A Far Cry From Innocence.

It had been two weeks since my fight with Nathan and I could barely feel anything. Nothing had gotten any better and it only seemed like things were getting worse. I hadn't seen Zacky since the tour ended and we barely spoke. It hurt but I couldn't say I hadn't expected it to some degree... Brian had told me that Zacky hadn't really talked to him much anymore either; only when he needed to at rehearsals and when they were writing.

"Are you okay?"

I looked up at Ryland as his bitter tone tore me from my thoughts. I looked back down at the cup of frozen yogurt and shrugged. "Yeah, I'm fine. Why?" Even I could hear how monotone I was and I knew I was far from convincing anyone, especially Ryland.

"I brought you here b'cause you love it. At least, you used to... But you haven't even touched your yogurt." He crossed his arms and raised a brow at, sitting back against the chair.

I stabbed at the melting heap with the plastic spoon, slowly putting a small scoop into my mouth. The bittersweet tang of key lime hit my taste buds, shocking them for a second. I shrugged again, "Just...not in the mood."

He smirked and threw a stale mini-marshmallow at me from his cup of yogurt, "I wonder how many times you've said that." He put his hands up defensively when I glared. There was a brief awkward pause and he finished what was in his cup. "So, what's bothering you?"

I sighed quietly and looked to the side, out the window. "Do you really have the time?" I glanced back at him, poking at my frozen yogurt again. I had so many things going through my head that it was hard to cope with...

"To listen to you whine?" He snickered to himself then nodded. "Hey, we're friends, right?" He laughed loudly at my skeptical expression. He threw his wadded up paper towel at me, "We're friends. So tell me. Stupid bitch." He forced a smile to show me he was just teasing and I found myself even more confused... He was never so friendly. "That's why I brought you out here."

I rolled my eyes and smiled a little, but it quickly faded. I sighed and propped my head up on my hand. "Nathan hasn't talked to me since we broke up... Zacky's barely spoken two words to me and he ignores all my calls and texts. My grades are slipping and it won't be long before Brian finds out and I get an ear full." I rubbed my temples and sighed again, continuing, "And I think the band is going to have to be put on hold for a while..." I hated having to say that, but I knew my dad would say the same as soon as he heard about my grades.

Ryland nodded slowly, listening to what I had to say. I knew he was struggling with it, never having to be sympathetic or have to deal with anyone's issues. He stood up and patted down his pockets. "Wanna go out for a smoke?" I nodded, throwing my cup of yogurt into the trash and following him out the door. He pulled took a cigarette from it's place behind his ear and lit it. "So, the band's on hold. Okay, gotta do what you gotta do, I get it." He leaned back against the wall and took a drag. "Nate obviously doesn't want to talk and it sounds like everything's done there, so stop worrying. I'll check on him in a couple days. What are you going to do about Zacky?" He looked at me.

I shrugged, taking my pack of cigarettes out of my pocket and pulling one out. I twisted it in my hands while I thoughts. "I don't really know... I think it's pretty obvious he doesn't want to talk to me either." I looked at him, waiting for a sarcastic reply as I lit my cigarette and put it between my lips.

He nodded and shrugged his shoulders lazily. "Well, I'm not sure I blame the guy. I mean, you finally find out he likes you, and Nate shows up. You kiss him and call it a drunk mistake. A guy can only get shot down so many times before he stops trying to fly." He smirked. We were quiet for a minute while I thought about what he said. It was a good point and I hadn't thought of it before. "But I think you should go over to his house and talk to him." I looked at him questioningly, a little surprised. Ryland shrugged, "Hey, it's obvious you care about him. What's the worst that could happen, he doesn't talk to you?"

"Ryland... I don't know. I mean, what do I say? It's not like I can just walk up and be like 'hey Zacky! Remember how I said kissing you was a drunk mistake? Yeah, well, I lied; I love you. I just said that 'cause Roni is a psychotic nutcase.'" I shook my head, taking a slow drag. I had a feeling that was why he wasn't talking to Brian either since he had pretty much given us both the cold shoulder since Brian basically attacked Roni. "No... that just wouldn't work."

He rolled his eyes and looked at me in almost annoyance. When I only stared back, he scoffed and shook his head. "That wouldn't work? God, Avigaiel, you're such a pussy!" He flicked the ash off his cigarette and shook his head to himself, muttering something under his breath. "Find, don't do it like that. Just go and talk to him, like you used to. You know: 'hey Zacky, how's it hangin'?' and all that other typical shit." He let the cigarette dangle between his lips while he pat down his pockets, pulling his keys out when he found them. "I'll even drop you off."

I pursed my lips and sighed, staring at the ground for a minute. It was probably smart to see how things settled with Zacky and talk to him. Maybe, eventually, I could tell him how I felt. Finally, I looked back at Ryland with a small smile, "Alright, let's go."

He smirked and nodded once, nudging me with his shoulder as he walked toward the parking lot. "Good girl. Are you sure you're up to it?" He raised a brow at me as we walked side by side back to his car, but I knew he wasn't really going to give me much of a choice.

I nodded at him with as much confidence as I could muster. It was a little scary knowing I was about to face him for the first real time since Brian had blown up at Roni, and I wasn't sure how he was going to react. I slid into the passenger seat and sighed.

Ryland eyed me after he slid into the driver's seat and laughed. "Calm down, Av. It's not a big deal." He started the car and pulled off to start toward Zacky's place.

I shook my head. It was a big deal; it could either be the end of my friendship with Zacky or the revival. It was terrifying to think of it being the end. "M-maybe I should call him or something to make sure he's home." I took my phone out a played with it nervously. Really, I was hoping he wasn't home and I could put it off.

"I thought he wasn't answering your calls or texts." Ryland didn't even take his eyes of the road and he sounded beyond bored now, sitting back in his seat and only one hand on the wheel. "What makes you think it'd be different thing time?" He looked at me for only a brief second before looking back to the road.

I sighed and reluctantly set my phone back in my lap. I knew no answer wouldn't be enough for Ryland to let me wimp out. He'd only let me out of it if I went up to the door and no one answered. Even then, I wouldn't doubt him making me sit and wait until Zacky got back. He really could be annoyingly stubborn.

The ride was silent but not uncomfortable. Ryland wasn't a big social guy, he didn't mind silence and not talking. I didn't mind him being quiet either since it meant he wasn't saying anything mean. We finally pulled up in front of Zacky's house and my heart jumped to my throat. "Ry, I don't think I can do this..." I looked at him and I was sure he could see the fear in my eyes.

He rolled his eyes and looked at me sternly. "Avigaiel Haner, put on you big girl pants and stop being such a fucking pussy. Get out of this car and go knock on the door right now." He stared at me, unamused and unrelenting.

I swallowed hard and nodded. I took a deep breath and got out of the car, taking slow strides up to the front door so I could try to pull myself together a little. I reluctantly knocked on the door and waited. It seemed like ages past but it couldn't have been more than a couple minutes before the door opened.

Zacky's face went from cheerful to dead surprised. "Oh, Avigaiel... Uh, hey." He looked at me for a while, like he hadn't seen me in years. "What're you doing here?"

I offered a weak, nervous smile. I cleared my throat and opened my mouth to say something but quickly snapped it shut, making my teeth clatter, when I saw something I thought was gone forever. I swallowed hard again as my heart sunk.