Breakout

Chapter 14.

Lisa's words haunted through my mind all afternoon. Alex got off the phone and we sat there and talked the whole time. I couldn't help but think what happened between Lisa and Alex. Of course I'm not going to jump to conclusions, that would be rude. As it reached four in the afternoon, we both decided to head home. Alex offered a ride but I just wanted to walk. Just to keep my mind off things. As I was walking, I couldn't help but feel like I was hogging Alex. I don't remember the last time Alex hung out with Rian, Zack or Jack. I feel like I'm keeping them away from each other. I think for the next couple of days I'm just going to stay away from Alex so he can spend time with the guys. I also couldn't help but think that the guys knew what had happened to Alex. I mean, of course they knew what happened. Every time I try to talk to them about it they all simply said, "You just gotta be patient." Well, I'm tired of being patient. I'm tired of waiting. Alex and I are close enough friends for him to tell me stuff. I told him what happened to me and he said he'll tell me his story. But he hasn't. Did something really bad happen? Like did he rob a bank or something? Did he cheat on his Math test? I don't know. But most importantly, is it going to mess up our friendship? Once he tells me, will he ever talk to me again? Will ever look at me again? While all these thoughts were circling my mind, I didn't notice a person walking next to me. I turned my head towards the figure and instantly recognized it as Zack.

"I saw you walking alone out here by yourself, you look like something was bothering you," his eyes met mine as he talked. That was the first time I heard Zack actually talk a full sentence. I like his voice, it's soothing.

"Um, yeah. Something is bothering me," I answered. Zack nodded but didn't say anything in return. "You're not going to ask what's bothering me?"

Zack shook his head. "No, if you don't want to tell me, I understand. I'm not going to pressure you into something that you don't want to talk about."

I let his words sink into my brain. Wow, he had a point. I never knew someone so quiet could actually say those kind of words. It was beyond me.

"Do you want to know what's bothering me?" I asked. Zack shrugged.

"Yeah, if you want to tell me. Like I said, I'm not going to pressure you into anything."

"Well, what was bothering me was Alex and what he's not telling me."

"What's Alex not telling you?"

"Everything! What happened between him and Jasey, what happened between him and Lisa and most importantly, what Lullabies is about."

"Listen Marie. Alex has been through a tough time these past six years. Alex is afraid of letting people in. He's afraid if he let's people in and know his story, he'll lose them."

I furrowed my eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

"Have you ever kept secrets from your friends?" Zack asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Alex is afraid if anyone keeps secrets from him. He'll lose them."

I tried progressing that in my mind but I still couldn't understand what he was trying to say. As if Zack was reading my mind, he chuckled.

"Don't worry, you'll understand soon."

I furrowed my eyebrows again and Zack laughed at me.

"Hey, it's not funny!" I giggled. "I'm seriously confused right now!"

Zack continued to laugh at me. "Wanna chill at the park?"

I laughed along with him sure. Zack's laughter died down as he and I started walking toward the park. We both sat on the ground by the swings.

"This is the same park where we shoot a photoshoot for out first album," Zack explained.

"Really?" I asked.

"Yep, see those monkey bars over there?" He pointed towards the yellow monkey bars. "That's where we shoot a photo. And we shoot one near their school."

"That's so cool."

Zack smiled and took his phone. "Look," there was a picture of all the guys around the monkey bars. Jack and Zack were hanging from them while Alex and Rian were on the ground but their hands were up, wrapped around the monkey bars. I laughed.

"You guys are hilarious," I said.

"Yeah, Alex and Jack love to misbehave at times. Rian and I are the mature ones," he said.

"I can tell you're all really close."

A smile crept on Zack's face. "Very. They're all like my brothers."

"You know I actually never seen you guys play live like in front of an audience before," I said.

"Well, you should come see us sometime. We're not that bad."

I laughed. "Alex wants me to come on your guys' spring tour but I can't."

"Why not?"

"I have this chess competition."

"You play chess?"

"Yeah since I was six, I don't know what made me drawn to it. I always thought it would be cool to play chess."

Zack smiled. "I would love to see you play."

A blush crept it's way onto my skin. Weird, I only thought I blushed around Alex. It feels so strange now.

"Can you play any instruments?" Zack asked. I nodded.

"I can play piano and guitar."

"I can play guitar too. And I play the bass."

I smiled. Zack and I sat there in silence. I yawned, which made my tshirt come up a bit, showing my stomach.

"What's that on your stomach?" Zack asked. I instantly pulled my shirt down.

"What thing?"

"There was something on your stomach. Something purple."

My eyes widened. What if he saw the bruises?

"Nothing. That was nothing."

Zack inched toward me. "Marie."

I gulped as tears filled my eyes. I lifted up my shirt which revealed the purple bruises and cuts.

"What happened?" Zack whispered.

"I fell of my bike," I lied. Zack continued to stare at me, clearly not believing me.

"Fine," I took a deep breath. "My father abuses me."

"Why?"

"Ever since him and my mom got a divorce, he's beat me," I said while tears started spilling from my eyes. I put down my shirt when Zack hugged me. I cried on his shoulder. He rubbed my back soothingly.

"Does anyone know about this?" he asked.

"Only Alex."

"Not your mom?"

"Well, yeah she knows but non-family, only Alex."

"Don't worry, I'll keep your secret with me, I promise," Zack whispered.

"Thanks Zack," I lifted my head up to meet his eyes. "I means a lot."

