Never Not Over You

I couldn't stand it, Niall was being so possessive he wasn't giving me room to breathe. I started to find myself going to Jamie and hanging on their bus when Niall was asleep.
I really was beginning to hate myself for what I was doing.

"So Ariel, what are you going to tell your boyfriend?" Ryan asked with a ridiculous smile on his face as he opened the bus door "I don't even know can I just crash here for the drive? I really can't handle it today..." I said sadly looking at the ground "Yea, come on in." He scoffed standing back to let me on.

"Ariel !!!" The boys all shouted raising their plastic red cups "Hi." I sighed flopping down on the couch next to Jamie "what's wrong hun?" Jamie asked "nothing. Movie night?" I asked him with my sad puppy dog eyes "Okay, lets go to the back lounge." he smiled leading the way.
We knew it'd just be him and I in the back lounge that night so we set everything up and locked the door behind us.
"You know Ryan is going to want to join us later." Jamie said sitting down next to me "Quite possibly, I don't think I'd have a problem with it though seeing as what tomorrow is.." I trailed off things went silent I knew Jamie had forgotten, I didn't want to mention it any further so I just lay on the couch with my head on his lap.

* * * *
"Hey Harry have you seen Ariel?" I asked waking from my sleep "She left and said she'll meet us in the next place." Harry replied going back to texting.
What? Ariel isn't on the bus with us? that's not like her she would have told me. I couldn't seem to understand why she would just leave .
"Ok... I'm getting a beer." I sighed jumping out of my bunk. Was I mad that Ariel just disappeared without telling me.

* * * *
Knock, Knock
"Am I allowed to come in?" Ryan asked from behind the door, I gave Jamie a nod and he let him in "Whoa.... What's with miss doom and gloom over there." Ryan remarked "Shut up." I said trying not to smile, "Aww.... What's the matter?" Ryan asked falling onto the couch with me "nothing Ry..." I replied pulling the blanket to my face "Liar. I know what it is. come here." He pulled me up onto his lap giving me the biggest hug "Thanks Ry..." I whispered in his ear before collapsing in his arms "what are you doing? this isn't a sad movie! it's a happy movie c'mon." Ryan chuckled wiping my tears away.
* * * *
" Ariel.... Ryan? what the hell are you doing with-- she's asleep ? wh-what Put my girlfriend on the phone now !!" I was pissed I never thought Ariel would ever go back to him of all people, I just wanted to punch something, someone. Ryan I just wanted to beat his arse "Niall, whoa calm down. What's going on?" Louis asked running into the front lounge "Ask Ariel she could easily explain it to you." I scoffed downing my forth beer "I don't understand, where is she?" he asked looking around "exactly. She isn't here. Why ? because she's with Ryan haven't too much of a good time that's for sure." I replied smashing the bottle "Whoa, whoa... Niall Calm down. give me the bottle.." Louis said calmly taking the bottle from me before taking me down to the back lounge "Alright talk to you." Harry said closing the door while Louis sat me down.
"Ariel's cheated on me with Ryan.." I said bluntly "What? no. Are you sure Niall?" Louis asked "Yes I'm pretty sure she's with him right now!" I exclaimed "She may not be sleeping with him Niall, she wouldn't do that to you." Harry said "Yeah well you would be surprised as to what she could do." I scoffed grabbing another beer "Niall I don't think you should drink anymore, you will do something you'll regret." "like what Louis ? break up with Ariel? I should just do it now get it over and done with so she can go back to Ryan have his child again and play happy families while I live the bachelor lifestyle I've always wanted. I don't want to settle down especially with someone who's just going to cheat on me." I laughed pulling my phone out to ring Ariel when Louis snatched it and left.

* * * *

4:00am

I hadn't realized how much time had gone past and how fast I'd fallen asleep, I guess in this situation I really cried myself to sleep. I was surprised when I felt an arm around my waist and a hand rested on my stomach, I know it was Ryan but deep down I was hoping and praying it was Jamie. I heard the familiar grunts and moans and I could hear him waking up.

"Look my two favorite people haven't killed each other yet." I heard Jamie say walking into the back lounge "Fuck off Jamie...." Ryan yawned "Jamie please don't I'm not in the mood." I growled "Yeah you heard her Jamie." Ryan laughed leaning his head on me pressing his lips on my shoulder, sending me forward and of the couch in shock "what are you doing?" I breathed looking at Ryan "I'll leave you guys to it." Jamie backed away "I'm sorry Ariel I wasn't thinking." He defended himself running his fingers along my back "Ry... stop.." I sighed shaking my head "Don't put those walls up now. You're not right and I know." Ryan started "You talk in your sleep, and in this case you were crying. almost shouting and some more crying." He added after seeing the confused look on my face.
"4 years..." I muttered putting my head back on his shoulder "I know...I know." He replied wrapping his arms around me. It took me by surprise "I know what you need..." Ryan smiled getting up from behind me "What? a bad memory eraser?" I asked flopping down on the couch and checking my phone.

5 New Voice Messages: 10 Missed Calls: 13 New Messages: Niall x

this wasn't going to go well especially because he wasn't the only one who had texted I had messages from Harry, Louis and Eleanor. It's like he ran around the bus getting everyone to try get a hold of me.

Eleanor: Answer your phone now!! Niall is freaking out and is jumping to conclusions. Lou just called to say he's having a mental breakdown basically. CALL HIM.

"I have wine!!!" Ryan exclaimed quietly holding two bottles in his hands "I don't think I should..." I sighed pulling my knees to my chest "You need it, I also have mario kart so lets get playing." He insisted "Fine. But can we just watch a movie instead I'm not in the mood to play video games. I'll even let you have some wine and some blanket." I replied forcing a laugh "Deal." Ryan jumped next to me dimming the light to the back lounge "So what was it I was saying in my sleep?" I asked "It was quite muffled at times but I heard you calling my name a few times saying 'I'm sorry, I don't know what happened. They take her. I'm sorry I just want her back' then you started crying and almost screaming. Once I put my arm around you, you calmed down and asked me not to let go..." Ryan said I felt like an idiot when he mentioned it so I took a large mouthful of the wine he'd placed next to him.

* * * *

The bus rolled to a stop making a quick pit stop before Arizona, I knew the boys were in the bus ahead turns out the two buses had agreed to meet here.

I was smashed I knew that much as I stumbled off the bus with a quarter full bottle of wine in my hand "Ariel do you think you should be drinking anymore?" Ian asked running to get me "I'm not drinking because it's fun and I want to Ian. I'm drinking because I have to, gotta drown my sorrows somehow right." I scoffed taking a seat on the ground in between the buses "even still, I think you should just put the bottle down. You've had far too much. There are other ways to cope." He added "Ian please stop. Just leave me to sit here and wallow in self pity." I begged "You know I can't do that, C'mon." Ian shook his head in disapproval before throwing me over his shoulder "Ian put me down!!" I shouted hitting his back "I'm sorry I can't do that Ariel. I'm not letting you do something dumb."

This is why I liked Ian the most see if it were Nash he would just let me drink, probably join me then talk me into something stupid whereas Ian stops me from doing something I know I would probably regret. "I'm not even going to try." I sighed finishing off the bottle.

Next stop Arizona.