural that they’d write my name there.

“Hey, I’m sorry,” Louis whispered, leaning over and letting his hand hover over my hair for a second before choosing to rest it on my shoulder instead. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“I’m not upset,” I replied. “I’m fine. Thank you for taking me to the party and taking me home. And if you see Harlow, please tell her that I’m sorry about the fight and that I hope we can still be friends.” Just thinking about the possibility of letting Harlow slip out of my grip made me want to cry. She really was a sweet girl, and I was just trying to warn her that Lana and her crew were the last people Harlow would want to associate with.

I reached for the door handle, ready to throw it open and let in the chilly night air, but Louis grabbed my arm and stopped me from doing so.

“Clara, can you just listen for a second?”

My stomach clenched, knowing what was coming next. He was going to ask me why Lana and I hated each other, for the real reason, and I was going to have to confess everything to him. But even scarier about the possibility of him asking was that I didn’t think I had the willpower to lie to him.

“I’m sorry if this makes you uncomfortable, but I just have to let you know that I really, really like you. And I’ll probably regret saying it in the morning, since I think I’m drunker than I thought, but it’s true. I’ve been keeping an eye on you in the hallways, at Cal’s Diner when everyone goes, and I keep my eyes on locked on you during the duration of every football game. You’re the only reason I go to football games. I don’t even get football.”

I felt a flutter in my chest that I cursed myself for getting. How could I get jacketed by someone who didn’t have a letterman’s jacket? And I couldn’t submit him to the torture he’d receive by hanging around with me.

So instead, I said, “Louis, you’re an incredible sweetheart, and I love spending time with you. But I have to go in now.”

His face fell. Clearly, he’d been expecting me to say some confession back, that I’d felt the same way, but I couldn’t.

“Goodnight, Louis,” I whispered, reaching up and cupping his cheek with my hand, running my thumb along his cheekbone. He closed his eyes in content at my touch, just for a second, and then I climbed out of the car and started up toward the door.

I knew I liked Louis, deep down in my soul, but there was no way I could ever give him the time of day. Ever.