More Than This

Shaun sat in the driver’s seat; his back slumped hard against the leather.
He nervously rolled his bottom lip between his teeth.
He took one last look in the mirror, tightening his black silk tie before slamming the visor shut.

"I don't think I can do this..." he mumbled as he twiddled his thumbs in his lap, "is it my fault I lost her?" he asked slowly looking to his passenger. The champagne colored French bulldog let out an unenthused whimper, "shut up Rambo..." he snapped at the dog only to receive a snort, Shaun looked up, reaching over softly he straightened the bow tie that was attached to his collar.

Shaun was startled by two knuckles banging at the window.

"Jesus Christ, could you be a little more subtle?" Shaun hissed as he cracked the door open to his brother Jesse, who was wearing a suit almost identical to Shaun's, all black except Jesse was wearing a pair of Converse.

"Maybe if you were paying attention-" Jesse snapped as Shaun stepped out of the car, handing the leash to Jesse letting him lead the dog. Jesse furrowed his brows when he noticed Shaun reaching into the backseat grabbing at two bouquets, "what...the fuck?" Jesse asked, his mouth hanging open wide.

Shaun held his arms up, a bouquet in each hand, "This one-" he mumbled holding up a coral and white bouquet of tulips, calla lilies, peonies, and anemones, "is for one of the bridesmaids. She hit the mimosas a little hard this morning and sat on her bouquet. And these-" Shaun said, letting out an exasperated breath as he showed off the dozen yellow roses, "are for Tate...just to make her day a little better."

Jesse arched a brow before shaking his head, "You two have the most fucked up relationship, ever. I mean seriously," Jesse prodded, "she’s getting married and here you are getting her flowers to make her day better. Should she really need someone to make her day better? Isn't this the day girls wait for?"

Shaun was resisting the urge to deck his older brother; he loved Jesse, but Jesus Christ.

"Let's just get inside okay?" Shaun snapped, "And would you drop it? She doesn't love me-" Jesse let out another harsh laugh.

"If you believe that you're as damn dumb as she is!"

"Whatever," he groaned, "let's just get inside."

"Hold up," Jesse managed through his laugh as a silver Mercedes squealed into the parking lot, "Kari's here..."

Tatum Rowan was one of a kind.
She preferred to be called Tate, she liked her tea a little too strong and she couldn't function without caffeine, lots of it. She loved to snowboard but couldn't ski to save her life, and she loved to roller blade, which she believed was a lost art and she loved to boast about her skateboarding skills, even if she could only ride downhill. She had turned a room in her house into a closet, just for shoes and bags, all 700 pairs of which were high heels, but at 5'1" she felt she needed heels every day, she even wore them to the grocery store.

Shaun and Tate met at the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver.
She was an intern for the International Olympics Committee.
And from that moment, it was love.

Shaun had dropped the bouquet off in the bridesmaid’s dressing room, at which point he was told Tate had asked to be alone in her room.

"Come on Rambo," Shaun mumbled quietly as the dog practically had to run at his side just to keep up with Shaun's unusually large steps, "let's go see momma..."

He stopped at the white French doors, he went to knock, but stopped, smiling as he pressed his ear to the door. He could hear her humming along to the song that was playing. He waited for a moment, gathering courage before he knocked quietly.

"Shaun?" her sweet voice played from the other side of the door as the music suddenly became quiet.

"Yeah babe..." he called, the door quickly swung open.

But he stopped.
The sight before him nearly brought tears to his eyes.
His heart thudded inside his chest.

She was in a fitted white Vera Wang gown, at her knees the fabric flowed elegantly like a mermaid. A black sash tied around her waist, and a matching black headpiece was holding her chestnut colored hair in its elegant up-do.

"So?" she asked nervously, shifting back and forth nervously.

"You look..." he stopped, he felt like he was going to be sick, "you look perfect Tate..." she smiled, stepping aside so Shaun could come in. Closing the door behind him she excitedly kicked off her heels and plopped onto the floor excitedly patting her lap only for Rambo to leap on, licking at her face, "he's going to get your dress dirty-" Shaun started.

"I don't care," Tate began kissing Rambo who was now so excited he was snorting, right on his wet cold nose, "I missed my baby!" she squealed but Rambo's nose took to the sky as he began to sniff hard, "He totally smells the cheese tray-" Tate began as the dog leaped from her lap running to the table, jumping short in an attempt to reach the cheese.

Tate held up her hands to which Shaun grabbed, pulling her up. She quickly slipped her shoes back on instantly growing four inches, "these," Shaun began holding out the bouquet, "are for the beautiful bride..." Tate smiled wide, the dimples forming in her perfect pink cheeks.

"They're gorgeous Shaun..." she said taking the bouquet, instantly taking a large whiff.

"and-" he started as he dug deep in the pocket of his pants before quickly revealing a box, he reached over popping the lid open to reveal rose gold and diamond studs.

"Shaun!" Tate cried excitedly, "They are perfect!" he smiled before he reached up removing the pearl earrings she was already wearing before putting them in gently.

"They don't match your ring but-" Tate shook her head excitedly before taking Shaun into a hug.

Shaun pulled away grabbing her finger, "Let me get a good look," twirling her quickly, but he stopped, noticing the back of her dress was bare, "where's the heart?" he asked. Tate bit at her lip.

"I didn't do it, Jay thought it was stupid..." she said quietly.

Tate's grandfather has passed away two months ago and she had taken one of his blue shirts with the intention of cutting a small heart out and sewing it into the back of her wedding dress. It would be her way of having him there with her.

"He is such an ass!" Shaun nearly screamed, but he stopped as he heard the door swing open.

It was Jenna, Tate's mother who looked elegant in a floor length black gown.

