Breathe Me in Sweet Suffering

I have only one friend.

Yes you heard right. Of all the students of Scranton High I have only one.

It's not because I am shy or a geek or anything like that. I am actually quite outspoken and yet hardly anyone knows my real name. Or perhaps they do and just don't care. They call me Snowy or midget. Isn't that great? Snowy.

So why have I been deemed an outcast and named Snowy?

There may be many reasons for that but one of the biggest is him.

Chris Cerulli.

One of the meanest bullies to ever have walked Scranton high school.

It could have been avoided, I know that. But I am stubborn. The reason I winded up on Chris' bad side was Kim. Sweet overly shy Kim that can't talk to people without looking on the ground and start stuttering. We have absolutely nothing in common but I have always had a soft spot for the outcasts and I knew she was one the second her mother brought her over to meet the stepdaughter of her cousin.

And I liked her.

She said the funniest things and had the most interesting observations of things around her.

Now, you probably wonder why befriending an outcast could make me one?

Normally someone outspoken like me wouldn't be deemed an outcast just because she befriended one. Weird perhaps but not an outcast. But Kim came with luggage. And that luggage was Chris Cerulli. He had more or less tortured her since preschool. And poor Kim was too timid to do anything but break down in tears.

And that's where I came in. First day of school and Chris egged her. Like in two packages of not so well kept eggs. And me being well me, exploded. I am sure one could hear me screaming at him all the way to the Lakawanna forest. Chris Cerulli really didn't like that. So from that day his main torture victim changed from Kim to me.

And nobody talks or befriends someone on Chris Cerulli`s bad side because he is popular. An asshole and a manwhore but still popular. Every day he did something. Throwing spitballs on me in class, writing things on my locker, ruing my things or the so very mature maneuver of tripping me.

I soon learned that if I did something back it only got worse. So I gritted my teeth and bared it. At least he had almost completely lain off Kim. The only good thing in all of this. That should be the end of the story right?

It isn't.

You see, Kim had this crush on someone. One of the popular boys and ironically, Chris' friend. TJ Bell. Of course she never had a shot with the guy but I never told her that. She already knew so putting salt in the wound would just be cruel.

For two years there was TJ this and TJ that. And I listened like the good friend I am. Then TJ got a paper saying Kim likes her.

And it happened.

The miracle of miracles that only happens in the movies. He noticed her and oddly enough he dumped his popular friends and started hanging out with Kim and I at all times.

Hah! In your face Chris Cerulli!

Of course Chris didn't leave it at that. He was dead set on breaking them apart so I put myself in his way rather than trying to avoid the asshole. I was used to Chris Cerulli`s harassment so I thought I would do fine.

Except his temper had gotten way worse than it had been. He had always had a bad temper but during that time he was more like a barrel of something highly explosive that would blow up in your face if you so much as looked at it and imagined it blowing up. Chris had changed from a bully to a dangerous bully.

One day he did something he had never done before.

He hit me.

Square right in the nose and broke it. And the asshole didn't even look sorry. Lucky me, he got suspended for two weeks after creating some kind of a brawl in the lunch area the same day.

Two blissful Chris free weeks.

Then he got mono.

It should have been perfect but Kim spent more and more time with TJ and kept dissing me. I held up the hope. As soon as they had been together for a while they would stop looking like they were glued together at the hip. And Kim and I would have some alone time together again, just us girls.

I came home one day, keeled over and mom called the doctor. Mono. Ha. Of course I had gotten mono. Three weeks in bed thinking I would die.

And the worst part.

No calls from Kim. None at all. It was like I had just dropped off her radar.

First day of school I was set on forgiving her. She was after all my only friend and I loved her like a little sister.

Then I saw it.

Kim, TJ and Chris. Hanging together.
My torturer. Satan's kid.

Kim noticed me the second I walked up to school and her eyes were full of guilt. She didn't even say hello, just wrapped her arm around TJ's and walked into school with Chris in tow. That's when I realized I had lost my only friend. She would rather hang with her boyfriend and the guy who used to make her life a living hell. She had picked side and never said a word too me again.

My name is Katt.

I used to have a friend. Now I have no one. And it comes down to Chris Cerulli. Hardly logic but it doesn't take much effort in blaming him for all my problems. After all I would never have been an outcast in the first place if it wasn't for Chriis Cerulli.

I fucking hate Christopher Thomas Cerulli with every ounce of my being.