A Far Cry From Innocence.

Nathan and I sat on the couch in the studio, hands linked together like he had never left in the first place. We laughed with the guys, we conversed, we drank, we danced. Occasionally I would see Zacky's pained face looking at us, but he mostly seemed to avoid looking in my direction.

"Mind if I kidnap your boy-toy for a minute?" Without waiting for me to even react to his question, Brian was dragging Nathan up and out. Johnny had left early complaining about being tired, and Matt and Jimmy had followed Brian to smoke and get more drinks. That left me alone with Zacky, who didn't even want to look at me.

The silence was thick and uncomfortable, but I wasn't the one to break it. "You seem to be happy that Nate's back." He didn't look at me, just pretended to be tune his guitar and play a few chords from An Epic Of Time Wasted.

I nodded slowly, wishing he hadn't brought up this subject then wondering why it seemed to make me more uncomfortable than it seemed to make him. "Yeah. I really didn't think I'd ever see him again." I watched him continue to pretend like he was too preoccupied to look at me.

"That's good. I'm glad you're happy."

"Yeah. Thanks." I watched him and started to wring my hands, figuring it was either now or never to talk to him. I looked at my hands, thinking and thinking. Even if it was only for a couple minutes, even if I only got to tell him I knew this big secret, I had to tell him something. I thought for a minute then exhaled sharply, realizing I had been holding my breath. "I know."

He stopped for a second, stiffening slightly and staring hard at a spot on the floor. He cleared his throat and his forehead creased slightly, "Know what?"

"You know what I'm talking about." It came out barely above a meek whisper. My heartbeat was thundering in my ears and I wondered if he could hear it. He slowly looked up at me, eyes wide. "And I told Brian that I know..."

His eyes widened and he opened his mouth to say something, but no words came out. His forehead creased more and he seemed lost and confused, even a little panicked. He opened his mouth again, and after a brief moment of nothing being said, he said in almost shock, "But... I'm still alive."

I nodded with a small smile. "You didn't tell me so the rule wasn't really broken. And he didn't really seem, like, mad but he definitely wasn't happy." I gave a small shrug.

He seemed skeptical but just stared at me. The skepticism faded, but a lot of emotion still remained. He looked at the floor for a minute then looked back at me. "Just so I know you know... What is it?"

I blinked and my eyes widened slightly. Even since it had been pointed out to me, I hadn't really said it for myself. I gulped, my throat was tight and it was a little hard to breathe. "Uhm... Er... You like me, as more than a friend?"

Zacky half smiled and chuckled, shaking his head as he looked at the ground again. "You sound unsure. If you knew, you'd be pretty sure about it. Especially if you're the Hazzard Gates I know." He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly and shook his head again. "You're right though. I wanted to tell you because I've liked you for a long time, but I never expected anything." He shrugged and looked at me. He chuckled awkwardly and ran a hand through his hair, "Perfect timing, huh? Just as Prince Charming decides to show up again."

He was more calm and collected that I had been anticipating. Not that I had expected him to be mad or anything, but this definitely not been what I was expecting. Then again, I hadn't really been expecting anything. "Are you mad?"

He looked at me like I was crazy as he shook his head. He looked at the floor again and sighed with a slight shrug. "Well, maybe a little. But it's not because of you. Just timing and Bri and all this shit." He sighed, running his hand through his hair again. He looked up as the guys came back into the room and my brother tossed him a beer.

I watched him try to compose himself again and he grinned, opening it and chugging a couple gulps. Nathan sat down beside me and offered a beer; I took it gratefully and took a long drinnk from it. "God, girls, you took forever." I mostly looked accusingly at my brother.

Brian shrugged with a smirk. "You know perfection takes time. Besides, it's called Seven Minutes In Heaven, not thirty seconds." He winked at Nathan, whom blew a kiss and winked in return. Brian laughed. "Love you, baby," he said, blowing a kiss back.

I rolled my eyes, chewing on my lip to hide the smile, and I looked at Zacky. He forced a laugh and shook his head, chugging more from his bottle. He looked at me and, before I could read his emotions, he was looking at the floor.

I didn't like Zacky the way he liked me, so why did I feel so bad?