"Hi Shaun," she said sweetly, offering a smile only to have the lanky red-head pull her into a hug.

"Mama Jen, you look stunning..." Shaun cooed, earning a smile from the woman who had been like his second mother.

"And you," Jenna said, straightening Shaun's tie, "you look so handsome." Shaun offered a cheeky smile, but he glanced over watching as Tate checked her reflection one last time.

Shaun's heart fell as he watched Tate take one last big breath, letting it out slowly.

"Ready?" Jenna asked. Tate bit at her lip, thinking for a moment before offering a half-hearted smile at Shaun. He watched as Tate's hands began to tremble.

"Shaun..." she squeaked. He breathing sped up with every passing second.

Shaun wanted with every fiber of his being to tell her not to marry him. To tell her they could be more than this. They could be more than friends. He wanted her to know that they could be the couple everyone envied. He wanted to tell her that, even though he knew she deserved better, that he would spend the rest of his life doing every single thing in his power to make her happy.

But instead he swallowed his pride.

Shaun opened his arms, taking her shaking body close.

He placed a soft kiss on the top of her head.

"Am I doing the right thing?" her muffled voice asked before her blue eyes connected with his.

"I can’t answer that Tate..." Shaun spoke honestly reaching up, brushing her tear away with his callused thumb, "only you can..."

"Sweetheart," Jenna interjected softly, "it's time. Your father is waiting..."

Tate reached up, placing a soft kiss on Shaun's pale cheek, before her mother took her hand.

"Love you jellybean..." Tate mumbled at Shaun, he managed a smile before nervously tucking his hands deep in his pockets.

"Love you too sunshine..." Shaun managed a mumbled before Jenna pulled Tate out of the room.

Shaun watched until he knew he was alone, closing his eyes he blinked away the tears he had desperately been fighting. Taking one last deep breath he walked out, he walked through the double doors, then quickly down the aisle joining his siblings in the second pew.

"You okay man?" leaned in mumbling softly. Shaun just shook his head 'yes'.

Shaun glanced around, this was everything Tate never wanted, a church wedding with tacky music and too many people she didn't know. Jason was everything Tate wasn't, and he was molding her into his perfect little Barbie.

"Man-" Jesse mumbled, elbowing Shaun. Shaun hadn't noticed the music playing, or that everyone around him had stood, anxiously awaiting Tate's arrival. Shaun rolled his eyes at the sight of Jason taking his place at the altar. When Jason caught Shaun staring he offered a smug smile. Shaun mumbled a 'son-of-a-bitch' under his breath, but a collective gasp filled the church.

Shaun turned, watching as Tate walked down the aisle, arm linked with her fathers.

Shaun's heart fell as Tate and her father arrived at the altar.
He had to fight the tears as Tate's father placed her hand in Jason's.

The preacher stepped forward, smiling.

"Welcome everyone. We are gathered here today in the sight of God and angels, and the presence of all of you, friends and loved ones, to celebrate one of life's greatest moments, to give recognition to the worth and beauty of love, and to add our best wishes and blessings to the words which shall unite these two souls in holy matrimony. Let us begin by asking the age old question, who gives this bride to her groom?" he began, Tate reached up, dabbing at her eyes.

"I her father, and her mother." her father said firmly. He kissed her cheek one last time before falling into the seat beside Jenna. The preacher nodded, opening his black leather bible before glancing between Tate and Jason.

"Today is truly a glorious day which the Lord has made - as today both of you are blessed with God's greatest of all gifts, the gift of abiding love and devotion. All present here today - and those who are only here in heart and memory - wish both of you all the joy, happiness and success and the world has to offer." Tate let out a low sob, Shaun knew it was at the thought of her grandpa, and how he couldn't be here and he had to resist getting up and knocking Jason's head off as he rolled his eyes, "Before we proceed," the man asked, looking out, his eyes scanning everyone in the audience, "I must ask, is there anyone present who believes these two should not be joined..."

Shaun bit at his lip, but his heart fluttered as his eyes connected with Tate's.

Tate turned to the man, and for the first time she had stopped shaking.

"Me..." the preacher's eyes went wide and Jason's mouth fell open as she yanked her hands away. She reached up, pulling the ring softly off of her tiny finger. Holding it out she grabbed Jason's hand, folding it between his palm and fingers before turning to the audience, walking slowly down the steps, "Shaun..."

Shaun's mouth tugged into a wide smile. He stood up, pushing his way down the aisle, practically tripping over everyone's legs.

Shaun reached the end of the aisle, stopping for a moment Tate looked up at him, biting her lip.

"If you'll have me?" she asked lowly.

"Tatum Elizabeth Rowan," Shaun began as he took her hands in his, "since the moment I met you I've wanted you and since the moment I lost you I have hated myself." Shaun spoke, holding at her hands as if his life depended on it, "I can't promise I won't be an idiot," Shaun spoke, making Tate let out a small laugh, "because I'm pretty damn good at it. But I can promise that as long as you'll have me you will be my everything." tears streamed down Tate's face, cutting though her elegant make-up, "seeing him," Shaun started, glancing over at Jason, who was being held back by two of his groomsman, "seeing him hold you, it killed me, because you belong in my arms. You always have..." Shaun reached up, wiping at her tears, "besides," he said, earning a wide smile, "I can't raise Rambo by myself..."

"I hear being a single parent is pretty tough..." Tate mumbled before offering a quick wink.

"You know if you walk out those doors with me you're stuck with me, right?" Shaun asked, glancing between Tate and the double doors. Not giving an ounce about the hateful and nasty looks they were receiving.

Tate smiled.

"Promise?" she quirked. Shaun smiled wide.

Gently taking her face into his hands he pressed his lips to hers.

He reached down, taking her hand in his before pulling her down the aisle.

"Promise..."