The Reason

I sat down here , as I just look into my notebook . I know I was so evil do this to her , I know that the way I feel with her .

my head hurt when I had to think about this , I love her , but the astrocytoma was come so fast before I can tell her the truth .

I feel no hope anymore to continue my life , although I didn't want to die , there is so much thing that I want to do , I want to be Astronout in NASA , and I still want to kiss my girlfriend , I still want to be a husband for my wife and father for my childern , but I know there's only 14 days before my surgical for remove the tumor , I didn't know if this work or not but if it's not , the letter would say the truth .

Ally was the first one , the first I love , the first I miss , and the first for me to had this feeling , but now she's gonna be the last stand on me , she is gonna be the last I love before I die , besides she have to believe about my soul would always be with her when I'm gone , But I still didn't want to leave her .

I look up at the sky , I know I should be around her and watch her right now but I can't , I should say I love her last night but I can't , I'm afraid too hurt her , and I know she would be really worried now because I'm not there , I feel really guilty .

I look back at my notebook and start to write , there's so much a quote of me for Ally , she even didn't know it , everyone too .

" Dear God ..
Please take care of my soulmate when I'm not around her to
hold her , tell her , I Love Her ... "

I can see my tears falling down to the paper , I really miss her right now , I wish I could hold her for one more time but I can't .