And You Let Her Go

The waitress sat us at a table near the window, just they way I liked it.

“Are there any drinks you’d like to start off with?” she asked Niall, giving him the biggest smile I’d ever seen. I raised my eyebrows as I looked down at my menu.

“Just some water with lemon, please,” she flipped her hair before turning to me.

“And for you?” she asked me, almost bored.

I laughed out loud, “I’ll have the same.” She walked away with another glance at Niall.

He looked at me curiously. “Did I miss something?”

“Did you really not see how that waitress was staring at you? She was ready to pounce,” I covered my mouth, still laughing.

He chuckled and looked down at his menu, oblivious to what happened just a couple seconds ago.

“So what will it be, Horan?” I asked, referring to the menu.

“I’m debating whether to take the grilled salmon and veggies or chicken…”

I smirked at him, “Chicken!” We both said at the same time, grinning. He took my hand in his and we laughed at our lame joke.

I noticed Niall shift uncomfortably in his chair. He opened his mouth as if to say something but then the damn waitress came back.

“Do you need a couple minutes or are you ready to order?” she asked Niall.

“We’ll be having the Chicken platter,” I answered her, trying to imitate her biggest smile from before. Niall looked down, hiding his grin and she walked away rolling her eyes.

I hadn’t been on many first dates but I’m pretty sure this wasn’t how it was supposed to be going. Even though Niall and I were holding hands across the table, he seemed distant as ever. Was there something wrong with me or was he just deep in thought? I tried to decrease the tension.

“So, Niall, what do you do for a living?” I teased, asking the generic first date question.

He smiled and let go of my hand, reaching for his glass of water. Why was this so awkward? Any other time we hung out we never needed conversation starters; everything just sort of…flowed.

I gave him a worried look. He put his glass down.

“There’s this girl,” he blurted out. I eyed him, almost choking on my own glass of water. So that’s what this was about.

“Niall!” I screeched, squeezing his hand reassuringly. I grinned at him and his stature immediately softened.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?!” I couldn’t keep my excitement down and all he’d said was ‘there was a girl.’

“Calm down, Jenson,” he said grinning, “I thought that telling you would mean you’d be forced to stay composed…and civilized, but that obviously isn’t true,” he chuckled.

I swatted his arm, “Hey! We could have had a movie night though, not some ‘proper dinner,’” I narrowed my eyes at him.

“Yeah, that’s true… how about we do that after we eat, yeah?” he raised his eyebrows. I turned around to see what he was pointing to and saw the waitress coming our way.

She set the plates down and mumbled an “enjoy” under her breath that I don’t think even Niall heard.

He ignored her and started stabbing his fork at the chicken. I chuckled, spreading the napkin over my lap.

“What’s her name? How did you meet? When can I meet her?” I all but blurted out to him.

He chuckled and scrunched his face, probably deciding which question to answer first, “Etta Clive. She’s so beautiful and she’s Lou’s new assistant. I’ve only talked to her a couple times but there’s something…about her that makes me want to be with her all the time.”

I sighed, wishing someone would think that way about me, but then quickly pushed the thought away. “Jeez, Horan, didn’t know you had it in ya,” I teased, winking at him. “But seriously, you need to chat her up a little more! Make her laugh, tell her she has a nice smile, then ask her out. Boom, you got yourself a date.”

His eyes widened, “That’s it?”

“Well you can’t be a dick about it! Let it move slowly… if you’re sweet about it and if she’s as great as she sounds…” I shrugged, leaving the rest of the sentence for him to figure out.

He took a deep breath.

“So you’re not mad?” he asked with a worried look.

“Why would I be mad?” I looked at him curiously, swallowing my chicken. It was pretty great apart from the weird after taste. I wonder if the waitress spit in mine…

“I basically tricked you into thinking this was a date and you got all dressed up for nothing,” he looked away, guilty.

I reached for his hand, “No way! I love this dress and tonight we are just two friends, going out for dinner, talking about our lives. There,” I simply stated.

“Great!” he looked relieved. “I think we were only made to be best mates.”

I was genuinely touched by what Niall had said. Apart from Emily, I didn’t have any other close friends. After meeting the boys, I suspected that would change.

“Definitely,” I winked at him. We finished our chicken and Niall ordered us two apple crumbles.

“So, enough about my life then. What’s going on with yours? How’s living with Haz?”

I didn’t know which question to answer first, so I decided to ignore the second one.

“Nothing has really been going on, apart from the obvious,” he nodded, knowing I was referring to the funeral. “I have yet to see London, although I don’t think I’ll be able to do that with the little time I have left here. Plus I still need to look for a job when I get home… This all must seem very boring to you,” I blushed.

“No, not at all, actually. Sometimes I envy a life like that. Don’t get me wrong, I’m in love with what the boys and I have, but peace and quiet seem like paradise sometimes,” I nodded, knowing exactly what he meant.

“And Harry?” he asked.

“What about Harry?”

“I don’t know, you tell me. You’re living with the guy.”

I tried giving him the best smile I could give, “Everything is fine, we don’t fight. He’s like a big brother,” I mumbled the last part.

Niall scoffed, “That’s bullshit and you know it. What’s going on?”

I fought the tears that suddenly pricked my eyes. Why was I so emotional whenever I thought about Harry? God I was lame.

He squeezed my hand reassuringly; I guess that was our new thing.

I tried to say it quickly, “At Will’s party I was looking for the bathroom and instead walked in on Harry and some brunette doing it under the covers. He saw me,” I added in the end.

Before he could say anything I started again, “And it’s not like we have something, Harry and I. We were just friends and he was a better one who happened to offer me a place to stay instead of staying with my god-awful mother. It’s just that the moment I saw them together, I thought, wow, I was stupid for ever thinking there might be something between us. And now, here I am, rambling about my sad little life to his best friend. Now that… that is pathetic,” I looked down at my empty plate and rested my head against my palm.

Niall reached over and wiped a tear away I hadn’t known escaped.

“Charlie, that’s not pathetic. Harry’s been acting differently ever since that party. You’re not the only one that’s feeling this way,” Niall rubbed his thumb against my hand. I was relieved for having told him instead of keeping this secret inside me this whole time. I hadn’t even called Emily about it…

“I highly doubt that, he just probably feels bad for not locking the door,” I scoffed.

“You never know unless you talk to him about it,” Niall turned my chin towards him, forcing me to make eye contact. “You’ll talk to him, yeah?”

I looked into his blue eyes a long time before answering him. His eyes were very different from the green ones I was so used to seeing. Niall raised his eyebrows and squeezed my hand, waiting for an answer.

I nodded, wiping away the last tear.