The Dare

VICS POV

"I need to tell you something" I said quietly. I was dreading this, I knew it was going to hurt him but I had honestly forgotten.

"Okay" said Kellin walking to the passenger side of the car and getting inside. "What's up?" he asked

I sighed and willed myself to look at him, he gave me a reassuring smile and I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Fuck!" I whispered angrily, how did I let it get to this? Why hadn't I sorted this out earlier? I was going to but it completely left my mind when I developed feelings Kellin.

"Vic? Are you okay?" asked Kellin's soft voice, he lay a hand on my arm and I tensed for a split second. Kellin must have felt it too because he slowly removed his hand and lay it on his lap, lacing it with his other.

We sat in silence for a minute before I took another a breath and turned to face him properly.

"I love you Kellin" I started "Your the only person I've ever loved like this and I want you to know that I'd never hurt you on purpose"

I was a nervous wreck and I'd do anything to just skip this scene and head on to the part where everything is okay. Kellin nodded his head and gave me a weird look.

"I know and I love you too" he said smiling "Is that what you wanted to tell me?" he asked

"No. Erm, you know when we were dating? Before you knew about the whole …Danny thing?"

He nodded his head slowly and looked at me in confusion. He was so adorable with his cute little lips and eyebrows furrowed, it made me feel worse about this.

"Remember Jaime? My… friend from Mexico?" Kellin nodded and smiled again.

"Yeah, the one with hedgehog hair?" he laughed

"Yeah him, urmm … well w-we were … kind of dating too" I said getting quieter and quieter. I looked away from him, I didn't want to see his face, the hurt and disgust I'm sure he'd look at me with will just break me.

"What?" he said after a minute, his voice quiet but I heard him clearly.

I looked at him and he was frowning at me.

"That wasn't Mike that called before" I carried on "it was Jaime"

Kellin looked away and out the window so I couldn't see his face but I knew he wasn't happy, I mean of course he wouldn't be happy. Ugh! how did you manage to fuck this up Vic?

"He flew here from Mexico as soon as he could to see if I was okay because of the whole Danny thing" I said quickly

Kellin turned to me with a blank expression, I tried to figure out what he was thinking and usually I can but this time I could tell he was trying hard to hide his feelings.

"Well…" he said "You better go see him then"

"Kellin, please don't be angry with me, I was going to tell you but I just didn't find the time and-"

"I'm not angry Vic" he interrupted me "I mean I'm not happy, but I'll get over it. It was in the past right? And we said we'd forget about everything and start afresh, so… I think you'll have to go and see him" he smiled

I was shocked at his response, he'd taken this better than I'd expected but then again, he hasn't heard everything yet.

"There's still a bit more to it" I said "remember when you first told me you loved me? And I ran away?"

He nodded his head and smiled a little but I could see it in eyes that he was scared of what I was going to say.

"Well, the first thing I did when I got home was go straight to Jaime" I said, a look of pain flashed across Kellin's eyes but was quickly replaced by nothing.

"I was going to break up with him… but I didn't, I couldn't, He'd just found out that his mother was admitted to hospital so I didn't break up with him" I explained.

He didn't say anything. He didn't even move, he blinked his eyes a few times before closing them. My heart was beating in my ears, I know I've fucked this up and that I've hurt him and I wouldn't blame him if he wanted to end this between us but I just couldn't let that happen.

"Like I said" said Kellin quietly and calmly "you'll have to go see him" he opened the car door, got out and slammed it shut.

"Kellin! I'm sorry, I forgot, please!" I shouted out the window, he stopped when he reached the door to his house and looked back at me.

"Fuck you Vic" he said loud enough for me to hear and then slammed the door.

Shit! I got out of the car and jogged to Kellin's door, I can't let him go, I just can't do that. I tried to open the door but he's locked it so I knocked on it instead.

"Kellin?" I shouted nervously "Kellin please, I'm sorry, please just let me in and we can talk about this" I shouted

I heard a quiet sob come from inside the house, I got down on one knee and peeked through the letter box. Kellin was sitting on the other side of the door, hugging his legs to his chest and resting his head on his knees. I sat down quietly and sighed.

"I forgot all about him Kellin… all I could think about was you and your safety and me being with you-"

"But why didn't you tell me when he came last time? He was here for a week and you had all that time to tell me, to break up with him" he interrupted

"I know" I groaned "I know but… ugh! I'm so fucking stupid" I whispered to myself

And I was, why don't I ever fucking think? I mess things up all the time, especially with people that I love and usually when I mess things up I just leave it but not this time, not with him.

"Okay, listen, I know I can't go back to the past and change things because if I could believe me I would, I know I hurt you… and as cliché as this is gonna sound, it hurts me more knowing that your hurting and I'm causing it" I said to the door

"Go away Vic" I heard him whisper and I felt my heart breaking, he can't leave me, he just can't.

"Kellin please… please kells, I messed up and I understand if you don't want to see me right now but please you can't leave me" I begged. I couldn't imagine not being without him, oh fuck it feels just like the first time we broke up.

"I-I love you" I stammered, I could feel tears welling up in my eyes and I quickly wiped them away before they could fall. We sat for a few minutes in silence and I was about to knock on the door to see if Kellin was still there when my phone beeped alerting me of a message.

From:Jaime
Where are you? Your not hurt are you?

I found the text slightly amusing. Yes, I am hurt, but not in the way you'd think. I looked back to the door and sighed, maybe I'll try talking to him again.

"Kellin?" I called through door, he didn't answer but I knew he was still there because I heard some shuffling on the other side.

"Kellin please…" I said, I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself if he doesn't want me anymore. I stood up from my place on the floor and stood waiting for a few minutes but he didn't open the door.

My phone vibrated and I looked down at it to see Jaime was calling me, I hesitated for a second before pressing the red button. I'd talk to him later but right now I have to sort this out with Kellin.

"Kellin? I'm going to fix this okay?… I'm not going to let you go, please kells? I can't be without you… I love you" I said and I felt the tears in my eyes once again.

There was a moment of silence until I heard the sound of a lock and saw the door open slowly to reveal a puffy eyed Kellin. He looked down at the floor and stepped forward carefully and wrapped my arms around his small shoulders. He slowly lifted his arms and hugged me back tightly, I sighed in relief.

"I love you okay? I never wanted to hurt you, but I'm going to fix this I promise" I said kissing the top of his head, his grip tightened and I smiled.

"Why don't you come with me?" I suggested "We can tell him together and I could really use your support" I lied, I just don't him out of my sight so I can make sure he won't change his mind. I know it's a bad idea but I can't afford to lose him in anyway.

"You don't need my support, I know you can do this by yourself" he replied pulling away a little and wiping at his face.

"Fine" I sighed "but Mike had been dying to see you and I said I'd bring you to him after we finished talking" I winked and smirked at him, his cheeks turning a slight red tint, he is so cute.

"Okay then, but I'm only going to see Mike" he said and nodded my head in agreement. I took his hand in mine and lead him back to the car, I opened the door for him and he was about to get in when he stopped.

"What's wrong?" I asked, worry rising in me

"I-I… please don't hurt me again" he said in a small voice and I swear I felt my heart shattering into a million pierces from the tone of his voice and the look on his face. I can't believe I caused that, this beautiful boy, his perfect smile, soft hair, amazing eyes and gorgeous lips can look so hurt and fragile.

"Never ever" I replied "I promise you, I won't ever hurt again, I'm so sorry" I kissed his lips gently and then he got into the car.

My heart was beating fast as I walked over to the drivers side and got in the car. I really don't want to hurt him again but knowing me, I know I'll screw this up again somehow.