Downfall

Ryan threw the door open of the building that he worked in, he desperately needed a cigarette break. He currently worked for a publishing company as an editor, and at times the job could be more than stressful. With a sigh, he stepped over to the little park that resided beside the building- he would always go here when he wanted to be alone. He sat down and lifted his hips to grab the pack from his back pocket, he couldn't lie- he was addicted to these things. His hands shaky from the never ending hours- he pulled a cigarette out and put it on the edge of his lips. After lighting it, he inhaled deeply, eyes closed as the nicotine went through his body. The smoke escaped from his nostrils, leaving a smell that he learned to love. He took another hit, eyes still closed to the world, and so he didn't notice someone was standing in front of him until they made their presence known.

"You know smoking can kill you?" A feminine voice broke out the blissful silence that surrounded the park.

Ryan opened his eyes, and looked at the woman in her scrubs, and beautiful blonde hair. He couldn't help but be irritable. "I'm aware of that."

"Then why do you do it?"

"Okay, I don't exactly appreciate people coming up to me and giving me a health class on the effects of smoking. I don't need to explain myself to you, what I do is my business." He had to admit the woman was gorgeous, but he was also not in a good mood, and so no matter what the person looked like- he wasn't going to be the nice guy.

"I'm a nurse, your health is exactly my business. Its what I do." God, this woman was getting on his nerves.

"If I were under your care, my health would be your concern- but I'm not, so can you leave me alone?" He sucked on the cigarette, by god he was going to enjoy his break.

The woman scrunched her nose up in disgust as the smoke rose to meet her, "Did you also know that your teeth can fall out from that stuff?"

Ryan groaned, "Look lady, I know all of the side effects of smoking- but I don't give a shit, I have a stressful job and this helps me calm down."

She laughed, "I'm sure whatever you do is nothing compared to my line of a job, do you see me smoking to help with the stress of it?"

He wanted to punch something at this point, what was her deal, and where the fuck did she come from? "You have no idea what my job even is." He shook his head, "I don't even know why I'm still talking to you."

Ryan picked himself up and brushed past her, inhaling her scent on the way- which was undeniably sweet. He found himself breathing in a second time, it was addictive to say the least. Then he realized she had been harassing him, and quickened his pace.

"I wasn't done talking to you, you know." She called out from behind.

He raised his hand, not looking back. "I'm done talking to you, though." He ran the way back to his building, and stuffed out his cigarette on the ground. He pulled on the door, and entered inside- shivering a little as the cool air hit him in the face.

"Gosling!" Someone called out, and Ryan cursed under his breath. He was hoping to go back to his office in peace.

He turned around, and faced one of his many coworkers. "Yeah, Brian?"

"The boss wants to see you."

Ryan cursed again, a double whammy. Whenever the boss wanted to see him was when he wanted to give him another deadline on a book- ontop of the other work that was required of him to finish.

He nodded, and headed his way to the bosses office. He stood outside the door, and straightened his suit out before knocking.

"Come in." His boss roughly said.

Ryan opened the door, and slipped inside. "You wanted me?"

The boss didn't bother replying, instead motioned with his hands for him to sit down- he obeyed and looked around the room- despite him being in here plenty of times.

"Gosling, I need for you to take on this project for me." He pushed a heavy set of papers towards him- Ryan stared at it in disbelief.

"Boss, I'm still working on that book for you- plus I'm taking on a bunch of other short stories. I can't do it right now." He knew right away he said the wrong thing.

The boss looked at him dead in the eye, "Do you like your job, Gosling?"

He stuttered, trying to find the right words to say. "I-I do, sir."

"Then you will shut your mouth and be grateful that you even have a job. I can kick you out of this place in a snap, do you hear me?"

Ryan gaped at him, it was the first time that he was rendered speechless. He was usually a confident person, often outspoken- but in front of his boss he was turned into this reserved person.

"I want this done by the end of the month, now get out of here before I change my mind and decide to fire your ass."

He didn't bother further arguing with him, instead he nodded and picked up the what he thought was another novel. Without looking back, he left his office and went inside his own.