---

Ever since that day at the park, Zack and I have gotten closer. But not as close as Alex and I. As I said, I gave Alex some time with the guys. I hung out with Samantha most of the time. It's been a week since Zack found about the abuse. I trusted him not to tell anyone. I mean he's quiet. It was Monday and I decided to hang out at Zack's house after school. Carla, Zack's mom, whom I met is super nice. Zack's dad wasn't around since he had work. Carla made some cookies for Zack and I. I wanted to eat the cookies plain but Zack wanted to put ketchup on his. I stared at Zack as he squeezed a bottle of ketchup on his sugar cookie. I wrinkled my nose.

"Ew, I can't believe you're putting ketchup on that," I said as he bit into his cookie. I literally was about to puke.

"It's delicious!" He said. I bit into my non-ketchup cookie.

"You're sick."

"Nah, but do you want to try some?" Zack thrusted the ketchup bottle at me. I pushed it away.

"No thanks," I said. Zack opened the lid to the ketchup bottle and tried squirting ketchup on my cookie. "No!" I started running around the kitchen as Zack was trying to put ketchup on my cookie. I ran to the fridge and grabbed another ketchup bottle. I opened the lid and pointed straight as Zack and squeezed. Ketchup now filled the front of Zack's shirt. I laughed at his expression. Utterly confused but mad. Zack squeezed his bottle of ketchup at me, smearing it all over my face. Now Zack laughed as I wiped ketch from my eyes. And the war was on. For the next five minutes are so, Zack and I had a ketchup war. Both of us spraying ketchup on each other.

"What's going on in here?!" A voice called out. Zack and I dropped our ketchup bottles on the kitchen floor as we started at Zack's mom. Her face read anger as she took upon a scene in the kitchen. Behind her was a surprised looking Alex.

"Alex, what are you doing here?" Zack asked, ignoring his mom.

"I came here to find out where you were, we have band practice today," Alex said, his eyes shifting over to me.

"You'll go to band practice later but right now, Zack and Marie clean up this mess right now!" Carla demanded.

"Mom, don't make Marie clean up the mess, I will."

"Zack," I began but he cut me off.

"You can borrow some of my sister's clothes. Her room is upstairs on the right."

I stared at Zack, not wanting him to clean up this mess by himself, but I'm obeyed. I headed upstairs in Zack's sister's room. Her door was closed so I knocked on it. Suddenly, the door opened and it revealed who I was guessing was Zack's sister.

"Hi," she spoke. "You're Marie right?"

"Yeah, is it okay if I borrow some of your clothes? Zack and I got into a little mess."

She laughed. "Sure, come in."

She opened the door further as I walked into her room. Her room was a light pink but with blink-182 posters covering up her walls. Does everyone in Baltimore like blink-182?

"I'm Sam," the girl said.

"You already know who I am," I said.

Sam giggled. "Yeah, well looks like your pants are fine. Here," she started going through her piles of clothes in her drawer. She lifted up a black tshirt that read 'Role Model'. "It's a Simple Plan tshirt. Do you know who they are?"

"Nope," I said.

"You're missing out. They're a great band."

I smiled. "Where can I change?"

"In there," Sam pointed to the bathroom in her room.

"Thanks." I walked over to it and closed the door. I slipped off my ketchup stained tshirt and slipped on the Role Model one. It was a little big on me but I liked it. I walked out the bathroom and found Sam watching tv. Her eyes traveled over to me.

"You look great!" She said.

"Thanks," I said.

"You're welcome. And come by anytime you like. Zack's probably going to look forward to it." She winked. I blushed but quickly covered it up with my hair. Sam noticed and laughed.

"Well I have to go now," I said. "See you later."

"Bye Marie!"

I walked out of her room and down the stairs into the living room. Alex was still there watching Zack clean up the mess in the kitchen.

"You coming to band practice with us?" Alex asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Cool, let's go." Alex started walking out of the living room but I stopped him.

"What about Zack?" I asked.

"He'll come soon."

Alex and I both walked out of Zack's house. Alex's car was in the driveway and we both got in. Alex drove away from Zack's house.

"So, you and Zack are friends now," he said.

"We've always been friends."

"No I mean, you're actually friends. He actually talks to you."

"Yeah, I know. Honestly, I never know Zack could talk."

Alex chuckled. "Yeah, he's quiet once you first meet him but he'll warm up to you."

I smiled. Rian's house wasn't that far away from Zack's. Just a few minutes away.

"Do you like him?" Alex asked.

"What?" I said.

"Do you like Zack?"

I hesitated before answering. "Yeah."

"No I mean, more than a friend."

Liking Zack as more than a friend seemed bizarre to me. He's the type of guy I would love to be friends with all my life. He's the one that would always be there for me.

"No, just a friend. Besides I like someone else," My eyes widened. Did I really just say that? That's basically like telling him I like Alex. Alex smiled.

"Who do you like?" he asked.

"No one."

"But you just said you liked someone."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"Marie."

"Alex."

"Who do you like?"

"Why do you care?"

"I don't."

I studied him. His eyes looked curious. But little did he know I was talking about him.

"At least what does he look like?" Alex asked.

"A person," I said. Alex laughed.

"I feel like you're not going to tell me."

I shook my head. "Nope."

I don't know when I was going to tell Alex I liked him, I'm probably never going to tell him I liked him. I mean he's Alex Gaskarth. One of the popular guys in school. He's in a band that's really good and he basically has or will have girls drool over him. He's a good looking guy. I couldn't help but think when All Time Low get big, they'll forget all about the ones back home. They'll be touring all over the world, meeting tons of fans, getting to try new experiences. They'll easily forget about the city of Baltimore. But I couldn't help but feel like they'll forget about me.

"What are you thinking about?" Alex questioned, breaking my thoughts.

"Nothing," I lied. Alex nodded and within the next minute or two we were at Rian's house.