These Secrets Are Killing Me

"I know that Jesse, but who else is going to save their lives?" I yelled back.

"Family, friends, consolers, some other band. I don't Dad! I just need my Father at home. Not out touring, or trying to save people's live!" She yelled back. The tears running down her face, her hair fell in front of her face as she looked down at the bed. I reached out to touch her but she flinched away and got up from the bed, walking over to the smallest corner in the cell. I sat on the bed and wiped my own tears away.

"Jesse I'm sorry. OK I'm sorry, what more can I tell you?"

"That you'll stay at home, and take care of me and Mom. That you'll never leave us again and be there for us. That you'll love us forever and never stop loving us." She said, sliding down against the wall. She pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her head against them. Her voice was nothing more than just a whisper, it was so light I had to strain to hear her. I got up from the bed and walked over to her, trying my best to keep all my tears inside. Pulling her into a hug she pushed me back and backed further into the wall.

"Perché devo competere per la vostra attenzione? Perché dovrei essere in difficoltà, o morire per essere di preavviso di me? Il vostro Padre mio avviso si dovrebbe me non importa cosa. Sono stanco di lottare per la vostra attenzione, i tifosi si desidera. Essi possono hai fatto sto lottando per voi." I let my tears fall and a sob escape from my moth. She was right, she was fucking right. I couldn't believe I was making my own daughter compete for my attention. I can't believe that it took all of this for me to finally realize that.

"Jesse I'm so-" I didn't even get to finish before she cut me off.

"Don't, just leave." I got up from the floor and walked out of the cell, the cop right behind me. We walked to the front of the building, he went behind his desk and went right to his computer.

"Her court date is two weeks away, she will have to stay here. I'm sorry sir." I just nodded my head, and walked out of the building. I got in to Jenni's car and grabbed my phone, the tears falling out of my eyes like a waterfall. I sniffled into the phone as I waited for them to answer their phone. When they didn't answer the phone I threw my on the floor and drove off. The tears were blinding my vision, but I didn't care.

===*===

Pulling into the parking lot of the practice space, I noticed that everyone was outside. Awaiting my return with Jesse, but they didn't know that Jesse wasn't with me. I turned off the car and got out. Throwing the keys at Jenni as she ran over to me, I walked right past Steve. Right past Lyn and past Krystle, and straight to Jimmy.

"I should deck you in your fucking face right now. You knew damn well Jesse didn't have her drivers license, Lindsey fucking told you. I don't know what the fuck made you think that my daughter was old enough to be driving, and in New York! Are you fucking stupid?! Has all the weed you smoked fuck with your brain?! And then you fucking throw weed at the cop, what the hell were you thinking? Of course he would search the car if some idiot threw weed at him. Now my daughter is sitting in jail with no bail, and I had to hear it from her mouth... that I'm such a horrible Father that I don't even recognize when she needs my help. I'm such a horrible Father that I didn't even know that my daughter relapsed." I said, the tears that had dried up were now forming in my eyes again.

"I'm sorry Gerard. I didn't expect us to get pulled over, I wasn't thinking." He said.

"Where's Jesse?" Lindsey asked.

"At the jail. She has to stay there till she goes to court."

"And whens that?"

"In two goddamn weeks!" I yelled, storming off into the practice space.

===*===
Two Weeks Later

We pulled into the court parking lot, and I took a minute to compose myself. Getting out of the car I straightened out my suit and tie, fixing my hair. Lindsey was next, she got of the car fixing her black skirt and white blouse. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail, her bangs falling in front of her face. Frank and everyone was already here, including my parents.

We were five minutes late but that was my fault. I didn't want to come here and see my daughter get thrown in jail. Lindsey convinced me that this would be good for us. It would show Jesse that she means more to me, than what she knows or thinks. Walking into the court was the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

We walked into the court room and saw Mikey and my parents sitting down. We made our way into the the court room, just in time to hear the bailiff say for us to stand up. We did as we were told and noticed that there wasn't many people here, I thanked God. It was just Frank, Jamia,Ray,Christi, Mikey, Alicia, Mom, Dad and Lindsey and I.

And some other people that I didn't know, or care to know. The judge walked out of the room and sat down, the bailiff brought out the inmates. I heard my Mom gasp when she saw Jesse walk out with the shackles and cuffs. The bruise she had gotten was slowly fading but visible to the eye. Her lip was some what swollen, which made me wounder did she get into an other fight?

"Jessica Way." The judge said. Jesse stood up and walked over to the judge's table.

"You have some major charges here young lady. A felony for holding a nartioc substance, and misdemeanor for driving without a license. It says here you got into two fights during your stay. Care to tell me why?"

"I'm tired of people assuming all I do is sleep with people, and assume that I always get my way. Well you know what I'm not some whore, and I don't get what I want. I'm just like ever other kid, I make mistakes but I do learn from them. Do I feel bad for getting into those fights? No." Jesse said.

"I'm ordering you to a rehab facility to recover, you will also be placed on probation for three years. Take care of yourself and I don't want to see you back here again." He said. Jesse walked away from the Judge, and walked into the back of the room.

"Well what now?" My Mom asked.

"We take her to the rehab clinic I guess." I said.

"Are the parents of Jessica Way here?" The Judge asked. Me and Lindsey raised our hands and stood up.

"There will be no need to take her to rehab clinic, I'll be sending her to the rehab clinic immediately. It's in Main, it's the best of it's kind."

"We sent her there last time, they helped out a lot." Lindsey said.

"Oh well OK then. She'll need to stay there for two months, I'll be making personal visits myself. And if she slips up one time I will send her jail." He warned.

"Alright. Thank you sir." I said, grabbing Lindsey's hand and walking out of the court room.