Lifeline
Lifeline
Sweaty palms, fluttering eyes, pounding head and heart. I sat- distressed at the situation that was now laid out in front me- unbendable in my creaky computer chair while my insides churned flaccidly like looped roller coasters and shaky, unbalanced teeter totters . This really was reality at it's brutal worst and to my misfortune I was chosen to be a part of it's teasing games. My mind played speeding car races, levels filled with dangerous curves, and I tried to make myself stop thinking. I spun my chair around to face the computer screen. I flicked the mouse, and the screen cast a dim light that lit up my face, despite my dull mood.
The computer dawned the time. 2:07 a.m.. I logged on to Myspace in a hurry, hoping to catch the one person I know I could talk to about what was happening. Much to my luck and dismay, she was online. Nicole. She'd been my best friend since kindergarten, and she was one of the few people who could fully stand my spells of reticence and sometimes just plain shyness. But now, as I messaged her about my emergency, all the worries and things that I'd been feeling all felt silly to me now. The roller coasters slowed to a screeching, bodily jerk while the twists and bends in the road flat lined into smooth country lanes. All was well for those few seconds whilst I waited for her to reply.
What?! Your sister was in a car crash? Her words were short and urgent. With shaky fingers, I somehow managed to type a confirmation. Yeah. My parents went to the hospital, but they told me to stay here. My mom told me it wasn't too bad, but I don't know if she was just saying that to calm me down. I just really need someone to talk to. I pressed 'Send' and waited, picturing Nicole's full, round face squinting at her computer screen as she read my first message. I pictured her eyebrows squishing together, just like they did when we shared intimate, touchy secrets with one another.
Let me call you, she wrote back. When I felt the soft vibration of my phone in the pocket of my sweat shirt, I fished it out, flipping it open in a nanosecond and pressing it to my ear.
“Hey.”
“Hey Brittany. So, are you okay? Is your sister okay?! You don't have to tell me everything, only the things you want to.” Nicole talked fast, almost mumbling her words as she asked me questions. It was something she'd always done when she became nervous or attempted to really dig to the bottom of things. Naturally, I picked the latter of the two as there was rarely a time when Nicole Fay became nervous or intimidated under pressure.
“I'm fine,” I replied, though I wasn't too sure if that was really the truth. “I really haven't heard from my parents in a while... I hope my sister is okay.”
“Jeez, Brittany. I'm so sorry this is happening to you.” Nicole's calm voice was soothing to me. “Do you want to hang up so your parents can get a hold of you right away? Then you could call me after you hear from them. I'll stay up late- you know I don't mind.” And she didn't. Nicole was the kind of person that always meant the things she said, which was a quality rarely found these days.
“Thanks, Nic. But you don't have to stay up. I'll just call you tomorrow, or text you later.”
There was a silence between us and all I could hear was the slight static in the phone. I still wasn't exactly sure or fully aware of what was happening, even though I could remember a few things: my mom shaking me and turning on all the lights in my room, my shaking hands as she told me what had happened while her glassy eyes threatened to spill down her sun browned cheeks. This silence was actually peaceful. It was calming. It was exactly the thing I needed at such a stressful time and, without it even phasing her, Nicole had once again thrown out the buoy that had helped me so many times previous.
“Okay then, I'll probably still be up for a while, though. Call me if you need me, Britt. Bye.”
“Bye.” I pressed the end button on my phone and set it down on the desk with a loud thunk. I ran cold, shaky hand through my knotted bed-head and stood up, walking across the living room to sit on the sofa in hopes of falling asleep to forget about this. All this. While my eyes were closed I tried hard not to think about what the accident must have been like. It was a nightmare to picture my sister- cemented to a stretcher, her face a twisted shade of purple as the flashing lights of ambulances, fire trucks, police cars surrounded her and the other people. I tried not to picture her boyfriend's expression when the police called him; his big cobalt eyes darkening to an indigo like they do when he's angry or frustrated. But most of all, I tried not to picture that hospital room with my sister sunk into the sterile white bed, her small frame sinking into the thin mattress. I couldn't picture her hooked up to IV's and monitors.
I jumped when I heard a knock at the front door.
“Who is it?” I asked, walking to the front door. I searched through the peep whole, but it was too dark outside to see anything.
“Just open the door.”
“Nicole?!” I practically sprinted the rest of the way to the door and swung it open, excited and confused that she was standing in the threshold of my house at this hour. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to see you, duh.” she smirked. I started to say something, but was once again interrupted my the vibrating of my phone.
“Mom?”
“Brittany? I just wanted to tell you, first of all, that your sister is gonna be fine...” I didn't even hear the rest. I didn't care. All I knew was that my sister was going to be okay, and I smiled. Despite everything, I smiled. Nicole saw me and smiled, too.
“I knew she was gonna be okay. I prayed for her.” Nicole's voice was quiet, but positive. I looked at her. She was still smiling. I walked to her, putting out my arms for a hug I knew I needed. Nicole knew it as well, and she reached me before I took my second step towards her.