"Fuck me." He mumbled, letting the stack of papers fall on top of his desk with a loud thump. He lifted a hand and roughly brushed the back of his dirty blonde hair, it was going to be a long fucking night.

He was on the eighty eighth page, when he couldn't take it anymore. He lifted his head, and groaned when it cracked, he risked looking at his watch- it read 3 am. "God dammit." He cursed, letting his head fall onto the desk. He had been working on the now decided textbook for eight hours straight, and didn't even include when he first got there the previous morning

Ryan marked his place, and shut the book closed. He was going home, where he would only get four hours of sleep before he would have to get up again to go to work. He lifted himself off the chair, and grabbed his jacket, slinging it on, and turning off the lights on his way out.

It was half dark, and half light when he entered the dimly lit hallway, some were still in their offices- others had gone for the night. He nodded to a few remaining people, and left the building.

Ryan sighed, and looked up at the starry night sky, inhaling the sweet cool air. It was time for a cigarette, and by god, did he deserve it. The girl that he met earlier was far from his mind when he entered the park.

His bones creaked as he settled himself on the concrete bench. "Ugh." He groaned, "Getting old." He mumbled as he took out the pack, putting one in his mouth. His handy lighter there to light up both his hands, and the cigarette. He positively moaned at the desperately needed nicotine, he was going to pull a two tonight.

Ryan surveyed the park around him, enjoying the silence, and the chirps of the many insects that came out at night. He could see a couple on the far right, sucking on each others tongues. It kind of reminded him of his ex girlfriend- Rachel, and how they would be doing the same thing. He closed his eyes in pain- the girl broke his fucking heart. He was going to ask her to marry him, they had been going on straight since their high school days. Then she cheated on him, and told him straight to his face the very next day. Needless to say- he still missed her.

"Still going at it?" That familiar voice broke his thoughts.

Ryan glared at her through the slit of his eyes, "Do you stalk this park or something? Ranting on about your smoking kills to sitting bystanders?" He spat.

"I work at the hospital over there, thank you very much." She pointed behind her.

"Good, you can go back there now."

"You don't need to be an ass."

Ryan could see that he insulted her in some way, but in his state of mind- he could careless. He mocked her instead of apologizing.

"I hope you get cancer from all that smoking you do." Was all she said before she stalked off.

He wasn't about to let her go, that statement hit him more than she probably realized. His long legs met with her much shorter ones. "Hey, where do you get off insulting me like that?" He grabbed her arm.

She snatched her arm away and twirled to meet his eyes, "When you decided to be a dick."

"I had a horrible fucking day at work, okay? I wanted to relax, I didn't come here to get hassled by a beautiful girl." He was telling the truth in that regard.

She snorted, "I'm all but beautiful."

"What's your name?" He titled his head when she raised her eyebrow, "C'mon, you owe me." He added.

"Michelle."

Ryan smiled, "That's a pretty name."

She laughed, "What's yours?"

"Ryan." He extended his hand, and she took it, relishing her soft hand in his.

Michelle turned his hand, and observed the roughness of his skin. "Do you play guitar?"

He nodded, "Yeah."

"Sing?" She asked, giving him a slight smile.

"That too, I can also play the piano."

Michelle shook her head, "Is there anything you can't do?"

He laughed, looking up at the sky. "Uh, I can't dance. I really suck at it."

"Let me teach you sometime."

"I'll take you up on that offer."

"I have to go, I'll see you later?"

Ryan nodded, too afraid suddenly to ask for her number, "Yeah, definitely. You aren't that bad, you know?"

Michelle let out a small laugh, "You aren't either." She gave him one last look before she walked past him, and down the street. He followed her, until she was a tiny speck among the traffic.

He looked at his watch, and cursed at the time: 4 am. He already decided he wasn't going into work, he was sure his boss wouldn't mind- as he could work perfectly at home too. With that thought in mind, he headed for the bus.

His own mind was filled with the sudden change of attitude between Michelle and him, he couldn't lie and say he wasn't glad that they made up. There had to be a reason why he felt so elated around her, and for him to realize that after treating her like a piece of garage made him want to punch his past self.

Ryan vowed to keep her in his life.