The Unforgettable

Chris’s arm is wrapped completely around me snugging me close against him. The alarm on his phone starts blaring and I can feel him jolt behind me. He reaches over to the bedside table on the other side of the bed and turns it off. He takes a sleepy sigh, turns back to me and rubs my arm placing a kiss on the top of my head.

“You awake baby?” he asks.

“Mhm,” reply quietly.

“How’d you sleep?”

Constrained compared to the past nights. Last night was the first night we’ve slept in the same bed for a while. I didn’t anticipate lying together, but I didn’t see it fit to kick him out either. After I made the appointment yesterday, we talked about it then spent a couple hours on the couch watching TV together. Around five Chris said he made reservations at a restaurant for 6:30. Turns out this restaurant was a five-star glitz and glam type of place so I was forced to dress up and pin up my hair. The food was delicious though, so was the wine, but I learned my lesson and stopped at two glasses. I got a buzz, I think that’s why I didn’t fight it when Chris followed me into the room, helped with unzipping my dress, undressed himself and climbed into bed with me.

“Good,” I say.

He kisses my neck, “me too. I’ve missed sleeping with you.”

I take a long blink, shake my head a little and peel his fingers from my body.

“We’re not at that point yet,” I sit up.

He sits up too and presses his lips to my bare back, “I’ve missed you so much,” he whispers against my skin.

I sigh, “Chris.”

His hand slides around to my belly and slides up, I take in a sharp breath and stand up from the bed.

He looks at me with sad eyes, groans a little then sighs looking at the blanket, well we’re off to a great start. I look at the clock it says it’s 8:05.

“Are we still doing this thing?” I ask.

He nods, I go to the dresser to grab clothes and hop in the shower. He hops in next while I finish touching up and in about twenty or thirty minutes later we’re riding in the car as I direct him the way.
We get to the building and my stomach clenches and my heart hurts too. We parallel park in front of his office behind his car, I take a deep breath and Chris takes my hand.

“Hey, you okay?”

I look at him and nod trying to calm my features, “yeah you?”

“Yeah, you just look a nervous or something.”

“Oh,” I shake my head and unbuckle my seatbelt, “no I’m fine. Ready?”

He nods, and we get out of the car. Chris follows me to the building and up the metal stairs, I stand a second too long at the heavy door with my shoulder against it, but I pretend that I just didn’t know I needed to force it harder.

This time Carlo is in the lobby area ready to greet us. He’s standing at the bookcase illuminated by the orangish light and turns to look at us.

“Hello,” Carlo says walking towards us. “Nice to see you again, Gianna welcome back, Chris welcome to my office.”

They shake hands again and we follow him to the back room with all the windows. We sit in the chairs, Chris in the left chair me in the right in front of Carlo’s desk and he sits behind it. Chris stares out of the window to the left of him and Carlo and I take the second to share a look.

“You’ve got a great view of this field out here man,” Chris says looking at Carlo he shoots his eyes down, smiles then looks at Chris.

“Yes, it’s nice when my mind gets clouded to just turn around in my chair and become engrossed in the peace and serenity of nature.”

Chris smiles, and I do too.

“Well,” Carlo says. “what brings you here to me?” he’s looking at Chris.

Chris looks uneasy, he’s in the hot seat now. He re-positions in the chair, glances at me then back to him and rests his right foot on the top of his left knee.

“I’d imagine Gianna’s shared with you the terrible things I’ve done.”

Carlo raises an eyebrow and tilts his head slightly.

“No, we haven’t talked about many issues, we haven’t covered much at all.”

Chris looks at me, “why is that?”

“I told you I wasn’t entirely comfortable with doing this,” I shrug.

Carlo chimes in, “we’ve covered more than most do in two sessions so don’t feel down about it.”

My cheeks flush, yeah we’ve covered a whole lot.

“Well. . .” Chris clears his throat. “I’m here to get advice from you on how to fix our marriage.”

Carlo straightens in his chair, “I can do my best to help you. . . How long have you two been married?”

“Six years, our anniversary was just yesterday.”

“Yesterday?” Carlo’s eyes shoot to me then rests back on Chris. “Happy Anniversary!” he tries to appear joyful.

“Thank you,” Chris says.

“Well you two seemed like you enjoyed yourselves yesterday at the park.”

I burn red with embarrassment thinking of the kiss Chris tried to show off with.

Chris shrugs, “that was the first time we’ve actually done something in a while.”

“Well, sounds like you’re off to a great start. Spending time together is a way to form, mend and reform a relationship. Tell me, what do you think is a real problem in your relationship?”

Chris takes a breath and shakes his foot, “I don’t know. . . I suppose communication, we don’t communicate as well as we used to.”

“Used to? So a few years ago, in the beginning of the marriage, before the marriage?”

“Well yeah in high school we talked out everything,” Chris looks at me. “We didn’t want to break up like all of our friends were doing. . . When we got married it was the same in the beginning but as college started and ended and we found our jobs I feel we kind of fell into a routine and distanced from each other.”

Carlo looks at me, “what do you think?”