In a funny way, it's those two steps she took that helped me overcome one of the biggest challenges in my life. The messages she sent me were calming, but the phone call was really something special. However, the unexpected knock on my door at 3 a.m. made the call seem like an ant hill on a vacant planet. Nicole didn't just take one step to meet me half way; she didn't just throw a lifeline out into an open ocean, hoping that I'd catch it. No. She took that extra step and handed it to me personally. It was something I'd gladly receive with open arms.
The computer dawned the time. 2:07 a.m.. I logged on to Myspace in a hurry, hoping to catch the one person I know I could talk to about what was happening. Much to my luck and dismay, she was online. Nicole. She'd been my best friend since kindergarten, and she was one of the few people who could fully stand my spells of reticence and sometimes just plain shyness. But now, as I messaged her about my emergency, all the worries and things that I'd been feeling all felt silly to me now. The roller coasters slowed to a screeching, bodily jerk while the twists and bends in the road flat lined into smooth country lanes. All was well for those few seconds whilst I waited for her to reply.
What?! Your sister was in a car crash? Her words were short and urgent. With shaky fingers, I somehow managed to type a confirmation. Yeah. My parents went to the hospital, but they told me to stay here. My mom told me it wasn't too bad, but I don't know if she was just saying that to calm me down. I just really need someone to talk to. I pressed 'Send' and waited, picturing Nicole's full, round face squinting at her computer screen as she read my first message. I pictured her eyebrows squishing together, just like they did when we shared intimate, touchy secrets with one another.
Let me call you, she wrote back. When I felt the soft vibration of my phone in the pocket of my sweat shirt, I fished it out, flipping it open in a nanosecond and pressing it to my ear.
“Hey.”
“Hey Brittany. So, are you okay? Is your sister okay?! You don't have to tell me everything, only the things you want to.” Nicole talked fast, almost mumbling her words as she asked me questions. It was something she'd always done when she became nervous or attempted to really dig to the bottom of things. Naturally, I picked the latter of the two as there was rarely a time when Nicole Fay became nervous or intimidated under pressure.
“I'm fine,” I replied, though I wasn't too sure if that was really the truth. “I really haven't heard from my parents in a while... I hope my sister is okay.”
“Jeez, Brittany. I'm so sorry this is happening to you.” Nicole's calm voice was soothing to me. “Do you want to hang up so your parents can get a hold of you right away? Then you could call me after you hear from them. I'll stay up late- you know I don't mind.” And she didn't. Nicole was the kind of person that always meant the things she said, which was a quality rarely found these days.
“Thanks, Nic. But you don't have to stay up. I'll just call you tomorrow, or text you later.”
There was a silence between us and all I could hear was the slight static in the phone. I still wasn't exactly sure or fully aware of what was happening, even though I could remember a few things: my mom shaking me and turning on all the lights in my room, my shaking hands as she told me what had happened while her glassy eyes threatened to spill down her sun browned cheeks. This silence was actually peaceful. It was calming. It was exactly the thing I needed at such a stressful time and, without it even phasing her, Nicole had once again thrown out the buoy that had helped me so many times previous.
“Okay then, I'll probably still be up for a while, though. Call me if you need me, Britt. Bye.”
“Bye.” I pressed the end button on my phone and set it down on the desk with a loud thunk. I ran cold, shaky hand through my knotted bed-head and stood up, walking across the living room to sit on the sofa in hopes of falling asleep to forget about this. All this. While my eyes were closed I tried hard not to think about what the accident must have been like. It was a nightmare to picture my sister- cemented to a stretcher, her face a twisted shade of purple as the flashing lights of ambulances, fire trucks, police cars surrounded her and the other people. I tried not to picture her boyfriend's expression when the police called him; his big cobalt eyes darkening to an indigo like they do when he's angry or frustrated. But most of all, I tried not to picture that hospital room with my sister sunk into the sterile white bed, her small frame sinking into the thin mattress. I couldn't picture her hooked up to IV's and monitors.
I jumped when I heard a knock at the front door.
“Who is it?” I asked, walking to the front door. I searched through the peep whole, but it was too dark outside to see anything.
“Just open the door.”
“Nicole?!” I practically sprinted the rest of the way to the door and swung it open, excited and confused that she was standing in the threshold of my house at this hour. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to see you, duh.” she smirked. I started to say something, but was once again interrupted my the vibrating of my phone.
“Mom?”
“Brittany? I just wanted to tell you, first of all, that your sister is gonna be fine...” I didn't even hear the rest. I didn't care. All I knew was that my sister was going to be okay, and I smiled. Despite everything, I smiled. Nicole saw me and smiled, too.
“I knew she was gonna be okay. I prayed for her.” Nicole's voice was quiet, but positive. I looked at her. She was still smiling. I walked to her, putting out my arms for a hug I knew I needed. Nicole knew it as well, and she reached me before I took my second step towards her.
In a funny way, it's those two steps she took that helped me overcome one of the biggest challenges in my life. The messages she sent me were calming, but the phone call was really something special. However, the unexpected knock on my door at 3 a.m. made the call seem like an ant hill on a vacant planet. Nicole didn't just take one step to meet me half way; she didn't just throw a lifeline out into an open ocean, hoping that I'd catch it. No. She took that extra step and handed it to me personally. It was something I'd gladly receive with open arms.
♠ ♠ ♠
[: Criticism would be greatly appreciated.Especially on this.