I grow big eyed because I don’t even want to be here let alone talk about my relationship with him.

I nod, “yeah I agree.”

Carlo gives me a small smile then turns back to Chris.

“So as the communication grew awry, did you find yourself looking for purpose through other things, like your job? You seem like an ambitious man.”

Chris nods, “well yeah. I’m just trying to get to the top of the ladder like everyone else, I think I’ve done pretty well.”

Chris, for about a year now has been the head of accounting in the office, Carlo smiles and nods.

“That’s great, I’m sure you have some fans at work, along with enemies.”

Chris nods and Carlo asks another question. “Where do you believe your marriage took the biggest dive?”

Chris groans quietly, hangs his head and rubs the palm of his head on his forehead, scratches the top of his head then finally looks at Carlo again.

“I uh, it- Hm. . .” he hums. “There’s a woman at my job. . .” he clears his throat again. “I don’t know what made me do it, why I was so selfish and such an idiot but I had an affair with this woman for a while. . .”

Carlo’s eyebrows rise, he looks at me for a few seconds with soft eyes, I sigh and look away. I don’t need his sympathy, this is exactly why I didn’t want to talk to him about my issues, I don’t need people feeling sorry for me.

“I’m sorry you were betrayed Gianna. . .” Carlo says, he seems offended by the news Chris just shared. “How’d you feel when you learned about this?”

I roll my eyes, I don’t need this right now. “Uh I was pretty upset and pissed off. How would you feel if you found out your wife that you thought you were blissfully in love with was cheating the whole time?”

“I didn’t cheat our whole marriage Gianna,” Chris responds curtly.

“Basically,” I mumble.

He makes a sound and Carlo asks the question I’ve asked already at least twice.

“How long was the affair?”

Chris clears his throat, “does that matter?”

I burst, “why the fuck do you always avoid that question?”

Chris and Carlo both look at me, Carlo’s wide eyed but Chris looks uneasy.

“I just don’t see why it matters. What difference does it make if it was two months or two years, either way I cheated.”

My body’s burning with anger again. “Yeah scumbag but getting your dick wet by some floozy for two months is a hell of a lot easier to swallow than two years!”

Chris looks at me then at Carlo with begging eyes.

“We should take a little intermission,” Carlo says.

My eyes are stinging with tears, Chris runs a hand through his hair and Carlo rises from his chair.

“Would you mind if we spoke out in the lobby?” he’s asking Chris.

“Um no,” Chris stands too and they walk out of the room.

This is a stupid and unnecessary situation to be in, I want to walk out right now. Chris is just undoing the progress we've made, because I'm pissed about it all over again. Like this is the first time I'm hearing of his cheating. I don’t even want him looking at me let alone sleep in the bed with me. He’s stupid and he makes me sick.

They stay out there for probably seven minutes then Carlo walks in alone, he sits in the chair Chris was in facing me. He doesn’t say anything, just looks at me, a tear rolls down my cheek. He gasps quietly and without thinking rubs it away with his thumb.

“I’m sorry,” he says.

More tears fall as I shake my head, “no reason to be sorry. You didn’t do anything.”

I sniffle and hang my head as tears keep running, he’s crouching at my feet now trying to catch my eye.

“Gianna, you don’t deserve this, this isn’t right. You’re a beautiful , bright, extraordinary woman, you shouldn’t be crying unless it’s out of joy. You deserve better than this, this isn’t fair.”

I look into his green eyes, he stares up into mine. He's right, this isn't fair. Why did I end up with Chris and not this beautiful, sweet, genuine human? The man with the softest lips I’ve ever felt, the kindest eyes I’ve ever seen, the sweetest personality I’ve ever known. Without thinking I reach down tangling my fingers in his curly hair, pull his face up slightly as I bend down and kiss him. I kiss him hard and hot knotting my fingers in his hair even more. One of his hands go to the arm of the chair to balance himself and the other goes to my thigh. I part my lips against his and we taste each other’s tongues, then there’s a quick knock on the door. We quickly break apart, he swiftly rises to his feet, tousles his hair and opens the door. Chris stands there, mutters something about how he wants to continue another time, Carlo says that’s probably a good idea.

Chris tries to pay him but Carlo denies.

“I won’t charge you this time or next, I’ll consider it an extended first session, I don’t normally charge for the first appointment.”

“Oh, nice,” Chris says and clears his throat. “Gianna?”

I wipe my face free of tears, stand and look at him with hard eyes.

“Ready to go?” he asks.

Instead of answering I tell Carlo it was really nice seeing him again and brush pass Chris and out of the building to breathe fresh air.

Standing there I make up my mind.

I’m very interested in Carlo, he can make me feel things that Chris can’t. Carlo gives me warmth and comfortably whereas Chris gives me pain and trust issues. He very well may still be screwing around with Leana and this whole thing is just a front in order for me to cheer up and things go back to normal. He isn’t being completely honest with me so there’s no reason for me to be completely honest with him. I’m going to pursue things with Carlo whether I’m with Chris or not. He did it, why can’t I?